Tandy Computer Whiz Kids: The Answer to a Riddle
September 17, 2012
No riddles are made or answered, and yet there are still plenty of questions.
Holokara: Hello, and welcome to Atop the Fourth Wall, where bad comics burn. In the 200-plus episodes of this show, we've only scratched at the surface of comics featuring the Tandy Computer Whiz Kids, also known as the TRS-80 Computer Whiz Kids. (beat) Also known as the Children of the Damned.
(Cut to two shots of Tandy Computer Whiz Kids comics, both featuring DC superheroes: "TRS-80 Whiz Kids: The Computers that Saved Metropolis!" and "Superman and Wonder Woman: Tandy Computer Whiz Kids")
Holokara(v/o): But here's the thing to remember: the ones produced in part by DC, those were the good ones – in a relative sense, I mean, since they were nonsensical and stupid, but better than the "Fit to Win" comic. I would say it's because those were made by professionals of the industry, but then I took a closer look at the credits of today's comic and the "Fit To Win" comic. Both were penciled by...
(Cut to a shot of...)
Holokara (v/o): ...Dick Ayers and Chic Stone, longtime artists of the industry. Hell, both were notable inkers for...
(Cut to a shot of Jack Kirby and a message reading: "Chic Stone is surprisingly difficult to find pictures for.")
Holokara (v/o): ...Jack friggin' Kirby and did plenty of penciling work for the Big Two throughout their long careers.
(Cut to shots of the "Fit to Win" comic)
Holokara (v/o): The nicest thing I can say about the artwork on the "Fit To Win" comic is that the characters at least looked varied and different, with various models for the heroes and the villains and the background characters. And trust me, in a world where we've had artists who are only capable of drawing two different people, male or female, that is a breath of fresh air.
(A shot of Alec and the other students staring toward the reader while all saying, "Great, Ms. Wilson!")
Holokara (v/o): On the other hand, it also produced this image of nightmare-inducing terror! They're looking into your souls, people! However, the true problem with these books is the writing, and the ones made by Radio Shack are the worst ones.
(Cut back to the DC-based Tandy Computer comics)
Holokara (v/o): The ones made by DC at least try to have action or at least stayed focused on the overall point of the comics: to sell Tandy computer products. As such, they at least try to have the products in some way contribute to the resolution of the problem.
(Back to "Fit to Win" again)
Holokara (v/o): In the "Fit to Win" comic, we suddenly took a right turn into drug PSA territory. And the same happens in today's comic.
Holokara: So let's dig into (holds up today's comic) "The Tandy Computer Whiz Kids: To Answer a Riddle"*, and... well, answer a riddle, I guess.
- NOTE: It's actually "The Answer to a Riddle".
(AT4W title sequence plays; title card has "Leaving On a Jet Plane" by John Denver playing in the background; cut to a closeup of the comic's cover)
Holokara (v/o): Now, you might be wondering why I'm not qualifying this as "PSA Hell". Well, it's because it's not supposed to be a PSA. It's supposed to be shilling out Radio Shack products. And yes, I know I introduced "PSA Hell" in a Tandy Computer Whiz Kids review, but the PSA part of it came so far out of left field that I was blindsided by it. Look, a Teen Titans comic, trying to stop drug use? That's a PSA. A bunch of idiots talking about electronics from the '80s, and then talking about how drugs are bad, okay, is not a PSA. Our cover is... okay. Certainly better than the "Fit to Win" comic. Alec and Shanna are standing near a crashed airplane, and we can see thunder crashing in the background as the rain drops. Really, all I'm thinking is that for such "Whiz Kids", they apparently are not smart enough to dress for the weather.
(The comic opens to the first page)
Holokara (v/o): We open at an airstrip where...
Narrator: A mysterious flight is about to begin...
Man: (calling out to an airplane) Hey, you guys, hurry with that fuel! We've got to get out of here before daylight!
Holokara: (as this man) We're leaving on a jet plane, and we don't when we'll be back!
Holokara (v/o): Actually, considering the kind of plane that is, and since this comic is about selling computers, I fully expect that this is actually the plane from Time Chasers.
(Cut to a clip of the Mystery Science Theater 3000 gang watching Time Chasers)
Mike Nelson: Look, guys, the transport countdown on the computer. (the bots laugh)
(Cut back to the comic)
Holokara (v/o): Why do I get the feeling that this comic will also lack skydiving grandmas? Two of the individuals flying the plane [Grady and Jack] discuss how they need to fly low to the ground for the next few hours and without any lights, because they need to try to avoid detection when they fly over the border. Otherwise, their dreams of fortune will not come true.
Holokara: (as Grady) Now we just need to wait for that TV Koopa guy to arrive and we'll be fine.
Holokara (v/o): We cut to the Metropolis School– erm, I mean, Coastal City Elementary School. Well, okay, obviously, the TRS-80 Computer Whiz Kids in the DC Universe are different from the ones published by Radio Shack, but obviously, there won't be any other continuity hiccups in its own universe.
Voice [Ms. Wilson]: Good morning, class! I hope that you enjoyed your summer vacation!
Holokara: (confused) Summer vacation? Wasn't that how the "Fit to Win" comic opened? Is this some kind of remedial class or something?
Holokara (v/o): Yeah, seriously, it's basically the same opening, with Ms. Wilson asking the class what they did during the summer. However, this time, it's Shanna who's talking about what she did instead of Alec. She wants to tell them all about what her science club did.
Ms. Wilson: Okay, Shanna! Tell us about your club!
Shanna: Well, Ms. Wilson, it all really began a year ago when we started our science club...
Ms. Wilson: But what about last summer, Shanna?
Holokara: (as Shanna, irritably) Stop interrupting and I'll get to that, lady!
Holokara (v/o): By the by, I just noticed that Shanna looks an awful lot like a young Nostalgia Chick.
Shanna: Well, Ms. Wilson, we worked like we did last year, and saved our money for a trip to Big City's Museum of Science and Technology!
Holokara (v/o): "Big City"? That's actually what it's called?
Holokara: Big City. Population: 450.
Shanna: It was great fun! And we learned a lot, too!
Holokara (v/o): Yeah, that's nice, Shanna, but why did you have to be standing up for this? Come to think of it, look at the shot of the class again. There are about three people all in the back who are standing up! God, the budget cutbacks on this school must be hell. They can't afford desks for all the students!
Ms. Wilson: Shanna, that was a splendid summer activity!
Holokara: (as Ms. Wilson) It's not really as impressive as Alec's "fit to win" club, but I guess it'll do.
Ms. Wilson: I think a big hurrah is in order!
Holokara: (as Alec) Ms. Wilson, I'll hurrah for her when I'm allowed to sit down again.
Holokara (v/o): Oh, and there are hurrahs and yays, but this time, only Alec cheers for her. You know, Alec is the kid who even Spider-Man encourages should be bullied a little. Ms. Wilson had also earlier said that she had some surprises for the kids, and now Alec demands to know what those surprises are! And dear Lord, the budget cutbacks are even worse! They're crammed into this class like sardines! Look at how close everyone is to one another! We cut back to the airplane, now arriving at an area called Lost Horizon, and have to wait for a phone call at 11AM to see if the coast is clear to continue.
Jack: Well, we've got a long wait ahead of us... with nothing to do but drink coffee and look out the window!
(Cut to footage of the MST3K gang watching The Skydivers)
Mike: And thus, we peer into the complex inner workings of his character.
(Back to the comic again)
Jack: Is this supposed to be the good life?
Holokara: (as Jack) Earl, do you ever feel like crying, but you just don't know why?
Grady: We'll get paid for our time and trouble! Maybe we can even retire after this job! Don't forget... I didn't say what kind of retirement!
Holokara: (as Grady, laughing) Miniature golf and reruns of Days of Our Lives, (holds up fist) here I come!
Holokara (v/o): Ms. Wilson invites the class to go to the library to find their first surprise.
Alec: I can't wait to find out what could be a surprise in the library!
Holokara: (crossing his fingers) "Twilight, Book 5", "Twilight, Book 5", "Twilight, Book 5"!
Holokara (v/o): They arrive at the library.
Librarian: I'm Ms. Young, the librarian for our school, and I have a super surprise for you under this cloth!
Holokara: (as Ms. Young) It's the body of the last child who didn't stay quiet in the library!
Shanna: Please uncover it now, Ms. Young!
Alec: The suspense is too much! Hurry!
Holokara: (throwing comic aside) Oh, God, I can't take it! (runs up at camera) I MUST KNOW!
(He bumps into the camera, causing the signal to be lost, replaced with static; cut to a shot of Linkara screaming)
Announcer (v/o): We'll be right back after we replace the camera.
(AT4W logo appears in the corner, as we go to commercial; upon return, the same shot of Linkara screaming is shown)
Announcer (v/o): And we're back, and out a grand for a new camera.
(AT4W logo appears, as the review resumes)
Holokara (v/o): So she [Ms. Young] unveils it and it's, shock of all shocks, "a new color computer 3 video monitor, a program pak, TRP-100 text and graphics printer, disk drive and modem".
Ms. Young: Plus a subscription to a database information service!
Holokara: (incredulously) So you paid for a single computer for the library, instead of getting your students some friggin' desks?! What the hell is wrong with this school district?!
Holokara (v/o): Shanna is amazed by the direct connect modem program pak, but Alec doesn't know what it's used for. And instead of answering, some other student confusedly stares at it and asks how the computer will bring them an electronic encyclopedia.
Holokara: You know, you're in the library! You probably have non-electronic encyclopedias to call upon. And if you don't, I know a guy who can hook you up.
(Cut to a clip of a commercial for the Encyclopedia Britannica, showing a college-aged nerdy kid in glasses sitting at a computer)
Nerd: Remember me? I'm the kid who had a report due on space. Then I got the new Encyclopedia Britannica.
Announcer: He had a report due on space and then he got the new Encyclopedia–
Nerd: (interrupting) I thought I made that abundantly clear.
(Cut back to the comic)
Holokara (v/o): Shanna explains that the modem lets the computer connect by phone to a subscription service to an information database.
Holokara: Hey, I have a dumb question: why isn't the teacher explaining all this?!
Holokara (v/o): But no, the librarian orders Shanna to explain this stuff. My God, I was kinda joking about it in the "Fit to Win", but seriously, these two kids are plants! They're not actual students!
Black girl: Wow, tell us more about the information encyclopedia!
Holokara: (visibly nervous) Okay, she will, unusually large foreheaded student!
Holokara (v/o): The librarian asks Shanna how she knows about all this.
Shanna: It's a long story, Ms. Young! But in a few words, it all began two summers ago when we and a group of other kids in our neighborhood started a science club!
Holokara: (confused) Is the comic looping itself? Didn't she already explain this crap?
Shanna: Our science club is a great way to continue to learn during the summer...
Holokara: (frustrated) WHY IN THE SEVEN HELLS WOULD ANY CHILD WANT TO LEARN DURING THE SUMMER?!
Holokara (v/o): The entire POINT of summer break is that they don't HAVE TO LEARN! They can go outside and play! They can relax! They can read for their own enjoyment! They can sit and ROT! LET THE CHILD HAVE A FRIGGIN' BREAK! I guarantee you, any child that has one of these expensive computers you're shilling out, they own them because of the GAMES they can play on them!
Shanna: Doing all those experiments with our electronic lab kit... including simple computer circuits... and practice on our color computer, it made learning fun!
(Cut to a clip of Office Space)
Lawrence (Diedrich Bader): No. No, man. Shit, no, man. I believe you'd get your ass kicked sayin' something like that, man.
(Back to the comic again)
Holokara (v/o): We cut back to the two airplane pilots who have been waiting until a quarter past eleven for the phone call. It finally arrives, letting them know that there's a severe rainstorm coming, and they'd check back again in half an hour.
Holokara: (dramatically) "Tandy Computer Whiz Kids: (points to camera) To Pack an Umbrella"!
Holokara (v/o): Shanna explains how to get access to the information service you've seen in some of the other comics.
Shanna: Next I will type in the code letters the electronic encyclopedia database... Then the prompt asks you to choose one of the categories of information listed on the video monitor!
Holokara: (as Shanna, pretending to type on a keyboard) Huh, I wonder what this one is... (stops "typing" and looks up, amazed) "Nude Photos of Teachers"...
Black student: Gee whiz! That was easy!
Holokara: Yeah, just as easy as writing believable dialogue, boy howdy, golly gee whiz!
Holokara (v/o): So, after the mere ten minutes of computer information, I guess several hours have passed, and it's now lunchtime. Ms. Wilson dismisses them for lunch, where no doubt everyone ate their meals in a synchronized fashion and chanted their devotion to the Tandy Corporation (dramatically) and their cathode ray tube god that is the comput-ar! (normal again) Meanwhile, the two pilots get their next phone call and report that the weather is looking better and that they should try to complete the assignment. They double-check that the gas tank is full and fly off for Coastal City. However, one of the two says he's distracted since he's been thinking about what they're doing.
Grady: It's kind of a destruction we're bringing to Coastal City – to kids... to adults – for money! Big money! Blood money!
Holokara: (as Grady) We don't even get sick time, Frank. I'm starting to think that 401k ain't worth it.
Holokara (v/o): He says he's thinking about quitting the business, to the shock of his partner. Meanwhile, back at the school that fiscal responsibility forgot, Ms. Wilson says that their next surprise has arrived.
Ms. Wilson: Class, this is Laura Scott, a student at the Coastal City Junior High! She is a member of her school's "Say No To Drugs" committee... and she is going to tell our class about some of the harmful effects of drug abuse!
Holokara: (as one student) Ms. Wilson, when are we gonna learn about, like, history or literature or something? (as Ms. Wilson, arms crossed) For the ninth time, never! This school is about drug abuse and computers! That is all we can afford.
Laura: Thank you, Mrs. Wilson [sic] and students, for the opportunity to talk to you about "Say No To Drugs..." the answer to a life threatening crisis in our community!
Holokara: Objection, Ms. Wilson! I believe the Fairness Doctrine demands that we also hear opposing viewpoints from the "Say Yes To Drugs" committee!
Laura: The kid next door... where has he been lately? You may have seen him tagging along with some of the local druggies from maybe your own neighborhood...
Holokara: (as Laura) Report suspicious activity at once! Even your neighbor could be a Communist– er, I-I mean, drug user! Drug user. (moves eyes around shiftily)
Laura: He's headed for big trouble... so are his new friends! It's a long way down to rock bottom!
Holokara: I don't know, "Marville" proved you could hit it pretty quickly.
Laura: If he's lucky, maybe he can pick himself up! But, maybe, after he's been vegged out, a real space cadet, there may be no way back– and he's so young!
Holokara (v/o): A helpful editor's note informs us that this is "part of a real-life speech by a junior high student!"
Holokara: That's right, a real person actually used the term (makes "finger quotes") "space cadet" like this.
Laura: I'm sure you've heard all the basic facts on marijuana, heroin, and cocaine – getting burnt out from smoking pot, or injecting heroin several times a day... also that cocaine can severely damage, or ruin the membranes of the nose!
Holokara: Oh, yeah, the damage to the nose is the only bad thing that the cocaine does.
(Cut to Snowflame looking at his hands, which are bloody red)
Snowflame: What has Snowflame done??
Laura: Then, there's another frightening drug, PCP, also known as angel dust which is an hallucinogen! Too much of this drug can cause a user to go into a coma, or it can even lead to death!
Holokara: (as a student) So those other drugs won't kill you? (as Laura, waving dismissively) Oh, no, not a chance at all. It's only angel dust that does that.
Laura: It is said that some users were believed to have drowned in water, because, in their confusion, they didn't know which way is up... and that some have even died in fires, because they had become insensitive to the pain of burning!
Holokara: (as Laura) And don't even get me started on what China Cat will do to you!
Laura: Does it make sense for so many young people to ruin their health, their mind, and their future?
Holokara: Damn right! Only the elderly should ruin their minds, healths and futures!
Ms. Wilson: Thank you, Laura, for that splendid speech about drug abuse! Class, let's give her a big hurrah!
Holokara (v/o): Unfortunately, only Shanna lets out a hurrah, no doubt trying to pretend that her soul is still there.
Alec: We say no to drugs!
Holokara: Say no to drugs, (points to camera) but yes to modems!
Ms. Wilson: Now, it's time for the third surprise!
Holokara: (exasperated) FOR GOD'S SAKES, WOMAN, DO YOU HAVE A SYLLABUS OF ANY KIND?!?
Holokara (v/o): Back to the plane, they see a dark cloud ahead of them and decide that they have to try to fly through it. In the classroom, Ms. Wilson reveals that their class has been selected to operate the Coastal City Elementary School science exhibit at the county fair. Okay, what the hell?! Are we gonna repeat every plot point in the "Fit to Win" comic?! That one, it was the physical fitness booth at the state fair; now it's a science booth at the county fair?! For the love of crap, Ms. Wilson, Superman and Wonder Woman were doing more to teach these kids than you are! Oh, and naturally, the Whiz Kids have been selected to run the booth and are excused from class to set up the exhibit. And they need to travel by bus. And she's springing this news on them RIGHT NOW.
Holokara: No wonder this school is in such deep money troubles! (holds up two fingers and thumb close together) The lawsuits from parents who aren't given permission slips for these sudden field trips!!
Holokara (v/o): Back with the airplane, the weather is getting worse for them, and they try to find their airport. They spot the county airport, and the guy in the trucker hat decides...
Grady: THAT'S IT!!
Holokara (v/o): ...calling the airport and requesting an emergency landing, along with a non-uniformed police detective to meet them on the ground.
Jack: Hey, man! What are you doing? So that's why you've been talking in riddles all this whole time!
Holokara: Um... he didn't answer the (makes a "finger quote") "what are you doing" question. You just jumped to the next sentence.
Holokara (v/o): Also, "talking in riddles"? What the hell are you talking about? He seemed pretty clear about his doubts! And I swear to God, this had better not be the "riddle" that the title is referring to, since this is the dumbest thing ever! Spoilers: It is. What the hell?! The blond guy pulls a gun on Trucker Hat Dude, demanding they continue on to Coastal City Airport. In a shocking display of intelligence, Trucker Hat Guy points out that the blond dude can't fly the plane, so shooting him would be a bad idea. Alec and Shanna arrive at the county fair, which just happens to be a stone's throw away from the airport. How dramatically convenient! They spot the plane as it tries to come for a landing, but the weather gets too much, and the plane crashes on the runway. Naturally, there aren't any airport rescue vehicles coming in to try to help, so it's up to Alec and Shanna to jump the fence and go for the plane, spotting Trucker Hat Guy, who has now lost his hat, and they pull him free of the plane.
Holokara: (as Alec) C'mon, let's move his spine around some more! Maybe we can turn him into a cyborg using Tandy computer parts!
Alec: Got to get him far enough away before an explosion!
Holokara (v/o): Explosion? The hell are you talking about? They go back for the blond guy and pull him free as well. We also spot a single emergency vehicle rolling towards them, but the two have managed to drag the men at least fifty feet away from the plane until it, well, explodes for no reason. Oh, and the burning plane is apparently a justification for the rain to stop and a rainbow to appear. It's a friggin' thick rainbow, too. Single rainbow, all the way across the sky. Yyyyeah... Detective Shaw arrives, without Duke Nukem this time, and Trucker Hat Guy wakes up to tell the detective about the drug dealers they were meeting at the Coastal City airport. Yep, the plane was full of drugs, so that burning plane? Yeah, I think the emergency services are gonna take their time heading out of the area. A local reporter is also there, and Det. Shaw asks for her help.
Det. Shaw: Quick, Ms. Baker! Let me borrow your Cellufone 200!
Holokara: "Cellufone"? (scoffs) That technology will never take off. (takes out cellphone) Hang on, I'm gonna tweet this.
Det. Shaw: Do you two know who you just rescued?
Alec and Shanna: No!
Det. Shaw: They were drug smugglers!!
Alec and Shanna: WHAT?
Holokara: (as Alec) Drug smugglers?! THROW THEM BACK IN THE FIRE! (holds up fist) BURN THE HERETICS!!
Det. Shaw: Kids, the good news is... they have said no to drug smuggling!
Holokara: Let this be an important lesson for you all: say no to drug... smuggling.
Holokara (v/o): Seriously, was Det. Shaw in the room at the time the girl was giving her speech? Why the hell did he phrase it like that? The next morning, the two smugglers are in the hospital, being interviewed by the reporter.
Grady: ...and put this in your news story... we got a second chance! In or out of prison... we're going to join the kids... and the Mamas and the Papas... in saying no to drugs!
Holokara: (confused) The Mamas and the Papas? How is (makes a "finger quote") "Monday, Monday" gonna stop kids from using drugs?
Jack: That goes for me, too, Grady! You were right after all– I did see the light!
Holokara: (as Jack, stretching out his arms in a cast-like pose) Thanks to you crashing the plane, my legs have been crushed, and I need to drink all my meals through a straw now! But you were totally right!
Holokara (v/o): And so, our comic ends on the steps of the elementary school, where the principal of the school has declared that day "Alec and Shanna Day" in celebration of their heroism. Wait, the principal admits that they saved a lot of lives by getting those two out and getting the drug lords arrested, but it's the principal who's honoring them?!
(Cut to the closing scene from "Fit to Win")
Holokara (v/o): In the "Fit to Win" comic, the only thing Shanna did was call the detective on the phone, because she thought something looked suspicious, and that got the frickin' MAYOR to declare a special day of appreciation! What the hell?!
Holokara: (angrily holding up comic) This comic sucks! (beat) And yet, it's actually kind of better than the "Fit to Win" comic... (wiggles hand) sort of.
Holokara (v/o): Yeah, let me explain. This comic is awful in its intended purpose to promote computer products, since they only promote the single computer they've already promoted before and a friggin' cellphone. That was it! However, most of the artwork wasn't nearly as bad, and the Children of the Damned seemed less bizarrely enthusiastic as the last time. Perhaps it's because their teacher is insane and every day, they walk with her declaring she hoped they had a good summer vacation. However, the big reason why I'm awarding this one more points than "Fit to Win" is because Alec and Shanna actually do something! Like I said, the two didn't participate in any meaningful way beyond a phone call in "Fit to Win", but this time, the two actually show some heroism by rescuing the two men from the wrecked plane, while the airport crew took their sweet-ass time getting to them.
Holokara: (holds up index finger) Although, it's important to remember that just because it's better, doesn't mean it's good. (throws down comic, gets up and leaves)
(End credits roll)
The lettering on this comic is atrocious. The ink runs on all the pages, sometimes making it a big black mess in the balloons.
You know, the addition of the actual Riddler would have made this comic a lot better.
Holokara: Seriously? Guys, I'm made of lights and force fields! What do you think you're gonna do to–
(Suddenly, he looks on his shoulder to spot the mobile emitter on his shoulder, which they seem to be aiming for, as it is filling with static)
Holokara: That's not gonna work, either, kids. (crosses arms) I can stand here all day.
Harvey: Doc, he isn't doing anything!
Dr. Linksano: His power is dropping, but slowly. Keep it up!
Holokara: (still standing there as bullets hit him) Guys, I'm getting bored here.
(90s Kid's machine gun runs out of bullets, much to his shock)
Holokara: There, you see? Now, will you just–
(He stops, however, looking startled, as 90s Kid takes out the BFG and fires a laser blast at Holokara, who even now stands there, somewhat impressed)
Holokara: Oh, hey, you managed to recharge that thing. That's awesome.
(He then nonchalantly takes the laser blast in his hand and redirects it back at Harvey and 90s Kid, knocking them down)
Dr. Linksano: (shocked) No, no! Keep up the attack!
Holokara: (singsong voice) Oh, Dr. Linksano! (looks around) Is that you I hear?
Dr. Linksano: Oh, crap in a test tube. Pollo, it's up to you.
Pollo: I will try. (red light on him turns on, along with a buzz)
Holokara: (hears the buzzing, but is not worried) Ooh, Pollo's attempting to hack the mobile emitter. It'd be a real shame if I hadn't foreseen this and, well, put him into a very special body just for that reason.
(Holokara snaps his fingers. Suddenly, Pollo stops short as the red light explodes in a shower of sparks, startling/worrying Dr. Linksano)
Dr. Linksano: Pollo, you okay?!
Pollo: I'm fine. I think I will take a nap now.
Dr. Linksano: Well... it's up to me then.
(Linksano gets to his feet and starts firing his gun at Holokara, who turns and sees him)
Holokara: Oh, hey, there you are. (looks up in mock concern) My power levels are dropping, but... (singsong voice) not quite enough. (looks at the emitter on his shoulder that Linksano is aiming for) Say, Linksano, did you know that Linakra set up a bunch of emergency procedures to prevent this sort of thing from happening? (laughs) Like, say... emergency procedure three, activate!
(Suddenly, a force field appears right on Linksano, ricocheting his shots back at him and knocking him down)
Holokara: (walking out into the middle of the room) Yeah, the force field technology came from Comicron 1, you know. (looks around at all the heroes knocked out, shakes his head and shrugs) Honest to God, look at you dumbasses. Did you really think you had a shot here? (shakes head and sighs) There is not a single person here who can stop me. Hell, there is not a single person ON EARTH who can stop what I've begun!
(Suddenly, a red ball of energy hits his mobile emitter, which suddenly makes him flicker. Startled, he turns around to see who shot him like that: it's the real Linkara, grimly aiming his magic gun at Holokara!)
Linkara: Oh, I don't know. (cocks gun) I think I might know a guy.
TO BE CONTINUED