(Open on Linkara trying to fix a gold item; he sighs)
Linkara: (sarcastically) Hey, I got an idea: why don't we just make it gold? This thing probably never works...
(He then looks up to see that he's on camera; he is startled)
Linkara: Oh! Uh, you should probably just ignore this. Hello, and welcome to Atop the Fourth Wall, where bad comics burn. And welcome once again to Secret Origins Month!
("Secret Origins Month" title is shown; cut to a shot of the X-Men)
Linkara (v/o): Now it's time to talk about the origins of a super team. I decided to go the X-Men instead of the Fantastic Four, because the X-Men have appeared a couple of times already on the show, so those of you less familiar with comic characters should hopefully get a better idea of who I'm talking about with these people.
(Cut to a shot of Stan Lee)
Linkara (v/o): The X-Men were once again the product of the mind of Stan Lee, this time working with Jack Kirby on the premise.
(Cut to a montage of shots of X-Men comics)
Linkara (v/o): When conceived, they were basically just another super team book, though in this case, Lee once again attached the idea of them being young people that the audience could identify with. This time, their mutations were a way for them to feel isolated from others; i.e., alienated because they were different. Another reason why he came up with the X-Men was because, well, Lee was running out of ideas for how superheroes got their powers. Let's face it, radiation may be a method of gaining superpowers, but there are only so many excuses one could have about why someone was standing next to reactors. As such, Lee was happy that he could just use the mutation angle as the explanation for superpowers. So, there you have it: the X-Men came about because Stan Lee was lazy. Mind you, from a scientific perspective, this kind of thing doesn't even resemble anything plausible, but hey, this is the same guy who gave us Nightcat. Originally, Stan Lee actually wanted to call the book "The Mutants", or according to Wikipedia, "The Merry Mutants". Fortunately, Marvel's publisher Mark Goodman put the kibosh on that, since the name doesn't exactly have staying power and no one would understand it from just glancing at it. Well, the guy might have been wrong about Spider-Man, but at least he knows names. Instead, Lee went with "X-Men", because they had something extra about them.
Linkara: You know, with Stan Lee, you really sometimes can't tell when he's kidding or when he's dead serious. And really, you don't want to know. Point is, let's dig into the first story of the Merry Mutants, "The X-Men #1".
(Opening titles play; title card has the theme for X-Men: The Animated Series playing over it; cut to a closeup of the comic's cover)
Linkara (v/o): Unlike in the last few origins stories, "X-Men" started off with its own title and a full story. Our cover today is crowded but well-placed. There are four taglines on this thing, but they're all positioned so they don't interrupt the action.
Text: The strangest super-heroes of all!
Linkara: I mean, yellow and black uniforms? Who wears that?
Text: In the sensational Fantastic Four style!
Linkara: In that there are more than four heroes, and they were born with their powers instead of gaining them by accident, and really, they have nothing to do with the Fantastic Four.
Linkara (v/o): I love how all of this is put together. We have four superheroes attacking Magneto – well, five, but Jean Grey is just wobbling back there on the uneven ground – who is drawn in a way so that he looks like he's got devil horns and is painted red. The Beast is swinging down from... somewhere. Cyclops is blasting Magneto with his laser eyes, though how Magneto is stopping them is another matter for scientists to debate over. Angel is carrying what looks like a bazooka – and doing a poor job of it, since he looks like he's going to topple over. And finally, there's Iceman.
(Cut to a clip of Top Gun)
Iceman (Val Kilmer): (to Maverick) You can be my wingman any time.
(Back to the comic)
Linkara (v/o): ...who is throwing snowballs. Yes, the strangest superheroes of all. Some fight crime with advanced technology, some with laser eyes, and then some throw snowballs at their foe.
Linkara: For those keeping score, I once again have a reprint. (holds it up) This time, "Marvel Masterworks Presents the X-Men Vol. 1". It collects the first ten issues of the book... aaaand I don't know if it's in print anymore, since I got this one from the used book section of the store.
Linkara (v/o): We open to Professor Xavier at his school.
Narrator: In the main study of an exclusive private school in New York's Westchester County, a strange silent man sits motionless, brooding...alone with his indescribable thoughts...
Linkara: (looking up; thinking) I wonder if I used jello as a toothpaste, I could turn my teeth green...
Narrator: Finally, his meditation comes to an end! Then, while he remains completely motionless, a sharp, commanding THOUGHT rings out, echoing through the great halls of the building!
Linkara: (thinking) Has anyone seen the TV remote? I fell asleep, and now it's not here.
Linkara (v/o): Prof. X calls the X-Men to him to announce that class is in session. Four X-Men all appear and loudly announce that they're there. Strangest of all is Iceman, who apparently swings down on a pole of ice... that appears from absolutely nowhere. Was he just in the room this whole time and he's just spinning around on it for kicks? Speaking of kicks, if the rest of his body is ice and snow, why the hell is he wearing boots?
Cyclops: C'mon, Angel, let's tilt the Professor's chair back and make him more comfortable!
Angel: With pleasure, Cyclops, old man! We want the Professor comfortable while he puts us through our paces!
Linkara: Wow! I can't even begin to quantify how creepy this panel is.
Linkara (v/o): I mean, what, they're attending on the immensely powerful psychic without him even asking? I mean, tilting his chair back and adjusting his blanket? Maybe the X-Men aren't so much a superhero team as much as assisted living attendants. Iceman wants to show Beast a new trick with his frosting power, which basically consists of putting snow on his arms. Really useful there, Iceman; your future career as a flocking gun is assured. Beast is pissed about it, but Angel stops them before they can get into a fight.
Angel: Hold it, lads! No fighting during class, remember?
Linkara: (as Angel) Severely irritating your classmates is fine, though.
Linkara (v/o): By the way, was Prof. X just sitting in a completely empty room, except for the chair? I only ask because the room always looks empty no matter what angle we see it from, and he suddenly commands them to start their lessons... and a big computer console and other equipment just appear out of nowhere!
Prof. X: (thinking) Allow me to congratulate all of you! You are receiving my thoughts perfectly! Soon, there will be no need for me to speak aloud to you at all!
Linkara: (as Prof. X; thinking) My telepathy will ensure that none of you has a moment's privacy!
Linkara (v/o): Beast begins his training.
Prof. X: (thinking) Excellent! Now spin around! Faster! Faster!
Linkara: (as Prof. X; thinking and shaking up his fist) Faster, damn you, FASTER!
Prof. X: (thinking) Pretend an enemy is shooting at you! You must make yourself an impossible target!
Linkara: (trying to aim his magic gun) Damn, a big, blurry, spinning thing! I can't hope to hit that!
Linkara (v/o): So, after Beast finishes his routine, it's Angel's turn.
Prof. X: (thinking) Now, be sharp... today we test your wing reflex! You dare not make a mistake!
Linkara: Geez, no wonder they pamper Prof. X. Who knows what kind of screwed-up stuff he does if they piss him off!
Linkara (v/o): Oh, he actually means that Angel needs to fly around a flame jet, crushers, spinning blades, and a sound concussion! Are these all in this tiny little room? And why the hell is he testing stuff this dangerous on them?! I mean, yes, they are superheroes and all, but maybe you ought to make them a little less lethal!
Linkara: (as a member of the school's Board of Directors) Ah, Professor Xavier, I'm glad you could join us once again. (looks at a piece of paper) We've been looking at these expense reports... (as Prof. X) Look, I can explain the wheel of death and the chompers. I felt that my students needed more encouragement to do their homework! (as board member) ...Actually, we were going to ask you about the vending machines and the nutrition of your students... Spinning wheel of death, you say? (as Prof. X) Umm... Er... Ooh... (looks away, feeling embarrassed)
Linkara (v/o): Iceman wants to know when he'll get his chance to brave the chompers and the other tests, but the Professor instead tells him to go along and play like a good little kid. Iceman decides to imitate a snowman, because that's a surefire way to show that you're mature enough to have flame jets fired in your face. After a little test of his reflexes by throwing a bowling ball at him, Cyclops is left.
Prof. X: (thinking) Assume The Beast and Iceman are your enemies! Put them out of action, without causing serious injury!
Linkara (v/o): Cyclops proceeds to BLAST Beast so hard that he becomes embedded in the wall, and his skin fried!
(Cut to a clip of Salute Your Shorts)
Bobby Budnick (Danny Cooksey): You are roasted...
Eddie "Donkeylips" Gelfen (Michael Bower): ...toasted...
Bobby and Eddie: (in unison) ...and burnt to a crisp!
(Back to the comic again)
Linkara (v/o): Iceman shields himself in a big ice cube. Naturally, Cyclops just shoots through it. Xavier tells them to start beating up Cyclops for a few minutes... Such a wise and noble teacher... before finally telling them to cut it out.
Prof. X: (thinking) And now I shall return to normal speech communication!
Linkara: Dear Lord, Xavier, you were weird in the '60s!
Prof. X: (speaking) You may be interested to learn that at this very moment I sense a taxi approaching our main gate! Within that vehicle is a new pupil...a most attractive young lady!
Cyclops: (as he and the others look out the window) You're right, sir! Wow! She's a real living doll!
Angel: A redhead! Look at that face...and the rest of her!
Linkara: (laughs uproariously) This is one seriously screwed-up school!
Linkara (v/o): Turns out the new student is Jean Grey.
Jean: What kind of school is this, sir? I have a right to know!
Prof. X: I think you already suspect, Miss Grey! You see, I can read your thoughts quite clearly... and I know all about your unusual "talent"!
Linkara: (irritably) Does the concept of privacy even begin to enter your bald, oversized head, you weirdo?!
Linkara (v/o): Prof. X introduces her to the only four other students in the entire school – Yes, I'm serious. – and vice-versa.
Prof. X: This is Miss Jean Grey! She will be known as Marvel Girl!
Linkara: (as Prof. X) And no, she doesn't get a choice in the matter.
Linkara (v/o): Oh, yeah, and it turns out Cyclops' real name isn't Scott Summers, but Slim Summers. Oh, yeah, and everybody is acting like a horny jackrabbit around her. Jean Grey demonstrates her powers by telekinetically moving a chair and a book around.
Jean: Now, I must admit it's a pleasure to be able to practice teleportation openly, without fear of being discovered!
Linkara: Wait, she can teleport, too?
Jean: By the power of thought, I am able to move objects at will!
Linkara (v/o): Yeah, I guess in the '60s, given the etymology of the word, teleportation and telekinesis would be the same thing, but that's still really stupid. Prof. Xavier explains the premise of the series, that mutants are mistrusted by normal humans... Really? Why? ...and he established the school to benefit all of mankind. Xavier leaves to let them all get acquainted, which is naturally the signal for Beast to start pawing her. Jean uses her "teleportation" to spin around and toss him onto a couch. Despite saying he was going to leave, Xavier is still around and exposits that further about how there are evil mutants who want to dominate the world! Conveniently, we then switch to Magneto making a nefarious scheme to, well, dominate the world. Some sort of rocket is being launched, and Magneto, in a show of power, uses his powerful mastery of magnetism to cause the rocket to lose altitude and drop into the sea. We get a brief scene of a newspaper reporting the incident: "SIXTH TOP SECRET LAUNCHING FAILS AT SEA!"
Linkara: If it's top secret, then how does the newspaper know about it?
Linkara (v/o): Magneto, continuing to use his powers, takes control of machine guns and tanks to terrorize military bases.
Soldier: RUN! The tank is moving by itself!
Linkara: (as soldier) Oh, God, it's Killdozer all over again!
Soldier: General! Look! Above us...in the sky!
Linkara: (as soldier) It's Superman, sir! He'll save us!... Oh... He's busy terrorizing lobbyists... Never mind, sir.
Linkara (v/o): Magneto takes control of the dust particles in the air, which I guess are metal now, and forms them into a message to the base, ordering their surrender. I especially love how he signed his name in cursive like that, like he was writing a letter or something.
Soldier: Magneto? Who...What is Magneto??
Linkara: (as General (Patton, no doubt)) I don't know, soldier, but he's got damn fine penmanship.
Linkara (v/o): Anyway, Magneto shows up at the base, and of course, everyone tries to shoot him, but the guns don't work, and he just walks through the men.
Magneto: Now I'll merely alter my magnetic waves from positive to negative, so that they will repel anything that comes within range!
(Cut to the Mystery Science Theater 3000 gang watching This Island Earth)
Mike Nelson: And if your hands were metal, that would mean something.
(Back to the comic again)
Linkara (v/o): Meanwhile, back at the Institute of Maiming and Leering, Jean Grey is putting on her Marvel Girl costume. Naturally, the men were spying on her and making perverted remarks. Prof. X calls them in to alert them of Magneto's attack on the base.
Prof. X: A crisis has occurred at Cape Citadel which leads me to believe the first of the evil mutants has made his appearance! This will be your baptism of fire!
Linkara: (dumbfounded) Wait, what?!
Prof. X: This will be your baptism of fire!
Linkara: Okay, admittedly, upon doing some research, the phrase refers to a soldier's first experience in battle, but was this in the brochure?! "Xavier's School for the Gifted! Let them experience a baptism of fire"?!?
Linkara (v/o): The X-Men suit up and head out in a jet.
Jean/Marvel Girl: You mean the Professor is guiding this plane from the ground... by thought impulses?! It's unbelievable!
Linkara (v/o): Yes, yes, it is. His powers do not work like that. Anyway, the X-Men arrive and offer their services to the military trying to break in. Cyclops negotiates with the General to give his team fifteen minutes to head in and stop Magneto. Iceman breezes past some soldiers, half-freezing them to death, Beast plays leapfrog on a soldier, and Marvel Girl telekinetically shoves soldiers aside so she can get in.
Linkara: Maybe if Prof. X taught classes on how to not be complete assholes instead of flying through the wheel of death, mutant-human relations would be a lot better.
Linkara (v/o): Cyclops uses his laser eyes to get through Magneto's magnetic shield.
Cyclops: I'm getting through! That's what was needed...a natural counterforce to batter the unnatural magnetic field!
Linkara (v/o): I'll just pretend that that was in some ways scientific and just move on.
Cyclops: And now, I'll switch to MAXIMUM POWER!
Linkara (v/o): Oh, could it be? Why, yes! We are experiencing... (the following words pop up...) POWERHOUSE EXCITEMENT! Anyway, yeah, they get through the field, though Cyclops knocked himself out with the full force of his blasts. Magneto releases five interceptor missiles that he says will track them by body heat. Why exactly they track their body heat and not anyone else's, or how he thinks that they all won't go for the same target is left up to our imagination, I guess. Angel manages to dodge the missiles, and Iceman uses his powers to ice up the missiles and drop them to the ground. I still think this would cause them to explode, but what do I know? Angel tries going right for Magneto, but he uses every metallic object in the area to slow him down. Cyclops blasts through the debris, and Magneto sends a flaming tanker of rocket fuel at them. Now, I want to critique this, but I got mixed responses on Twitter when I asked about it. Most people said the tanker would indeed explode, but it was varying opinions about what was actually causing the explosion and how long it would take for it to explode. So once again, a classic comic manages to get away with this. However, I still say Iceman probably could have put out the flames instead of what they do to protect themselves, which is to wrap themselves in a nice, big snow-and-ice shield from the explosion.
Linkara: Well, at least they won't be hot when they incinerate! (beat) Wait...
Linkara (v/o): Magneto thinks they're dead, but the X-Men quickly emerge from underground, Cyclops having apparently created a tunnel for them with his energy beams. Yeah, we'll just pretend that he had enough time to do that before everything exploded, or that the tunnel would protect them somehow. Magneto flies away and creates a magnetic force field to keep them back. They eventually breach it, but Magneto's long gone by the time they do. The X-Men return to the military and tell them that the base is theirs again. The General thanks Cyclops and tells him that the name of the X-Men will be revered for what they have done. Yeah, I'm sure the X-Men will never face prejudice for their actions and activities. And so, our comic ends with the giant floating head of Professor Xavier in the clouds congratulating them on a job well done. Yeah, lots of stuff blew up, the villain got away, and many people are probably dead, but hey, could have been worse. This comic astounds me. The stuff with Magneto is actually really good superhero action, fighting the bad guy, etc., etc. The stuff at the mansion with the X-Men training or being creepy, however, is just awful and disturbing. Let us never speak of it again, except as call-back jokes in future reviews.
Linkara: (holds up index finger) Oh, you want some more added creepiness to the whole thing? In a later issue, Professor Xavier admits to himself that he's as much of a horny idiot as the students, but he knows the wheelchair thing is a complete turn-off for Jean Grey.
Prof. X: (thinking) As though I could help worrying about the one I love! But I can never tell her! I have no right! Not while I'm the leader of the X-Men, and confined to this wheelchair!
Linkara: (as Prof. X, holding X-Men comic) And like so many problems, the solution is smoking. (sighs; normal) Geez, I don't think I can take another week of origin stories after (holds up comic) this one. (waves dismissively) Screw this! Next week, we're reviewing "Brute Force"! (throws down comic, gets up and leaves)
(End credits roll to the theme for the X-Men cartoon series)
I know there wasn't much of an "origin" for this one, buuuut hey, first appearances of Jean Grey and Magneto. That has to count for something.
So ends Secret Origins Month! Everyone seemed to really like it, so we'll probably do it again next year!
(Stinger: Linkara is seen working on his device again; he looks up)
Linkara: Hmm? What's that? You wanted to know my secret origins for this month? Well... maybe some other time. (resumes his work)
|Atop the Fourth Wall Transcripts
||The Top 15 WTF Moments in Comics · US-1 1 · Doom's IV 2 · Superman At Earth's End · Sinnamon 11 · Batman 147
||Spider-Man 56 · Godzilla Vs. Barkley · Titans 1 · Uncanny X-Men 423 · Uncanny X-Men 424 · S.C.I. Spy 1 · Mr. T and the T-Force 1 · Star Trek comic 1 · Newmen 1 · NFL Superpro 1 · Neutro 1 · Amazons Attack Prologue · Amazons Attack 1 and 2 · Amazons Attack 3 and 4 · Amazons Attack 5 and 6 · Sultry Teenage Super-Foxes 1 · Top 15 Worst Heroes Becoming Villains · Daredevil 305 · Daredevil 306 · Blue Beetle Tribute · World of Warcraft 2 and 3 · Captain Planet and the Planeteers 3 · Wolverine: Adamantium Rage · Youngblood 1 · New Guardians 2 · The Marriage of Hercules and Xena · Secret Defenders 9 · Secret Defenders 10 · Superman vs Terminator 1 · Countdown Prologue · Countdown Part 1 · Countdown Part 2 · Top 15 Worst Moments of Countdown · Xena 1 · Cable 1 · Law and Order 1 · Batman: Fortunate Son · Air Raiders 1 · Nightcat 1 · Zero Patrol 1 · Blood Pack 1 · Mickey Mantle 2 · Adventures of the Kool-Aid Man 1 · Silent Hill: Dying Inside 1 and 2 · Silent Hill: Dying Inside 3 and 4 · Silent Hill: Dying Inside 5 · Maximum Clonage · 22 Brides 1 · All-Star Batman and Robin 1 and 2 · Doom 1 · Spider-Man, Storm and Cage · Bimbos in Time · The Dark Knight Strikes Again Part 1 · Extreme Super Christmas Special 1 · James Bond, Jr. 3 · Top 15 Missed Opportunities of AT4W
||Pitt 1 · Scarlett comic 1 · Future Five 1 · Ultimates 3 1 and 2 · Ultimates 3 3 and 4 · Ultimates 3 5 · Youngblood 2 · Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers 1 · Strange Adventures 136 · Doom's IV 1/2 · X-Men comic 1 · Darker Image 1 · The Dark Knight Strikes Again Part 2 · Sultry Teenage Super-Foxes 2 · Star Trek/X-Men 1 · Athena 1 · JLA - Act of God Part 1 · JLA - Act of God Part 2 · JLA - Act of God Part 3 · Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Meet Archie · Lunatik 1 · Chuck Norris Karate Kommandos 1 · AT4W & Spoony: Experiment Warrior 2-3 · The Dark Knight Strikes Again Part 3 · Tandy Computer Whiz Kids: Fit to Win · Anita Blake: The Laughing Corpse 1-2 · Freak Force 1 · Chain Gang War 1 · Ewoks 9 · Cable 2 · The California Raisins 3-D 2 · Hardcore Station 1 · The Others 1 and Brute Force 1 · Amazing Spider-Man: Skating on Thin Ice 1 · Star Trek Voyager: Elite Force · Action Comics 592 · Action Comics 593 · Top 15 Comics I'll Never Review · 100th Episode · Nolan Ryan 1 · Transformers comics 4-5 · Silent Hill: Dead/Alive 1 and 2 · Silent Hill: Dead/Alive 3 and 4 · Silent Hill: Dead/Alive 5 · Spider-Man: The Greatest Responsibility · Action Comics 1 · Amazing Fantasy 15 · Detective Comics 27 · The X-Men 1 · Brute Force 2 · New Kids on the Block 4 · Marvel Team Up 127 · Santa Claus Conquers the Martians · Top 15 Screw-Ups of Atop the Fourth Wall
||Justice League: Cry for Justice 1-2 · Justice League: Cry for Justice 3-4 · Power Rangers Zeo 1 · Justice League: Cry for Justice 5-7 · Care Bears 13 · Superman: Distant Fires · Youngblood 3 · Doctor Who Classics 7 · Spider-Man and the Fantastic Four in... Brain Drain! · KISS Comics · Superman and Wonder Woman: Tandy Computer Whiz Kids · Spawn 1 · X-Force 1 · The Backstreet Project 1 · All-Star Batman and Robin 3 and 4 · Lady Gaga 1 · Star Trek: The Motion Picture 1-3 · The Godyssey 1 · Superman Meets the Quik Bunny · Ultimate Warrior's Workout · Ultimatum 1-2 · Ultimatum 3-4 · Ultimatum 5 · SCI-Spy 2 · Miller Time: Batman/Spawn · Gameboy 1 · Eminem and the Punisher 1 · Barbi Twin Adventures 1 · Rise of Arsenal 1-2 · Rise of Arsenal 3-4 · Comic Book Advertisements · Star Trek 2 (Gold Key) · PSA Hell: Captain America: Return of the Asthma Monster! · NBComics 1 · Mightily Murdered Power Ringers 1 · Kamandi at Earth's End 1 · US-1 2 · Twilight Zone 9 · Superman and the TRS-80 Whiz Kids: The Computers that Saved Metropolis! · Street Fighter 1 (Malibu) · Silent Hill: Paint It Black · Silent Hill: Among the Damned · Silent Hill: The Grinning Man · Spider-Man: Planet of the Symbiotes · Pokémon - The Electric Tale of Pikachu · All-Star Comics 8 · The Fantastic Four 1 · All-American Comics 16 · Captain America Comics 1 · Star Trek: The Wrath of Khan 1 · Star Trek: The Wrath of Khan 2 · Star Trek: The Wrath of Khan 3 · Top 15 Personal Favorite Jokes of AT4W
||Marville 1 · Miller Time: Robocop vs. the Terminator 1 · Brute Force 3 · 15 Things That Are Wrong With Identity Crisis · New Guardians 1 · Gameboy 2 · Youngblood 4 · Star Trek III: The Search for Spock · Mr. T 1 (AP Comics) · Mr. T 2 · The Amazing Spider-Man and Captain America in Dr. Doom's Revenge! · The Invincible Four of Kung-Fu & Ninja 1 · Kamandi at Earth's End 2 · Black Web 1 · Transformers: Generation 2 1 · Captain Tax Time 1 · Superman 701 · Bloodstrike 1 · Marville 2 · The Amazing Spider-Man on Bullying Prevention 1 · The New Teen Titans Anti-Drug Giveaway 1 · Daredevil vs Vapora 1 · Batman: A Word to the Wise · Marvel Team-Up 74 · Blake's 7 2 · Battle for Bludhaven 1-2 · Battle for Bludhaven 3-4 · Battle for Bludhaven 5-6 · Sir Charles Barkley and the Referee Murders · Captain Electron 1 · Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home · 200th Episode · Rock 'N Roll 31 · Future Shock 1 · Catwoman: Guardian of Gotham 1 · Catwoman: Guardian of Gotham 2 · Psychoman 1 · Marville 3 · Tandy Computer Whiz Kids: The Answer to a Riddle · Batman: Jazz 1 · Starstream 1 · The Thing From Another World 1 · The Thing From Another World 2 · Spider-Man: Power and Responsibility · Bart Simpson's Treehouse of Horror 2 · Flash Comics 1 · Tales of Suspense 39 · The Brave and the Bold 54 · The Incredible Hulk 1 · Superman's Christmas Adventure · Archie Giant Series Magazine 452 · Teen Titans 13: A Swingin' Christmas Carol · Batman: Noel · The Next 15 Screw-Ups of Atop the Fourth Wall
||Kamandi at Earth's End 3 · Raver 1 · Transformers 31 · Happy Days 2 · All-Star Batman and Robin 5 · Youngblood 5 · Star Wars 3-D 1 · Marville #4 · Titans Retrospective: Team History · Titans Retrospective: JLA/Titans: The Technis Imperative · Titans Retrospective: Titans 1-25 · Titans Retrospective: Titans 26-50 · Frankenstein Meets the Space Monster · Power Pachyderms 1 · Star Trek V: The Final Frontier · Dragnet 4 · Wild Thing 1 · Spider-Man 2099 1 · Punisher 2099 1 · Doom 2099 1 · Ravage 2099 1 · Comic Book Quickies 1 · Kamandi at Earth's End 4 · SCI-Spy 3 · Star Trek: The Next Generation/X-Men 1 · Mr. T and the T-Force 2 · Miller Time: All-Star Batman and Robin 6 · Tandy Computer Whiz Kids: A Deadly Choice · Battlestar Galactica: Journey's End 1 · Marville 5 · Miller Time: Tales to Offend 1 · The Culling: Teen Titans Annual 1 · The Culling: Superboy 9 · The Culling: Legion Lost 9 · The Culling: Teen Titans 9 · Plan 9 From Outer Space: 30 Years Later 1 · Brute Force 4 · Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country · SCI-Spy 4 · The Thing From Another World: Climate of Fear 1-2 · The Thing From Another World: Climate of Fear 3-4 · Spider-Man: Crossfire · 2001: A Space Odyssey 1 · Showcase 4 · Tales to Astonish 27 · Showcase 22 · Journey into Mystery 83 · The Punisher: Silent Night 1 · Solson Christmas Special featuring Samurai Santa 1 · Star Trek: The Next Generation 2 · Doctor Who Classic Comics 15 · The Next 15 Missed Opportunities of AT4W
||Marville 6-7 · Comic Book Quickies 2 · Miller Time: All-Star Batman and Robin 7 · Preparedness 101: A Zombie Pandemic · Gameboy 3 · US-1 3 · Youngblood 6 · Star Trek: Generations · The A-Team 1 · The Wild 1 · Kamandi at Earth's End 5 · Nova Girls: Kissing Canvas · Avengers 200 · SCI-Spy 5 · Red Hood and the Outlaws 1 · Athena 2 · Bill and Ted's Excellent Comic Book 1 · Zolastraya and the Bard 1 · PSA Hell: Superman: For the Animals 1 · Chuck Norris: Karate Kommandos 2 · Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers: The Movie 1 · Speed Steer 5 · Batman: Jazz 2 · 2001: A Space Odyssey 2 · Comic Book Quickies 3 · 300th Episode · 300th Episode: Part 2 · 300th Episode: Part 3 · Godzilla: Kingdom of Monsters 1 · Batman: Shadow of the Bat 56 · Sinnamon 1 · US-1 4 · The Adventures of Jell-O Man and Wobbly 1 · Miller Time: All-Star Batman and Robin 8 · Tandy Computer Whiz Kids: The Computer That Said No to Drugs · Marvel Super Special 17 · SCI-Spy 6 · Kamandi at Earth's End 6 · Sonic Super Special 7 · Star Trek: First Contact · Cosmic Slam 1 · The Thing from Another World: Eternal Vows 1-2 · The Thing from Another World: Eternal Vows 3-4 · The Thing from Another World: Questionable Research · Spider-Man: The Trial of Peter Parker · Whiz Comics 2 · Tales to Astonish 44 · Detective Comics 38 · The Avengers 1 · The Hobbit 1 · The Hobbit 2 · The Hobbit 3 · Santa the Barbarian 1 · Top 15 Worst Comics I've Reviewed
||Miller Time: All-Star Batman and Robin 9 · Godzilla: Kingdom of Monsters 2 · Trouble 1 · Comic Book Quickies 4 · PSA Hell: Energy and Safety with the Justice League · Youngblood 7 · ROMTROSPECTIVE: ROM Spaceknight 1-40 · ROMTROSPECTIVE: ROM Spaceknight 41-75 · The Star Wars 1 · Batman: Jazz 3 · Mr. T and the T-Force 3 · Big Bang Presents 3: Protoplasman! · Crimson 1 · Vampire: The Masquerade - Bloodlines (RPG Game) · Titans: Scissors, Paper, Stone · PSA Hell: Batman: Shadow of the Bat 57 · Comic Book Quickies 5 · Avengers Assemble Featuring Captain Citrus 1 · Doctor Who/Star Trek: The Next Generation: Assimilation Squared · My Cage · The Punisher 60 · The Punisher 61 & 62 · Steam Wars · Ultimate Power 1-2 · Homestuck, Act 1 · Atomic Robo, Vol. 3 · Just Imagine Stan Lee Creating Superman · Just Imagine Stan Lee Creating Batman · Just Imagine Stan Lee Creating Wonder Woman · Just Imagine Stan Lee Creating The Flash · Zyuranger Episodes 17-22 · Tandy Computer Whiz Kids: The Computer Trap · Trouble 2 · Pokémon Reburst, Chapter 1 · Green Lantern 23.1 · Team Youngblood 1 · US-1 5 · The Star Wars 2 · Power Man and Iron Fist 79 · Nightmares on Elm Street 1-2 · Nightmares on Elm Street 3-4 · Nightmares on Elm Street 5-6 · Spider-Man: Virtual Mortality · More Fun Comics 73 · Daredevil 1 · Action Comics 252 · Tales of Suspense 52 · Atop the Fourth Wall: The Movie, Part 1 · Atop the Fourth Wall: The Movie, Part 2 · Atop the Fourth Wall: The Movie, Part 3 · Atop the Fourth Wall: The Movie, Part 4 · Atop the Fourth Wall: The Movie, Part 5 · Deadpool Bi-Annual 1 · Cho Dengeki Stryker · Zombies Christmas Carol 1-3 · Zombies Christmas Carol 4-5 · Another 15 Missed Opportunities of AT4W
||NFL SuperPro Special Edition 1 · Popeye: Borned to the Sea 1 · OnStar Batman Auto Show Special Edition 1 · Godzilla: Kingdom of Monsters 3 · The Star Wars 3 · Youngblood 8 · All-Star Batman and Robin 10 · Pokémon Adventures Ch. 1-2 · Kaizoku Sentai Gokaiger Episodes 1-5 · Blue-Skying, Part 1: Blue Beetle Dan Garrett · Blue-Skying, Part 2: Blue Beetle Ted Kord · Blue-Skying, Part 3: Blue Beetle Jaime Reyes · Blue-Skying, Part 4: Blue Beetle Jaime Reyes New 52 · Star Trek Special: Flesh and Stone · Blackest Night 1-8 · Dart 1 · Batman: Shadow of the Bat 58 · The Legend of Heroes: Trails in the Sky · Ultimate Power 3 · Star Trek: The Next Generation 3 · Comic Book Quickies 6 · 400th Episode · 400th Episode: Part 2 · Superman vs. the Amazing Spider-Man · Titans/Young Justice: Graduation Day 1 · Titans/Young Justice: Graduation Day 2 · Titans/Young Justice: Graduation Day 3 · 15 Things Wrong With Marvel's Civil War · Star Trek: Deep Space Nine 1 · The Minister of Chance · US-1 6 · Star Trek: Voyager 1 · Unsounded, Chapter 1 · Biggles and the Menace from Space · Batman and Robin: The Official Comic Adaptation · Superman and the TRS-80 Computer Whiz Kids: Victory by Computer · Star Trek/Green Lantern: The Spectrum War · My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic 27-28 · Yu-Gi-Oh! GX Ch. 1 · Pryde of the X-Men · A Nightmare on Elm Street: Paranoid 1 · A Nightmare on Elm Street: Paranoid 2 · A Nightmare on Elm Street: Paranoid 3 · Spider-Man: Cyberwar · The Real Ghostbusters in Ghostbusters II 1-3 · Strange Tales 110 · More Fun Comics 73: Aquaman · Tales of Suspense 57 · All-Star Comics 3 · My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic 2015 Holiday Special · Ghostbusters: Past, Present, and Future · Elvira's House of Mystery Special 1 · Another 15 Screw-Ups of AT4W
||Digimon: Digital Monsters 1 · Phonogram: The Immaterial Girl 1-6 · Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 1 · Trouble 3 · The Star Wars 4 · Spectacular Spider-Man Episode 1x10 - "Persona" · Youngblood 9 · The A-Team 2 · The Batman/Superman Movie: World's Finest · See You Next Mirror: Exiles Retrospective, Part 1 · See You Next Mirror: Exiles Retrospective, Part 2 · Reagan's Raiders 1 · Fist of the North Star, Ch. 1 · Godzilla: Kingdom of Monsters 4 · Iron Man: The Animated Series - The Wedding of Iron Man · Athena 3 · Batman: The Dark Knight 1-3 · The New Teen Titans Anti-Drug Giveaway 2 · Crisis on Infinite Earths · Secret Wars (1984) · The Infinity Gauntlet · Flashpoint · Babylon 5 1 · The Star Wars 5 · All-New Ghost Rider, Volume 2 · Robocop vs. the Terminator 2 · Superman vs. the Terminator 2 · Tandy Computer Whiz Kids: News By Computer Foils Kidnappers · Ultimate Power 4 · Delicious in Dungeon, Vol. 1 · Batman: Odyssey 1 · Asterix: The Legionary · Comic Book Quickies 7 · JoJo's Bizarre Adventures Episodes 1-4 (2012-2013 series) · Thunderbirds Are Go · Batman: The Official Movie Adaptation · Ultimate Iron Man Vol. 1 1-2 · My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic 11-12 · Stormwatch 0 · A Nightmare on Elm Street: The Beginning 1-2 · A Nightmare on Elm Street: Fearbook · New Line Cinema's Tales of Horror 1 · The Sensational Spider-Man 0 · Freddy vs. Jason vs. Ash · Marvel Comics 1 · Brave and the Bold 28 · Kamen Rider Fourze Episodes 1-4 · Clive Barker's Hellraiser Dark Holiday Special · Sensation Comics 14: The Story of Fir Balsam · Steam Wars Holiday Special · Christmas with the Superheroes 2
||My Top 15 Favorite Episodes of AT4W · Legion of Superheroes: The Great Darkness Saga · James Bond, Jr. 1 · JLA/Avengers · Homestuck, Act 2 · Isaac Asimov's I-Bots 1 · Thunderstrike 1 · Youngblood 10 · Badrock 1A · Event Comics Month II: Infinite Crisis · Event Comics Month II: Infinity War · Event Comics Month II: World War Hulk · Event Comics Month II: Final Crisis · Power Rangers Turbo vs. Beetleborgs Metallix 1 · Diesel 1 · Teen Titans: "Betrayal" and "Aftershock, Parts 1 and 2" · The Punisher: Purgatory · Comic Book Quickies 8 · 500th Episode · Dark Knight III: The Master Race 1-2 · Just Imagine Stan Lee Creating Green Lantern · The New Guardians 3 · US-1 7 · Nova Girls: Space 34-24-34 · Batman: Odyssey 2 · Star Wars 3-D 2 · Pokémon - The Electric Tale of Pikachu 3 · PSA Hell: Captain America Meets the Asthma Monster · Superman and Spider-Man · Amazing Cow Heroes 4: Cold Cuts · Ravage 2099 2 · Adventures of the Kool-Aid Man 2 · Tandy Computer Whiz Kids: Safeguarding the Environment · Mr. T and the T-Force 4 · Star Trek 2 (DC) · Star Trek (2009): The Official Motion Picture Adaptation · Star Trek: The Next Generation 4 · Star Trek 1 (Gold Key) · Silent Hill: Hunger · The Thing: The Northern Nightmare · Freddy vs. Jason vs. Ash: The Nightmare Warriors · Spider-Man: Smoke and Mirrors · Hellraiser: Hell on Earth · Fantastic Four 52 · Marvel Comics 1 (The Human Torch) · The Incredible Hulk 181 · The New Mutants 98 · Batman Returns: The Official Comic Adaptation · The Punisher: Red X-Mas · Star Wars: The Force Awakens Comic Adaptation · Luke Cage, Hero for Hire 7
||Yet Another 15 Missed Opportunities of AT4W · Godzilla: Kingdom of Monsters 5 · Batman/Aliens 1 · Phineas and Ferb: Mission Marvel · Pokémon 15x19-20 "Cilan Takes Flight" and "An Amazing Aerial Battle" · Tomb Raider Vol. 3: Queen of Serpents · Little Victory: Chimera 1 · Youngblood 0 · Kickers, Inc. 1 · The Savage Dragon 1 · Darkwing Duck 1-4 · The California Raisins 3-D 5 · Hellstar Remina, Ch. 1-3 · Gallery of Horrors · Batman: The Dark Knight 16-17 · Tremors · Ultimate Power 5-6 · Batman Forever: The Official Comic Adaptation · Street Fighter: The Official Comic Adaptation · Catwoman: The Official Comic Adaptation · Dune: The Official Comic Adaptation · Superman IV: The Quest for Peace Movie Special · Justice is Silent: Cassandra Caintrospective, Part 1 · Justice is Silent: Cassandra Caintrospective, Part 2 · Justice is Silent: Cassandra Caintrospective, Part 3 · US-1 8 · Tandy Computer Whiz Kids: Community Action Program · Captain America Goes to War Against Drugs · Comic Book Swimsuit Issues · Batman 45-47: The Gift · Star Trek: The Next Generation 5 · The A-Team 3 · JoJo's Bizarre Adventures Episodes 5-9 · Trouble 4 · Franken Fran, Ch. 1 and 4 · Youngblood: Judgment Day · Teen Titans 27-28 · Clive Barker's Hellraiser 1 · Clive Barker's Hellraiser Summer Special · Clive Barker's Hellraiser Spring Slaughter · Spider-Man: The Exile Returns · Detective Comics 225 (Martian Manhunter) · Batman: Harley Quinn 1 · DC Comics Presents 26 · The Flash 123 · Evil Dead 2: A Merry Deadmite X-Mas · Transformers (UK) 145 · The All-New Batman: The Brave and the Bold 14 · Star Wars: The Last Jedi Comic Adaptation
||Top 15 Dumbest Evil Plans of AT4W · Batman/Aliens 2 · Star vs. the Forces of Evil: Deep Trouble 1-4 · Megamind · Revolution · Superman vs. Muhammad Ali · Hellstar Remina, Ch. 4-6 · Youngblood: Strikefile 1 · Comic Book Quickies 9 · Black Panther, Vol. 4 1-6 · Batman: Odyssey 3 · Justice League/Mighty Morphin Power Rangers · The Champions, Vol. 3 1-4: Beat the Devil · Star Trek vs. Transformers · Athena 4 · Daredevil: Born Again · Action Comics 775 · Comic Book Quickies 10 · 600th Episode · Star Wars: The Phantom Menace Comic Adaptation · Star Wars: Attack of the Clones Comic Adaptation · Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith Comic Adaptation · Star Wars: Rogue One Comic Adaptation · DC Challenge! 1 · Kyoryu Sentai Zyurangers Episodes 40-43 · Trouble 5 · Dan Dare: Voyage to Venus · Superman 358 · Zero Hour: Crisis in Time · House of M · Secret Empire · Heroes in Crisis · Animax 1 · Ninjutsu 1-2 · Green Goblin 1-2, 4, 8, 12-13 · US-1 9 · Emergency! 1 · Mr. T and the T-Force 5 · Pinhead 1-3 · Pinhead 4-6 · Pinhead vs. Marshal Law · Spider-Man: Web of Life · Marvel Super-Heroes 12 (Captain Marvel) · The Flash 110 · The Amazing Spider-Man 129 · Awesome Comics Holiday Special · Transformers (UK) 41 · Solo: A Star Wars Story Comic Adaptation
||Yet Another 15 Screw-Ups of AT4W · Star Trek Book and Record Set: Dinosaur Planet · DC Challenge! 2 · The Mighty Heroes 1 · Justice League 1x01-3: Secret Origins · The Star Wars 6 · The King of Braves GaoGaiGar Ep. 1-4 · Youngblood: Strikefile 2 · Pokémon 15×01-02: "Enter Elesa, Electrifying Gym Leader" & "Dazzling the Nimbasa Gym" · Stanley and his Monster 1-4 · Marvel Than Meets the Eye: The Transformers 1-40 · Marvel Than Meets the Eye: Transformers 41-80 · Marvel Than Meets the Eye: Generation 2 and Regeneration One · Star Trek 9 (Gold Key) · Star Trek/Legion of Superheroes · Mystery Science Theater 3000 1 · Batman: The Dark Knight Returns · Ultimate Power 7-8 · Batman: The Dark Knight 23.4 · Just Imagine Stan Lee Creating Aquaman · Sword Interval: Flashback Arc · PSA Hell: The Amazing Spider-Man: Riot at Robotworld · Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice (Ultimate Edition) · Transformers/Ghostbusters: Ghosts of Cybertron · The New Guardians 4 · Codename: Ninja 1 · Batman: Hush · Kaizoku Sentai Gokaiger Ep. 15-16 · Mr. T and the T-Force 6 · Doom’s IV 1 · Batman and Elmer Fudd & Catwoman and Sylvester and Tweety · Batman: Odyssey 4 · The Dresden Files: Storm Front, Vol. 1 · US-1 10 · Godzilla: Kingdom of Monsters 6 · DC Challenge! 3 · Marvel Super Special 1: KISS · The Ring, Vol. 1 · The Ring, Vol. 2 · Spider-Man: Web of Death · Detective Comics 359 · The X-Men 4 · Batman 1 · Spider-Man Holiday Special 1995 · The Adventures of Chrissie Claus 1 · Christmas Quickies 1 · Still Another 15 Missed Opportunities of AT4W
||Ultimate Power 9 · The Adventures of Superboy 3x05-06 and 4x07-08 · Batman: The Killing Joke Adaptation · Just Imagine Stan Lee Creating the JLA · Chew: Poyo Character Focus · Youngblood: Strikefile 3 · Doctor Who: Logopolis · Armageddon 2001 · Secret Invasion · Civil War II · Dark Nights: Metal · The Star Wars 7 · Sonic the Hedgehog: Tangle and Whisper
||AT4W 2009 Trailer · Linkara's Take on Watchmen · Watchmen Review · Theme Song Contest · The Spoony Experiment: Warrior #1 · Theme Song Contest Winner! · Blackest Night · Silent Hill: Dying Inside Trailer · Silent Hill Alternate Endings · AT4W & Spoony: Experiment Warrior 2-3 · October 2010 Trailer · Silent Hill: Dead/Alive Review Alternate Endings · The Live Show! · AT4W Story Recap · October 2011 Trailer · Return of AT4W Live! · Revenge of the AT4W Live! · Southland Tales · Curse of AT4W Live · House of AT4W Live! · Ghost of AT4W LIVE! · October 2012 Trailers · Bride of AT4W Live! · Son of AT4W Live! · Night of AT4W Live! · Day of AT4W Live! · Dawn of AT4W Live! · Land of AT4W Live! · Diary and Survival of AT4W Live! · Power of AT4W Live! · Midnight of AT4W Live! · Planet of AT4W LIVE! · Genesis of AT4W LIVE! · 300th Episode Livestream Recordings · Destiny of AT4W LIVE! · Resurrection of AT4W LIVE! · Revelation of AT4W Live! · Remembrance of AT4W LIVE! · The New 52 · Atop the Fourth Wall: The Movie, Part 1 · Atop the Fourth Wall: The Movie, Part 2 · Atop the Fourth Wall: The Movie, Part 3 · Atop the Fourth Wall: The Movie, Part 4 · Atop the Fourth Wall: The Movie, Part 5