The Battle of Epic Proportions


Date Aired
June 29th, 2008
Running Time
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Place card stating: "On June 28th, The Angry Video Game Nerd and Captain S from attended an event at Digital Press Video Games in Clifton, New Jersey...when "guess who" showed up...."

NC is shown walking purposefully down a street. He stops to check his hat in his reflection in a shop window, then resumes his dramatic march. He walks up to and enters Digital Press Video Games...

He walks up to AVGN, while everyone around talks in hushed voices at his sudden appearance.

AVGN: Critic! So, Critic! How dare you come here?

NC: (continues his yelling, having nothing else to say):...NEEEEEEEEEEERD!


NC: Have you accepted my challenge to review a horrible nostalgic movie?

AVGN: Yes, Nostalgia Critic, I do accept your challenge. BUT! You must suffer at a bad game.

NC: What? I shouldn't have to do a bad game, that's your department!

Captain S: Hold on hold on hold on guys, I thought this was all online, I didn't know this was for real.

NC: You stay outta this, S!

Captain S: (to AVGN) You put like 10 disclaimers on your video!

AVGN: Listen, just cause we saved Christmas together doesn't mean you have to be involved with this, this is out of...

NC: Oh just stay outta this, S.

Captain S: (to NC) Who are you? Are you on Youtube or something?

NC: Oh I was. I was ...almost as popular as him, I was like number 50-
AVGN throws a pen from his pocket pouch at him
NC: Okay, you know what Nerd, let's settle this, right now! Right here, right now!

AVGN: In the ring, in the ring! But you know what? My ring's outside.

NC: Let's do it! Right now! Let's go! Clear the way!

The Rocky theme begins playing, and the three (and the people in the store) make their way out to the parking lot; when they arrive, they form a triangle and stare each other down, with Western stand-off music playing; they each prepare themselves for the fight

NC: You ready?

All three scream and then charge at each other in faux slo-mo. The battle commences, with each participant scoring blows on the others. No one really ever gets the upper-hand, and the entire fight is done in faux slo-mo. Captain S pulls out a Sega Zapper, and AVGN throws a Hadouken. NC ends up pulling out his gun as well. Captain S does a handstand at one point, but it accomplishes...absolutely nothing. The fight ends when all three do a dramatic charge and crash into each other, falling down

NC: Alright! Okay, I'll do a video game.

AVGN: You do a video game, I do a movie.

Captain S: I'm just gonna keep playing games.

AVGN: Just keep playing games, that's the best.

Captain S: Alright.

NC: But mark my words Nerd, this isn't over. You have not seen the last of me! THERE WILL BE OTHERS! um, what's the best way to get out of here?

AVGN: Oh, you know where 80 is?

NC: Yeah yeah

AVGN: Well you go where Route 80 is and you make a...oh I don't know, you make a turn here, you go, so...

NC: Okay, cool cool. Later!
They resume screaming angrily at each other

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