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in: Article stubs, The Nostalgia Critic Transcripts, Transcripts,
and 4 more

Changes: X-Men: The Last Stand

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(Back from my practice...and is REALLY unhappy with the results? Did neither of you watch these movies?!)
Tag: Visual edit
(Done all the intros to the X-Men reviews so far)
Tag: Visual edit
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'''Deep Voice (Doug): '''Previously on "X-Month"...
  
'''Deep Voice (Doug): '''Previously on "X-Month"...
   
−
''(The video then cuts to Tamara in a room, wearing a "Previously on X-Men" cap and looking angry as she calls someone on her cell phone)''
 +
''(The video then cuts to Tamara in a room as a fangirl, wearing a "Previously on X-Men" cap and looking angry as she calls someone on her cell phone)''
   
 
'''Deep Voice: '''Eighteen years ago*...
  
'''Deep Voice: '''Eighteen years ago*...
 
* NOTE: Wrong counting there, since ''X-Men: The Last Stand'' came out in 2006, which would make it thirteen years ago and not eighteen.
  
* NOTE: Wrong counting there, since ''X-Men: The Last Stand'' came out in 2006, which would make it thirteen years ago and not eighteen.
−
''(The video cuts to Malcolm reading a Marvel omnibus as he answers the phone)''
 +
''(The video cuts to Malcolm as a fanboy named Billy reading a Marvel omnibus as he answers the phone)''
   
 
'''Tamara: '''Billy!
  
'''Tamara: '''Billy!
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'''Tamara: '''Goodbye!
  
'''Tamara: '''Goodbye!
   
−
''(Tamara hangs up...)''
 +
''(Tamara hangs up)''
   
−
'''Deep Voice (Doug) (VO): '''Ten years later...
 +
'''Deep Voice (Doug) (vo): '''Ten years later...
   
−
''(...only to immediately call Billy again)''
 +
''(Tamara immediately calls Billy again)''
   
 
'''Tamara: '''Billy!
  
'''Tamara: '''Billy!
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'''Tamara:''' It was...AWESOME!
  
'''Tamara:''' It was...AWESOME!
   
−
'''Billy: ''' ''(smiles)'' Really?!
 +
'''Billy: '''''(smiles)'' Really?!
   
 
'''Tamara: '''They focus a ton on Wolverine...
  
'''Tamara: '''They focus a ton on Wolverine...
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'''Tamara: '''It is. I'm gonna hang up now because of how happy I am!
  
'''Tamara: '''It is. I'm gonna hang up now because of how happy I am!
   
−
'''Billy: '''As you should!
 +
'''Billy: '''As you should! This was worth seeing in the same spot, never changing my clothes for a decade.
  +
  +
'''Tamara: '''Goodbye!
  +
  +
''(She hangs up. A caption is shown in a black background saying, "Well...maybe there's a bit more to it than that." We are then shown the "X-Month" opening, before cutting to NC in his room)''
  +
  +
'''NC: '''Hello, I'm the Nostalgia Critic. I remember it so you don't have to. And welcome back to "X-Month", where now, we look at one of the most hated ''X-Men ''movies, if not, the most hated ''X-Men ''movie, ''X-Men: The Last Stand''.
  +
  +
''(The title of ''X-Men: The Last Stand ''is shown, before showing its clips)''
  +
  +
'''NC (vo): '''With the directing chair now being filled by Brett Ratner...
  +
  +
'''NC: '''''(looking uneasy) ''From one controversial director to another... ''(Images of Bryan Singer and Brett Ratner are shown)''
  +
  +
'''NC (vo): '''...''X-Men: The Last Stand ''was less of a critical darling and an absolutely despised addition to the ''X-Men ''franchise. Fans hated how many characters died, how unfocused it was, how it seemed to amount to nothing... ''(Several images of what NC describes are shown) ''...how it killed President Kennedy, how it caused the Great Depression, and how it directed ''[[Norm of the North]] 2''. You couldn't contain the amount of hatred this movie got and still gets today.
  +
  +
''(NC is revealed to have put on some armor on his chest, is wearing an army helmet, and is holding a yellow shield)''
  +
  +
'''NC: '''[[Doug's Top 10 Movies He Likes But Everybody Else Hates|I kind of have a soft spot for it.]]
  +
  +
''(As expected, the audience boos and starts shooting bullets and throwing grenades at NC, who covers himself with his shield. Footage of the film resumes being shown)''
  +
  +
'''NC (vo): '''Okay, I'm not insane. I know this movie is bad and doesn't work. From a structural standpoint, [[Top 11 Worst Movie Sequels|it's one of the worst sequels ever made]], especially when you get to the end.
  +
  +
'''NC: '''But after how boring and wow-less the [[X-Men (NC)|other]] [[X2: X-Men United|two]] were, out of the original three, I kind of consider this one the most entertaining.
  +
  +
'''NC (vo): '''It has the most risks, the most action, the most color, the most mutants, and the most compelling ideas outside of just... ''(A large caption is shown as NC says it in a very deep voice) ''Prejudice sucks!
  +
  +
'''NC: '''''(still in a deep voice) ''Oh, yeah! We went there!
  +
  +
'''NC (vo; normal): '''Sure, its story and characters are weak, and the ending doesn't really go anywhere, but I'm kind of used to that in these movies by now. I mean, what's worse? Safe, bland, middle-of-the-road tedium, or batshit insanity that never once left you bored? Well, that's the geeky compilation we're gonna analyze here today.
  +
  +
'''NC: '''Let's take a look at the clearly bad, but in my opinion, enjoyably bad ''X-Men: The Last Stand''.
   
 
{{NCscripts}}
  
{{NCscripts}}

Revision as of 04:25, 22 March 2019

X-Men: The Last Stand

X-men last stand nc

Released
March 20, 2019
Running Time
23:32
Previous Review
Next Review
Link

(The Channel Awesome logo plays, followed by the "X-Month" title)

Deep Voice (Doug): Previously on "X-Month"...

(The video then cuts to Tamara in a room as a fangirl, wearing a "Previously on X-Men" cap and looking angry as she calls someone on her cell phone)

Deep Voice: Eighteen years ago*...

  • NOTE: Wrong counting there, since X-Men: The Last Stand came out in 2006, which would make it thirteen years ago and not eighteen.

(The video cuts to Malcolm as a fanboy named Billy reading a Marvel omnibus as he answers the phone)

Tamara: Billy!

Billy: Hey, what's up?

Tamara: I just saw X-Men 3!

Billy: Yeah, how was it?

Tamara: It was awful!

Billy: Really?

Tamara: They focus a ton on Wolverine...

Billy: Yeah...

Tamara: ...like, everyone dies...

Billy: Dude!

Tamara: And they even kill off Xavier!

Billy: Oh, my God. This sounds like the worst movie ever.

Tamara: It is. I'm gonna hang up now because of how angry I am!

Billy: As you should.

Tamara: Goodbye!

(Tamara hangs up)

Deep Voice (Doug) (vo): Ten years later...

(Tamara immediately calls Billy again)

Tamara: Billy!

Billy: Hey, what's up?

Tamara: I just saw Logan.

Billy: Yeah, how was it?

Tamara: It was...AWESOME!

Billy: (smiles) Really?!

Tamara: They focus a ton on Wolverine...

Billy: Yeah...

Tamara: ...like, everyone dies...

Billy: Dude!

Tamara: And they even kill off Xavier!

Billy: Oh, my God! This sounds like the best movie ever!

Tamara: It is. I'm gonna hang up now because of how happy I am!

Billy: As you should! This was worth seeing in the same spot, never changing my clothes for a decade.

Tamara: Goodbye!

(She hangs up. A caption is shown in a black background saying, "Well...maybe there's a bit more to it than that." We are then shown the "X-Month" opening, before cutting to NC in his room)

NC: Hello, I'm the Nostalgia Critic. I remember it so you don't have to. And welcome back to "X-Month", where now, we look at one of the most hated X-Men movies, if not, the most hated X-Men movie, X-Men: The Last Stand.

(The title of X-Men: The Last Stand is shown, before showing its clips)

NC (vo): With the directing chair now being filled by Brett Ratner...

NC: (looking uneasy) From one controversial director to another... (Images of Bryan Singer and Brett Ratner are shown)

NC (vo): ...X-Men: The Last Stand was less of a critical darling and an absolutely despised addition to the X-Men franchise. Fans hated how many characters died, how unfocused it was, how it seemed to amount to nothing... (Several images of what NC describes are shown) ...how it killed President Kennedy, how it caused the Great Depression, and how it directed Norm of the North 2. You couldn't contain the amount of hatred this movie got and still gets today.

(NC is revealed to have put on some armor on his chest, is wearing an army helmet, and is holding a yellow shield)

NC: I kind of have a soft spot for it.

(As expected, the audience boos and starts shooting bullets and throwing grenades at NC, who covers himself with his shield. Footage of the film resumes being shown)

NC (vo): Okay, I'm not insane. I know this movie is bad and doesn't work. From a structural standpoint, it's one of the worst sequels ever made, especially when you get to the end.

NC: But after how boring and wow-less the other two were, out of the original three, I kind of consider this one the most entertaining.

NC (vo): It has the most risks, the most action, the most color, the most mutants, and the most compelling ideas outside of just... (A large caption is shown as NC says it in a very deep voice) Prejudice sucks!

NC: (still in a deep voice) Oh, yeah! We went there!

NC (vo; normal): Sure, its story and characters are weak, and the ending doesn't really go anywhere, but I'm kind of used to that in these movies by now. I mean, what's worse? Safe, bland, middle-of-the-road tedium, or batshit insanity that never once left you bored? Well, that's the geeky compilation we're gonna analyze here today.

NC: Let's take a look at the clearly bad, but in my opinion, enjoyably bad X-Men: The Last Stand.

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