Channel Awesome
Don't have an account?
Register
Register

Changes: Top 11 Dumbest Superman Moments

Back to page
Edit
No edit summary
No edit summary
Line 226: Line 226:
   
 
NC (voiceover): From which movie? All of them! How come nobody can ever see pass them? Is it really that great a disguise? Look! There's even a scene where Lois takes off Clark's glasses living him totally exposed!
  
NC (voiceover): From which movie? All of them! How come nobody can ever see pass them? Is it really that great a disguise? Look! There's even a scene where Lois takes off Clark's glasses living him totally exposed!
  +
  +
NC: SOMEBODY FRIGGIN' NOTICE HIM!
  +
  +
''Stupid glasses footage''
  +
  +
NC (voiceover): I mean, how is everybody constantly fooled? This idea is so flawed that just about everybody in the world has made fun of it.
  +
  +
''The Tick picture''
  +
  +
NC (voiceover): ''The Tick''...
  +
  +
''Mystery Men picture''
  +
  +
NC (voiceover): ...''Mystery Men''...
  +
  +
''Stupid glasses footage''
  +
  +
NC (voiceover): ...and many more. It's a suspension of disbelief that quite frankely everybody disbelieved, but it could be worse. He could disguise himself as a British...
  +
  +
''British nanny picture''
  +
  +
NC (voiceover): ...nanny when secretly inside, he's just a...
  +
  +
''Robin Williams picture''
  +
  +
NC (voiceover): ...hairy, loud, obnoxious comedian.
  +
  +
NC (laughing): But that wouldn't be nearly as plaussable, would it?
  +
  +
''Stupid glasses footage''
  +
  +
NC (voiceover): Clark Kent: If you can't see pass his glasses, then quite frankely, ''you'' need glasses.
  +
  +
NC: ...and that's no shame.
   
 
{{NCscripts}}
  
{{NCscripts}}

Revision as of 02:01, 31 May 2011

NC: Hello, I'm the Nostalgia Critic, I remember it so you don't have to!

Superman film series footage

NC (voiceover): What can you say about the action-packed, family-friendly Superman movie. I love them--well, most of them--well, some them...2 of them. But either way, they're part of the all American icon that is...Superman. Now for as good as these movies get, and as bad as these movies get, they all have their fill of stupid STUPID moments.

NC: Now I know their supposed to be lighter and more friendly, but most of time, they just come off as logically idiotic. That's why I have compiled a list of the Top 11 Dumbest Moments in the Superman films. Why Top 11? Because I like to go one step beyond. So sit back and enjoy the Top 11 Stupidest Superman Moments.

Superman I opening in the intro and title screen; Interlude

NC (voiceover): Number 11--The Casting of Superman Returns.

Footage from movie

NC (voiceover): Now I don't mean cast members like Kevin Spacey and Frank Langella. They did okay. What I'm mainly referring to is Brandon Routh as Superman & Kate Bosworth as Lois Lane. I mean, they weren't god awful or anything, but...they look 16. It's like if Superman met Dawson's Creek.

Smallville picture

NC (voiceover): Oh, wait! They already did that, but...

Movie footage

NC (voiceover): ...you get my point. They're simply to young to be in this rolls.

Footage from Superman I

NC (voiceover): When I saw the 1st Superman movie, I didn't see actors. I saw friggin' Superman and Lois Lane.

Superman Returns footage

NC (voiceover): When I saw this new movie, I saw kids dressing my for Halloween. Where'd the real actors go?

Lois Lane: Sonuds cheesy. I know.

NC (voiceover): On top of that, they were pretty bland.

Superman I footage

NC (voiceover): I mean, both with supposed to be strong-willed, clever and spuky characters.

Superman Returns footage

NC (voiceover): But here, it's like watching 1st graders, holding hands at a school play. You didn't really buy it.

Lex Luthor: It's a little...alien.

NC (voiceover): I guess the reasoning behind this casting was despite his age, Brandon Routh did look an awful lot like Christopher Reeve.

NC: Well if that's the reasoning, why didn't you hire...

Baby picture with Superman face

NC (voiceover): ...this kid then?

Superman Returns footage

NC (voiceover): I don't know? Like I said, these two aren't horrible; they're just miss-casted, and when your protagonists look like people you ask to the prom rather than All-American heroes, something is definetely wrong.

Lois: Personally, I think that's a load of crap.

Interlude

NC (voiceover): Number 10--The Dumb-Ass Kid at Niagra Falls from Superman II.

Footage from the movie

NC (voiceover): Yeah! You remember this little moron? I mean, I know you gotta pur people in perilous, but how dumb is this kid, and where the hell is his mother?

Kid: Hey! Mom! Look!

Mother (not even paying attention): Uh-Huh. Yeah, honey. That's nice.

NC (mimicking mother): Just don't fall off into the waterfall. Okay, honey? I lost 5 of your brothers that way.

NC (voiceover): I know kids do stupid things, but this is pretty hard to swallow. I mean, does the idiot have a death wish? I guess is he's probably friends with that..

Korn's Follow the Leader cover

NC (voiceover): ...girl who plays hopscotch off a cliff on that Korn album.

Movie footage

Kid falls off rail

NC gasps

NC: That came totally out of nowhere!

Movie footage

"Kid": Remember me as a foolish claud!

NC: Of course, though, Superman comes in to rescue the boy and save the day.

"Superman": Take that, Darwin! Natural selection doesn't win today.

Superman returns kid to dry land

Superman: There you go.

Kid: Again! Again!

Superman: No. I'm sorry. Only one ride per customer.

NC (mimicking Superman): And if you try to commit suicide again, I'll kill you.

Interlude

NC (voiceover): Number 9--The Romantic Flying Scene "Recap" from Superman IV.

Footage from Superman IV: The Quest for Peace

Superman I footage

NC (voiceover): Now we all remember the flying scene from the 1st Superman. It the charming, romantic and all that other mooshey stuff.

Superman IV footage

NC (voiceover): But when you try to recreate it scene by scene, that's just embarrasing. Okay, so it starts out with Superman wanting to talk to Lois about something important. Rather than just fly to her apartment like before, he decides he wants to fuck around with her a bit.

Lois: Clark? Clark! Thing's aren't that bad! Clark! Stop!

She and Clark start falling off her patio, until Clark turns into Superman and saves her.

Lois takes off Superman's glasses

Lois (whispering): Superman!

NC: Ah ha ha! I thought the threat of imminent death would be good for a laugh! Ah ha ha ha! Seriously though, I am a human god.

Superman IV footage

NC (voiceover): So they decide to go flying around for some reason, as Lois has no questions about her co-worker of 20 years being the "Man of friggin' Steel". She just kind of accepts it like she found an extra 20 in her pocket. Now this in all honesty wouldn't be quite so bad if they didn't rip-off every single moment from the 1st one!

Superman I footage

NC (voiceover): Gee, is he gonna fly through the city side by side...

Superman IV footage

NC (voiceover): ..with her like the 1st one? You bet!

Superman I footage

NC (voiceover): Is he gonna support her with just his finger tips which the laws of weight...

Superman IV footage

NC (voiceover): ...and mass totally says is impossible. You know it!

Superman I footage

NC (voiceover): Is he going to let her fall just so he can swoop down and save her?

Superman IV footage

NC: (voiceover): Wel, it wouldn't be a complete rip-off if he didn't, would it? Outside of just using the direct clips, there's absolutely no difference between this scene and the one...

Superman I footage

NC (voiceover): ...from the 1st film. What was the point of...

Superman IV footage

NC (voiceover): ...it? Who knows? Maybe it was just to take the Number 9 spot on the meronic countdown.

Superman: It's not fair.

Interlude

NC (voiceover): Number 8--The Woman and the Baby Carriage from Superman II.

Various dumb mother footage

NC (voiceover): I'm sensing a pattern here that all mothers in Superman movies are complete morons. Lois included in the latest film too. How much obvious can you friggin' get?

Superman II footage

NC (voiceover): But this one takes the cake as a large tower is about to fall on a woman and her baby. So what does she do? Absolutely nothin'! No! Worst than nothing! She covers the child with her body! Yeah! That'll save ya, ya brainless bimbo!

NC: They're called legs! You move them back and forth to create a running motion!

Superman II footage

NC (voiceover): Look at this: At the rate the tower is falling, the way she standin' there crying, she could've run the floor there and back by now!

Superman saves her and the baby

Mother: Thank you!

NC: Thank you for not making me run in heels! Hahahaha! I almost killed my only son!

Superman II footage

NC (voiceover): I don't know why mothers are so stupid in these movies, but quite frankely, this is why I think sometimes you need a LICENSE to be a parent.

Ursa: Like pets?

Zod: I suppose so.

Interlude

NC (voiceover): Number 7--The Special Effects of Superman IV.

Suoerman IV footage

Superman I footage

NC (voiceover): To the credit of the 1st 2 films, you could never see those wires that were holding him up.

Superman IV footage

NC (voiceover): Superman IV? Not so much. Look at all these wire shots! They don't even try to cover them. Or how about the effects in the scene I showed you a moment ago. Yeah! Lois is falling pretty fast there, isn't she? She's falling to the ground like a...feather. Now how about this: You can actually see the black curtains tha are supposed to be outer space!

NC: THIS IS LIKE AN ED WOOD MOVIE!

Superman IV footage

NC (voiceover): How about this scene where he's carrying the Statue of Liberty. Wow! Instant movie magic. How about this one stupid blue screen shot that they use over and over and over again! You'd think as time went on, the effects would get better for these movies, but in Superman's case, it isn't the lead we can't see through; rather those thick bulgy wires that constantly keep getting in the way. This looks like a job for...photoshop!

Interlude

NC (voiceover): Number 6--Those Stupid, STUPID Glasses.

Stupid glasses footage

NC (voiceover): From which movie? All of them! How come nobody can ever see pass them? Is it really that great a disguise? Look! There's even a scene where Lois takes off Clark's glasses living him totally exposed!

NC: SOMEBODY FRIGGIN' NOTICE HIM!

Stupid glasses footage

NC (voiceover): I mean, how is everybody constantly fooled? This idea is so flawed that just about everybody in the world has made fun of it.

The Tick picture

NC (voiceover): The Tick...

Mystery Men picture

NC (voiceover): ...Mystery Men...

Stupid glasses footage

NC (voiceover): ...and many more. It's a suspension of disbelief that quite frankely everybody disbelieved, but it could be worse. He could disguise himself as a British...

British nanny picture

NC (voiceover): ...nanny when secretly inside, he's just a...

Robin Williams picture

NC (voiceover): ...hairy, loud, obnoxious comedian.

NC (laughing): But that wouldn't be nearly as plaussable, would it?

Stupid glasses footage

NC (voiceover): Clark Kent: If you can't see pass his glasses, then quite frankely, you need glasses.

NC: ...and that's no shame.

Community content is available under CC-BY-SA unless otherwise noted.