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(The 2015 intro plays. We open up on the NC dialing up someone on his phone. It turns out he's dialing up Cinema Snob.)

CS: Nyeah, hello?

NC: (chipper) Cinema Snob!

CS: (disinterested) No.

NC: (still chipper) But it'll be for the DVD!

CS: (still disinterested) No.

NC: (still chipper) It'll get it even more exposure!

CS: (still disinterested) No.

NC: (still chipper) It'll allow me to mercilessly make fun of you! (NC realises what he said) Wait, is that my advantage or yours?

CS: (still disinterested) Neither, really.

NC: Come on! It's the Cinema Snob movie, who the hell's gonna take it that seriously?

CS: (realising) Ohhh, you're talking about the Cinema Snob movie, oh, well, well that's alright. I-I thought you were talking about The Human Spider and you leave that masterpiece alone.

(Cinema Snob hangs up on the Nostalgia Critic. NC puts his phone down.)

NC: I'm gonna assume everything everywhere makes no sense. The Cinema Snob Movie!

NC (V.O.): Cinema Snob, deemed the classiest person on Channel Awesome, despite the fact that he reviews porn, gives us an origin story on par with any fantastically great character, minus being fantastically great. It's the most goofy, exploitive, violent, in-your-face film since Shaq did a cross over with Deep Throat.

NC: So let's see if a Z-grade movie reviewer can make a decent Z-grade movie himself. This is The Cinema Snob Movie.