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Valentine

Valentine Phelous

Aired
February 4, 2012
Running time
12:35
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Phelous: Happy Valentine's Day! I got you guys something very special involving David Boreanaz!

(A sequence of images featuring Boreanaz in some of his starring roles is shown.)

Phelous: That doesn't even remotely make sense, and far be it for me to ever do that. No. Instead, we'll be doing exactly what the title of this video is! Weird, huh? We'll be doing Valentine.

(The film's theme plays as the episode's title card appears. Then we cut back to Phelous.)

Phelous: Valentine is BORING! Yeah, I said it! (We cut to a shot of an empty room with crickets' chirping in the background before going back to Phelous.) I know there's a lot of you out there who want to defend this! (We cut to a shot of an empty hallway with more chirping in the background before going back to Phelous.) Not even a cameo...? No...? Okay, fine. I guess this review isn't all that edgy. LIKE THE MOVIE! (to himself) Oh, I really need to never do that again.

(Scenes from the film start playing.)

Phelous (vo): Well, I suppose this movie does grant some people's wishes when it gives us Katherine Heigl as the opening kill girl. Of course, that's after I watch her eat! And then a long sequence of nothing followed by more nothing, and then a long sequence of chasing her down! Whoopee boom.

(We go back to Phelous.)

Phelous: This movie's pacing is slooooow! (nods)

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