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The WORST Movies Nostalgia Critic's Reviewed

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Doug (vo): Number eight...''The Cell''. And this goes back to right what I saw saying about ''Moulin Rouge'', a film that thinks it's much more poetic and much more important.
 
Doug (vo): Number eight...''The Cell''. And this goes back to right what I saw saying about ''Moulin Rouge'', a film that thinks it's much more poetic and much more important.
   
Doug: But it's not delivering on it. It-It's sort of delivering on the visuals, which are very interesting, and even, I mean, I guess to some extent, I'll give it some credit for TRYING to go to this really dark area that most movies wouldn't go but it's...it's not smart! And it's not considerate. It's not thinking about what, you know, serial killers really go through and instead, you know, they try to create this visual realm which is so fucking ingenious. I was really hyped to see this movie. Uh, and they create this visual realm that would actually show you what's going on in the person's mind, which is really kinda cool. But's it's mostly just there's a bad guy, just evil in there. And again, when you're just creating a villain that isn't complicated, that isn't, you know, complex and is just, you know, a bad seed, even if it's in the person's mind and I get that. I know they're saying that, you know, well, this person is very complex and here are the complexities, but even the complexities are not complex! They're just, you know, it's a guy with horns going (speaking gravely) "I've killed boy." (normal) You know, just turning into the bug from ''Men in Black''. And for me, the psychology of people that do these terrible things and the film is really trying to dive into these terrible things that this guy does and why he does it, you know, you could say it in two seconds: bad childhood. (snaps his fingers) Done. You know, it doesn't make me experience it really because I never know what he's like as a normal person. I go into the review very deep into that. Uh, why I don't feel sorry for the guy because we just see him as the monster. I think at one point, you see him as a little kid, but tell me. What was he like as a little kid? Really. Wha-what games did he play? Who are his friends? Where, uh, where did he hang out? What did he do as a child? The most they is that he played with dolls and that's just in a line of dialogue. We know NOTHING about this guy. For a film that tries to dive so deep into him, all we ever get out of it is that he was beaten as a child. We get nothing else. One of the worst psychological studies ever. And I appreciate also that it's trying to do it almost all visually. You know, sort of the Stanley Kubrick route where you look at, you know, a script that has all this dialogue. You just rip out half the dialogue and just tell it visually. People who can do that are so inspired and they use the visual medium of film making but this movie did not catch on and it felt...I don't know what the guy was going for or not, but it felt unbelievably exploitive. And not in a fun, oh-ha-ha-ha, like, you know, "No, I'm really gonna take you into the darkest, deepest realms of everything.". But it's...it just feels like, again, you know, he's just shouting "Ask me what it means! I'm complex! I'm tortured! You should look at me and go "Ooh! He's an artist! He understands things that I cannot!"". But it's just, you know...maybe if it was more like the David Lynch route. Now even the story doesn't support that. David Lynch wouldn't have like a machine that goes inside the guy's mind. It would just...just the whole movie would be inside the guy's mind. Like that's going balls all out. You know, but when you get Jennifer Lopez and Vince Vaughn and you have this stylistic world where the cops wear the shades and they look and they obsess over the killers and stuff, I mean it's like, no that's movies. And you're not...but it-it's clichéd Hollywood movies and you're not making the movies, you know...where you're really trying to push the envelope. You know, with the story and the way you're telling the story. You know, I mean, I...honestly, I'd love to see if, you could argue here everybody has, I'd love to see someone like David Lynch do a movie like this, you just take out the cop element. You know, or trying to find someone in time. You just make it where you just go inside a killer's mind. And that's it. And I don't even know if you'd say it was a killer's mind. It could mean anything to anyone. I mean, I'd like...if you're gonna be all interpretive and shit, go all out. Don't put, you know, this concrete story and when you go into the mind, it's like "Ooh, what does it mean? What does it mean?". No, you can't do that. You know, you have to...if you're gonna really be engulfed in a world, you have to engulf the person in the world. You can slowly, you know, move them into it or suck them into it. Again, Kubrick was very good at that. I think Lynch still makes, uh, a, to some extent, is very good at that. But, with a movie like this where here's the machine, you're in the guy's mind, now you're out of the guy's mind and stuff. How much fun would it be if they came out of the person's mind and... they weren't sure. Like if they were out of the mind or if they were not in his mind or if they were in the real world or whatever. Maybe they start hallucinating and stuff like that. How about the after effects of going in the killer's mind? It's like that's...I'm writing a much better movie right now just being angry at it. You know, so, it, just, oh! What you could have done with this movie and, uh, it just came of as this exploitive, artistic, look-at-me pretentious. I know a lot of people who like it. So, if you do, that's just the effect it had on me, that's how it rubbed off on me. I just, ooh, really hate it.
+
Doug: But it's not delivering on it. It-It's sort of delivering on the visuals, which are very interesting, and even, I mean, I guess to some extent, I'll give it some credit for TRYING to go to this really dark area that most movies wouldn't go but it's...it's not smart! And it's not considerate. It's not thinking about what, you know, serial killers really go through and instead, you know, they try to create this visual realm which is so fucking ingenious. I was really hyped to see this movie. Uh, and they create this visual realm that would actually show you what's going on in the person's mind, which is really kinda cool. But's it's mostly just there's a bad guy, just evil in there. And again, when you're just creating a villain that isn't complicated, that isn't, you know, complex and is just, you know, a bad seed, even if it's in the person's mind and I get that. I know they're saying that, you know, well, this person is very complex and here are the complexities, but even the complexities are not complex! They're just, you know, it's a guy with horns going (speaking gravely) "I've killed boy." (normal) You know, just turning into the bug from ''Men in Black''. And for me, the psychology of people that do these terrible things and the film is really trying to dive into these terrible things that this guy does and why he does it, you know, you could say it in two seconds: bad childhood. (snaps his fingers) Done. You know, it doesn't make me experience it really because I never know what he's like as a normal person. I go into the review very deep into that. Uh, why I don't feel sorry for the guy because we just see him as the monster. I think at one point, you see him as a little kid, but tell me. What was he like as a little kid? Really. Wha-what games did he play? Who are his friends? Where, uh, where did he hang out? What did he do as a child? The most they is that he played with dolls and that's just in a line of dialogue. We know NOTHING about this guy. For a film that tries to dive so deep into him, all we ever get out of it is that he was beaten as a child. We get nothing else. One of the worst psychological studies ever. And I appreciate also that it's trying to do it almost all visually. You know, sort of the Stanley Kubrick route where you look at, you know, a script that has all this dialogue. You just rip out half the dialogue and just tell it visually. People who can do that are so inspired and they use the visual medium of film making but this movie did not catch on and it felt...I don't know what the guy was going for or not, but it felt unbelievably exploitive. And not in a fun, oh-ha-ha-ha, like, you know, "No, I'm really gonna take you into the darkest, deepest realms of everything.". But it's...it just feels like, again, you know, he's just shouting (exploitive voice) "Ask me what it means! I'm complex! I'm tortured! You should look at me and go "Ooh! He's an artist! He understands things that I cannot!"". But it's just, you know...maybe if it was more like the David Lynch route. Now even the story doesn't support that. David Lynch wouldn't have like a machine that goes inside the guy's mind. It would just...just the whole movie would be inside the guy's mind. Like that's going balls all out. You know, but when you get Jennifer Lopez and Vince Vaughn and you have this stylistic world where the cops wear the shades and they look and they obsess over the killers and stuff, I mean it's like, no that's movies. And you're not...but it-it's clichéd Hollywood movies and you're not making the movies, you know...where you're really trying to push the envelope. You know, with the story and the way you're telling the story. You know, I mean, I...honestly, I'd love to see if, you could argue here everybody has, I'd love to see someone like David Lynch do a movie like this, you just take out the cop element. You know, or trying to find someone in time. You just make it where you just go inside a killer's mind. And that's it. And I don't even know if you'd say it was a killer's mind. It could mean anything to anyone. I mean, I'd like...if you're gonna be all interpretive and shit, go all out. Don't put, you know, this concrete story and when you go into the mind, it's like "oh, what does it mean? What does it mean?". No, you can't do that. You know, you have to...if you're gonna really be engulfed in a world, you have to engulf the person in the world. You can slowly, you know, move them into it or suck them into it. Again, Kubrick was very good at that. I think Lynch still makes, uh, a, to some extent, is very good at that. But, with a movie like this where here's the machine, you're in the guy's mind, now you're out of the guy's mind and stuff. How much fun would it be if they came out of the person's mind and... they weren't sure. Like if they were out of the mind or if they were not in his mind or if they were in the real world or whatever. Maybe they start hallucinating and stuff like that. How about the after effects of going in the killer's mind? It's like that's...I'm writing a much better movie right now just being angry at it. You know, so, it, just, oh! What you could have done with this movie and, uh, it just came of as this exploitive, artistic, look-at-me pretentious. I know a lot of people who like it. So, if you do, that's just the effect it had on me, that's how it rubbed off on me. I just, ooh, really hate it.
   
 
==''#7: [[Baby Geniuses]]''==
 
==''#7: [[Baby Geniuses]]''==
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