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Suburban Knights: Part 4
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Date Aired:
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June 30th, 2011
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Running Time
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12:48
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Website
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The Nostalgia Critic and his group continue their way through the forest trail. As Critic is viewing the map, Linkara begins to make conversation.
Linkara: You know, Critic, I couldn't help but feel that you're... not getting into character.
NC: Well, sure I am. I'm all magical and shit.
Linkara: Well it's just that... The map says that we must be in character in order to find the treasure. It... helps us find our way...
NC: Alright, Sir Dicks-alot, tell me what this means then: "You will ask which warrior which way to go. Which way do you think which warrior will show?" Now what the hell does that mean?
The party is startled be a clap of thunder. They look forward to see a little lady with thick, black glasses, a pointed rubber nose, a large witch hat, and a black track suit.
Witch: *with a friendly wave* Hello!
NC: Boy, this guy couldn't spell worth jack shit. *to witch* Hey, you need a "T" in here in order for this pun to work!
Witch: Well, next time I see the ol' Jaffer, I'll give him the info.
NC: So, you know Jaffers too, huh? Lemme guess: You're supposed to be Witch Warrior.
Witch: That's the whole kit n' kabootle!
Linkara: Then tell us, Witch Warrior: Which way... to Malachite's Hand?
Witch: Hmm, take one hundred steps, turn left in the forest, keep goin' straight.
Linkara: Huh, that was easy.
Witch: But unfortunately, you have to pass by me in order to continue. It's my job as Good Witch of the Woods.
The party begins to snicker.
NC: Really? You're the Good Witch of the Woods, huh?
Witch: Yeah.
Benzaie: Oh, we're supposed to be scared of the Good Witch of the Woods?
Witch: If you could, yes.
NC: Alright, Kiki. Mrs. Good Witch of the Woods.
Critic, Linkara, Phelous, and Bennett approach the witch to mock her mercilessly.
NC: *in baby talk* Oh, who's a good witch? Oh, you are a good witch!
Critic, Linkara, Phelous, and Bennett all begin to spout baby talk at the witch as the rest of the party chuckles.
Witch: Ah, ha, ha, alright, very funny...
NC: Oh, who's a good witch? Oh, you are a good witch!
Bennett: You're such a good witch! Aww, such a good witch!
The witch begins to voice her annoyance, but Critic, Linkara, Phelous, and Bennett continue to mock her as the rest of the group laughs on. The four begin to play Ring-Around-the-Rosie around the increasing annoyed witch, and before they can finish their rhyme, the witch grabs Critic's wrist to a dramatic chord. Critic looks down at the witch, who looks up at him with glowing red eyes and begins to speak in a demonic voice.
Witch: YOU WILL PERISH IN THE FLAMING PITS OF HELL, WHERE THE DEMONS ASMODEUS AND ASMARA WILL FEAST ON YOUR BOILING FLESH AND CHEW ON YOUR EYEBALLS!!! THEN, A THOUSAND YEARS OF BLAZING TORMENT!!!!!
Critic screams hysterically as the witch makes her threat. Linkara, Phelous, and Bennett flee midway through her speech. Critic is finally able to escape the witch's grasp and cowers behind Nostalgia Chick. The witch immerses herself in light, her screams echoing throughout the woods. She then swiftly returns to her kind demeanor.
Witch: Neat, huh?
NC: Stupid chain letter, I knew I shouldn't have followed it. Why didn't any of you try to stop me?!
Witch: Chain letter?
A brief silence occurs as the witch has discovered something amiss.
Witch: But Jaffers didn't- Oh... Oh dear... Perhaps it's better if you die now rather than wait for what's coming. I know what hunts you, and believe me, it's much kinder if I just, mmm... smash your brains in and and drink from your bleeding skulls.
The witch then screams maniacally and summons lightning from the sky, causing the party to scatter all around. Among the hysteria, Phelous drops his dolls. Before he can retrieve them, lighting strikes them, destroying them.
Phelous: *sobbing* My friends!
The witch continues her spell, cackling demonically. Handsome Tom then takes a stand and approaches her.
NC: Tom? Where the hell are you goin'?
Tom walks up to the witch, still summoning lightning around her. The rest of the party look on in suspense. Tom steps in front of the witch and sprays her face with mace. The witch stumbles back, her spell ceased. She then starts cursing in a demonic voice.
Witch: OH, YOU BUNGHOLE!!! NOOOOO, YOU TORTUROUS COCK GOBLIN!!! YOU HAVEN'T HEARD THE LAST OF MEEEEEEEE!!!!!
The witch then disappears into a ball of light. The party is left speechless after what had just occurred.
Benzaie: How did she do this?
Linkara: It's magic. You don't have to explain it.
NC: Don't be stupid, there's no such thing as magic.
Linkara: *annoyed* Really? Then how did she do it?!
The party stares at the empty trail the the witch once was. Critic is unable to answer an impatient Linkara.
NC: Keep movin'.
The party continues onward.
Cut to the map Spoony had lost, still where it was since Episode 3. A valley girl talking on her phone walks up to it.
Girl: *talking on phone* And my dad shot her. It was weird. *she notices the map* Hold on a sec.
The girl bends over to reach for the map. Before she can pick it up, and cane pins the map down. She looks up to see the mysterious person looking down at her.
Mysterious Person: Where did you find that?
Girl: Just here. Is it yours?
The stranger picks up the map and looks around aimlessly.
Girl: Excuse me. I said, "Is it yours?"
The stranger continues to ignore her.
Girl: Well, if it's not yours, I'm takin' it? Finders keepers.
The girl tries to take the map from the stranger, but the stranger holds on to it to a dramatic chord.
Girl: *tugging for the map* Hey, come on. *she goes back to her phone* No, no, Frank, it's just a... Rocky Horror reject.
MP: Is that your phone?
Girl: Yeah.
MP: Don't use that.
Girl: Why not?
MP: Just don't.
Girl: *toyingly* Why?
MP: What do you think of the 21st century?
Girl: I don't know. I can't see that far into the future.
MP: Does your cocoon of technological webbing keep you safe? Does it protect you from the real evils of this world? Do you feel better knowing what every last man, woman, and child is doing this very moment, all across this fearsome existence? Every message, every podcast, Facebook, "Charlie Fucking Bit Me!" Does it enrich your life? Does it give you... purpose?
The girl has no idea what to think of the man's question, then gives a flirtatious smile.
Girl: Hey, you're kinda hot. What'cha doin' tonight?
A bolt of red lightning crashes on top of the girl, causing her to explode. The stranger, map in hand, walks away from the pool of fire where the girl once was.
Cut to Spoony's party, walking through a trail. Spoony holds his hand up to halt the group from continuing into a forked road.
Spoony: The path is split! No more shall we wander naked in the dark. 'Tis time to see where the next arrow lies.
The group looks confused until Todd in the Shadows translates.
Todd: He's checking the map.
Spoony: Yes.
Group: Oh, okay...
Spoony looks into his bag, but becomes troubled when the map is not there.
Spoony: Um, oopsie-doodle.
Todd: What? What is it?
Spoony: Well, um... uh...
Todd: Did you lose the map?
Spoony: I'm not saying that, uh...
Todd: *raising his voice* Well, what are you saying?
Spoony: ...Well, I'm saying it now.
The party groans.
Snob: This is intolerable.
Paw: A pox on your houses!!!
MarzGurl: *speaks in Japanese* (in subtitles: Yeah, what he said.)
Spoony: No wait, wait. I think I remember what it said on the map.
Todd: You couldn't remember the goddamn alphabet!
Spoony: No, really! I believe it said, "If the path should split from left to right, pick up a stone and say 'Give me light.'"
Joe: "Pick up a stone and 'Give me light?'"
Spoony: Well, I think so.
Snob: Oh, right. *picks up a stone* Like I'm just supposed to pick up a stone, stand here, and say "Give me light?"
A cut to Spoony's Gatecleaner character suddenly appears, with an accompanying loud gong.
Gatecleaner: DOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
Cinema Snob is startled and drops the stone.
Snob: Shit!
Cinema Snob's jumpiness grabs the others' attention.
JewWario: What was that?
Snob: Nobody saw that?
JewWario: No.
Snob: *picks up another stone* You actually pick up a stone, stand here, and say, "Give me light."
The Gatecleaner pops up again.
Gatecleaner: OOOOOOOOHHH!!!!!
Cinema Snob is startled again and drops the rock.
Snob: Fuck!
Everyone is taken aback by Snob's reaction.
Luke: Okay. *picks up a rock* I'll try it.
Film Brain: Like hell you will. *tries to take Luke's stone* Give me that!
Luke: *still holding on to his rock* Like hell you will, Spotted Dick.
Film Brain: Back off, Dudley Do-Right!
Luke and Film Brain: *both holding the rock* Give me light!
The Gatecleaner pops up again.
Gatecleaner: DOOOOOOOO!!!!! Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha...
The Gatecleaner's appearance startles the two, but they manage to hold on to the rock.
Gatecleaner: So, puny mortals, you are looking for the correct path to lead you to Malachite's Hand?
Luke and Film Brain: Yes...
Gatecleaner: Then follow these words closely, for I shall not repeat them. Go to-
Film Brain suddenly drops the rock.
Film Brain: Bollocks! *retrieves rock*
Luke: Film Brain!
Film Brain: Sorry.
The two hold onto the rock again.
Luke and Film Brain: Give me light!
The Gatecleaner appears yet again.
Gatecleaner: DAAAAAAAHH!!!!! Don't let that happen again! These rocks already get bad reception!
Luke and Film Brain: Sorry.
Gatecleaner: Good. Now go to the r-
Luke suddenly drops the rock.
Luke: Oh, hold on. I better right this down. *searches himself for a pen and paper*
Film Brain: Just remember it!
Luke: Ugh, fine! *retrieves rock*
Film Brain: Like working a second grader.
The two hold onto the rock.
Luke and Film Brain: Give me light!
The Gatecleaner appears once more.
Gatecleaner: DAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!
Luke and Film Brain: *unamused* Seen it.
Gatecleaner: Now stop dropping the damn rock already! I'm a busy man and I haven't got all day! Got it?!
Luke and Film Brain: Yes, sir.
Gatecleaner: Alright! But this is the last time, I swear to God! If you miss it, you miss it. Now, go-
A phone rings.
Luke: Oh, hang on a second.
Luke drops the rock to answer his phone. The party looks on, growing more frustrated.
Luke: *on phone* Hello? ...Oh, hi Mom. ...Yeah, I'm on a quest for buried treasure. Isn't that cool? ...No, this one's for real this time. *more quietly* No, I won't bring home another dead animal.
The party looks fed up.
Luke: *on phone* Okay, love you, too. Bye. *hangs up and puts away phone* We may continue. *retrieves rock*
Film Brain: *sarcastically* Oh, may we?
The two hold onto the rock.
Luke and Film Brain: Give me light!
The Gatecleaner pops up once more.
Gatecleaner: DAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!
Luke: Ugh, do you have to do that every time?
Gatecleaner: I'm contractually obligated to, yes. Now stop dropping the damn rock!!!
Film Brain: Hang on, I've got an idea!
Film Brain places the rock on the palm of his and Luke's hands.
Film Brain: *tosses rock* Whoo! *catches rock*
Gatecleaner: DOOOOOOO!!!!!
Film Brain: *tosses rock* Whoo! *catches rock*
Gatecleaner: DAAAAAHH!!!!!
Film Brain: *tosses rock* Whoo! *catches rock*
Gatecleaner: AAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!
Film Brain: *tosses rock* Whoo! *catches rock*
Gatecleaner: OOOOOOOOOHHH!!!!!
Film Brain: *tosses rock* Ha, ha! *catches rock*
Gatecleaner: DRAAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!
Film Brain: *tosses rock* This is fun! *catches rock*
Gatecleaner: WOOOOOOOOHHHH!!!!! STOP IT! STOP IT! *finally catching Luke and Film Brain's attention* YOU INSOLENT MAGGOTS!!! I've seen three-headed hellspawn more cooperative than you! Now, do you want to know the stinking location or not?
Luke and Film Brain: Yes...
Gatecleaner: Alright then! Go to the fork in the road, take a right, and continue forth, got it?!
Luke and Film Brain: Yes.
Gatecleaner: Good! Never call me again, you little bastards! Now if you'll excuse me, I have rock waiting. *flips to next line* HAAAAAAAHH!!!!!
Cut to a woman with red hair and a bright colored dress in a modern home, with a cigarette in one hand and rock pressed against her ear in the other.
Gatecleaner's Wife: Honey, did you ever pick up the croutons?
Gatecleaner: I told you to check the pantry. I'm not buying more croutons when we already have an open box!
Cut back to the party, where Luke steps forward, shoving Film Brain aside.
Luke: Well, I figured it out. We take the path to the right.
The party looks intimidated. Luke is unsure of what's going on, then notices they aren't looking at him. He and Film Brain turn around to see the mysterious person from moments ago, staring dramatically at them.
Snob: Who is that?
Todd: Looks like a member of Run-DMC.
The stranger approaches the party. JewWario steps up to speak with him, stepping cautiously while the others look on.
JewWario: Um, excuse me? Can we help you, strange... Gestapo looking person?
The stranger dramatically reaches into his pocket, quickly pulling out the map and presenting it to JewWario. JewWario recoils in fear, then realizes what the man is holding.
MP: You dropped this.
JewWario, still on his guard, takes the map and goes over it.
JewWario: Oh. Oh! Well- Well, thank you very much! *turns back to the group* What a nice person. We should give him something. Uh-
JewWario turns around to find that the man has already disappeared. The rest of the group looks just as confused as JewWario as to where the man could have gone to so quickly. They turn around. They are then startled by the sudden appearance of the Cloaks in front of the trail. Cloak 1 waves daintily at the party.
MarzGurl: *in Japanese* (subtitles: Chicken humpers!)
Spoony: Run like children!
The party runs away from the Cloaks like children.
Cloak 1: Unleash the fire of a thousand arrows.
Cloak 2: You mean the machine gun?
Cloak 1: ...Yes.
Cloak 2 hands Cloak 1 her broadsword and pulls out a machine gun. She then opens fire at the party, who are still fleeing in terror. Angry Joe suddenly turns around, with a look of joy on his face.
Joe: Wait, I didn't know we could use machine guns!
As Cloak 2 continues to fire away, Joe whips out his signature MP5 and points it at the Cloaks.
Joe: MY NAME IS INIGO MONTOYA, MOTHERFUCKERS!!!
Joe unleashes a hail of bullets onto the cloaks, who begin to withdraw. Cloak 1 and Cloak 3 do their best to deflect the bullets as Cloak 2 continues to fire, while Joe buys time for the party to escape.
Joe: KING KONG AIN'T GOT NOTHIN' ON ME!!!
Joe continues his fire at the retreating Cloaks.
Cloak 1: Cloak 2, don't be a hero!
As the Cloaks finally retreat, MarzGurl returns to fetch Joe.
MarzGurl: *in Japanese* (subtitles: Let's go, Ted Nugent!)
MarzGurl takes Joe with him, but not before Joe can fire a few more shots at the Cloaks. The two rejoin the party, exhausted from running. Joe, however, is on an adrenaline high.
Joe: Oh, man, that was awesome! I'm liking this character more and more!
Luke: Wait a minute! *looks around* Where's Film Brain?
The party realizes they are minus one companion.
Cut to a lost Film Brain, who has been hiding in among the trees in the chaos.
Film Brain: Hello? *steps out from hiding* Hello? Did we win?
A hand turns Film Brain around. Film Brain is terrified to see it is Cloak 1.
Film Brain: *waving his wand* Exxon Petrolium!
Nothing happens. Cloak 1 slaps Film Brain's wand from his hand, then slaps his face. Film Brain screams in pain. Cloak 1 then gets a firm grip on Film Brain's shoulders and stares at him.
Cloak 1: Look into my eyes!
Film Brain: *terrified* I can't see your eyes! They're covered up!
Cloak 1: Oh... Well, pretend you can see my eyes.
Film Brain: *gleefully* Okay.
Cloak 1: Look into them!
Film Brain: *terrified* AAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!
Cloak 1: You are now one of us! One of us. One of us.
Cloak 1 continues chanting, putting Film Brain into a hypnotic stupor. Cloak 2 and Cloak 3 join in on chanting "One of us." Film Brain's blank expression is shown one more time before cutting to black.
| The Nostalgia Critic Transcripts
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| 2008:
|
Transformers · Cartoon All-Stars to the Rescue · Cloverfield Trailer Review · Power Rangers: A Look Back · Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Book Launch · Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: The Movies · The Top 11 Scariest Nostalgic Moments · Super Mario Bros. (1993) · Cloverfield Review · Street Fighter · Mortal Kombat · Space Jam · The Nerd Rant · The Nerd Rant Part 2 · Pokémon The First Movie · The Nerd Wizard Rant · The Wizard · The Top 11 Naughtiest Moments in Animaniacs · Batman & Robin · The Top 11 Catchiest Theme Songs · '90s Sports Montage · The Nerd Response…Response · The Top 11 Drug PSAs · The Battle of Epic Proportions · Captain Planet · Double Dare · 3 Ninjas · Top 11 Animated Nostalgia Hotties · Video Game Review · The Search for the Nostalgia Chick · He-Man and the Masters of the Universe · Follow That Bird · Saved By the Bell · Tom and Jerry: The Movie · Top 11 Saddest Moments · Nostalgia Chick Winner · Surf Ninjas · NC vs The Nerd Showdown · Top 11 Nostalgic Animated Shows · Kazaam · The Nerd vs. NC: The Final Battle · Off to Beat the Nerd · Drew Struzan Tribute · Halloween '08 Special · Double Dragon · Top 11 Underrated Nostalgic Classics · Howard the Duck · Mortal Kombat: Annihilation · Godzilla · Top 11 Disney Villains · The Super Mario Bros. Super Show · Top 12 Greatest Christmas Specials · Jingle All the Way
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| 2009:
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Nicktoons · Nickcoms · SNICK · Good Burger · The Making of the Final Battle · Ferngully: The Last Rain Forest · A Kid in King Arthur's Court · The Good Son · The Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog · Top 11 Nostalgic Mindfucks · Twister · Garbage Pail Kids · Rock-A-Doodle · Titanic - The Legend Goes On · The Pagemaster · NeverEnding Story · Moonwalker · Top 11 Dumbest Superman Moments · TMNT · Red Sonja · TGWTG Team Brawl · Short Circuit 1 & 2 · Batman vs. The Dark Knight · Full House · North · Critic and Nerd: TMNT Making of Coming Out of Their Shells · Sidekicks · Gargoyles · Transformers 2: Revenge of the Fallen · Steel · Top 11 Cereal Mascots · Barb Wire · New vs Old - LOTR Animated vs Lord of the Rings · Last Action Hero · Captain N · We're Back: A Dinosaur's Story · Warriors of Virtue · Captain America · Top 11 F*ckups · Alone in the Dark · Blank Check · Old vs. New: Willy Wonka · Cool as Ice · Suburban Commando · Next Karate Kid · Casper · Superman IV · Congo · Siskel and Ebert Tribute · Judge Dredd · Tank Girl · Jack Frost · He-Man and She-Ra Christmas Special · Next Best Christmas Specials · Star Wars Holiday Special · Ernest Saves Christmas
|
| 2010:
|
Commando · Junior · Conan and Conan the Destroyer · End of Days · Battlefield Earth · Bebe's Kids · Lost in Space · Top 11 Villain Songs · Quest for Camelot · Old vs. New: Nutty Professor · Bio-Dome · NeverEnding Story II · Top 11 Most Awkward Christopher Walken Moments · Flubber · Home Alone 3 · Old vs. New: King Kong · Drop Dead Fred · The Care Bears Movie · Kickassia: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6 · Jaws 3 · Free Willy · A Troll in Central Park · Theodore Rex · Top 11 Coolest Cliches · Hook · Independence Day · The Room · The Phantom · Zeus and Roxanne · Animaniacs Tribute · Flintstones Movie · Mr. Nanny · Rocky IV · Chairman of the Board · Next Top 11 NC Fuckups · Pound Puppies and the Legend of Big Paw · Pebble and the Penguin · Ernest Scared Stupid · Top 11 Scariest Performances · IT · Leprechaun · My Pet Monster · Commercial Special · Old vs. New: 10 Commandments vs. Prince of Egypt · The Thief and the Cobbler · Waterworld · Little Monsters · Rover Dangerfield · You're a Rotten Dirty Bastard · The First Couple: TMNT
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| 2011:
|
NeverEnding Story III · Ferngully 2 · Secret of NIMH 2 · Care Bears 2 · Dungeons and Dragons · Top 11 Dumbest Spider-Man Moments · The Lost World: Jurassic Park · Return of the Nostalgic Commercials · Inspector Gadget · Old vs. New: The Karate Kid · The Langoliers · Airborne · Baby Geniuses · Raiders of the Story Arc: X-Men · The Magic Voyage · Double Team · Top 11 Dumbasses in Distress · Jaws: The Revenge · Gordy · The OTHER Animated Titanic Movie · Revenge of the Nostalgic Commercials · Once Upon a Forest · Little Nemo · Old vs. New: True Grit · Suburban Knights: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7 · Transformers 3: Dark of the Moon · Milk Money · Rad · Raiders of the Story Arc: Duck Tales · Care Bears in Wonderland · Cop and a Half · Top 11 Batman TAS Episodes · Alaska · Let's Play Bart's Nightmare · James and the Giant Peach · The Avengers · Simon Sez · The Tommyknockers · The Haunting · Blair Witch 2: Book of Shadows · Exorcist 2 · Doug's 1st Movie · The Cell · Raiders of the Story Arc: Superman · Felix the Cat · Moulin Rouge · Babes in Toyland · How the Grinch Stole Christmas · Child's Play
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| 2012:
|
Santa Claus: The Movie · Star Trek: The Motion Picture · Star Trek 3: The Search for Spock · Star Trek 5: The Final Frontier · Star Trek 7: Generations · Star Trek 9: Insurrection · Patch Adams · Ponyo · Dunston Checks In · Thomas and the Magic Railroad · Top 11 Nostalgia Critic F*** Ups Part 3 · Richie Rich · Jungle 2 Jungle · Old vs. New: Manhunter vs. Red Dragon · Star Chaser · Transformers Cartoon · A Simple Wish · Alien Resurrection · Jack · Heavy Metal · Mr. Magoo · Top 11 Simpsons Episodes · Signs · Digimon: The Movie · Top 11 F*** YEAH Movie Themes · Baby Geniuses 2 · Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom · The Wiz · Total Recall (with Sci-Fi Guy) · Scooby-Doo · To Boldly Flee: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8 · The Top 11 Best Nostalgia Critic Episodes · The WORST Movies Nostalgia Critic's Reviewed · NC's Top 11 Favorite Jokes
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| 2013:
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The Review Must Go On · The Odd Life of Timothy Green · Pearl Harbor · Son of the Mask · The King and I · Catwoman · The Cat in the Hat · Top 11 South Park Episodes · Jurassic Park · A.I. Artificial Intelligence · The Master of Disguise · Turbo - A Power Rangers Movie · Top 11 Dumbest Lord of the Rings Moments · Sailor Moon · Les Miserables · Top 11 Adult Jokes We Never Got as Kids · The Last Airbender · Bridge to Terabithia · The Shining Mini-Series · Sharknado · Devil · Dawn of the Commercials · Man of Steel · Top 12 Santa Clauses · Eight Crazy Nights · The Christmas Tree
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| 2014:
|
Face/Off · The Wicker Man · Ghost Rider · Top 11 Strangest (Yet Best) Couples · Ghost Dad · Disney's Alice in Wonderland · Top 11 Moments You Never Noticed in Ghostbusters · Disney Afternoon · Foodfight! · Swan Princess · The Lorax · Old vs. New: Spider-Man · Blues Brothers 2000 · Jurassic Park 3 · After Earth · BloodRayne · The Purge · Top 11 Trailers · Small Soldiers · The Princess Diaries 2: Royal Engagement · Ghost Rider 2 · Top 11 Worst Avatar Episodes · Top 11 Best Avatars (with Dante Basco) · Maximum Overdrive · Top 11 New Halloween Classics · Monster Squad · Rise of the Commercials · Forest Warrior · Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer · Christmas Story 2 · Care Bears Nutcracker
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| 2015:
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The Matrix · The Animatrix · The Matrix Reloaded · The Matrix Revolutions · AVGN Movie · Mamma Mia! · The Haunted Mansion · Daredevil · Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2014) · Demolition Man · Top 11 Animaniacs Episodes · Legend of Zorro · The Ewoks Cartoon - Was That Real? · Fantastic Four · Cowboys of Moo Mesa - Was That Real? · Sharkboy and Lavagirl · Small Wonder - Was That Real? · Jupiter Ascending · Jurassic World · Top 11 TV Show Intros · Planet of the Apes · Osmosis Jones · Garfield: The Movie · Pixels · The Smurfs · Hammerman - Was That Real? · Mad Max: Fury Road · Event Horizon · Children of the Corn · Hocus Pocus · Conquest of the Commercials · Dragon's Lair · We Wish You a Turtle Christmas · Christmas with the Kranks · Star Wars: The Force Awakens
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| 2016:
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The Happening · Top 11 Funniest Shyamalan Moments · Lady in the Water · Labyrinth · Spawn · Cats and Dogs · The Phantom of the Opera · The Adventures of Pluto Nash · Pinky, Elmyra and the Brain - Was That Real? · Batman v Superman · Blade · Old vs. New: Cinderella · Spy Kids 3D: Game Over · Jem and the Holograms (2015) · The Grinch vs. The Cat in the Hat - Was That Real? · Scooby-Doo 2 · Alvin and the Chipmunks · Ghostbusters (2016) · Teddy Ruxpin Live Action Series - Was That Real? · Wild Wild West · The 3rd Animated Titanic Movie (Tentacolino) · The Adventures of Rocky and Bullwinkle · Stephen King's Dreamcatcher · Freddy vs. Jason · Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out of the Shadows · Battle of the Commercials · Inspector Gadget Saves Christmas · Top 12 Christmas Commercials · I'll Be Home For Christmas · Rogue One: A Star Wars Story
|
| 2017:
|
Top 11 Best Movie Sequels · Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakquel · Top 11 Worst Movie Sequels · The Smurfs 2 · Garfield 2: A Tail of Two Kitties · Cool World · Old vs. New: Evil Dead · Top 11 WTF Alternate Endings · Balto · Fant4stic · Clockstoppers · The Flintstones in Viva Rock Vegas · Suicide Squad Trailer · Suicide Squad · Alien vs. Predator · Transformers: The Last Knight NON-Review · Wonder Woman · Norm of the North · Cats Don't Dance · Hulk (2003) · Tom and Jerry: Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory · Monkeybone · G.I. Joe: The Movie · The Sorcerer's Apprentice · DuckTales (2017) · Eragon · Kangaroo Jack · A Goofy Movie · Green Lantern · Scary Godmother · It (2017) · Halloween (2007) · The Mummy · The Mummy (2017) · Dragonball Evolution · Bangarang · War of the Commercials · Super Mario Bros.: The Anime · Rapsittie Street Kids: Believe in Santa · A Muppet Family Christmas · Home Alone 2: Lost in New York · Star Wars: The Last Jedi
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| 2018:
|
Mars Attacks! · Lara Croft: Tomb Raider · Top 11 Good Adam Sandler Movies · Yogi Bear · Horton Hears a Who · Batman Forever · Freakazoid · Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked · Maleficent · Alice Through the Looking Glass · The Jungle Book (2016) · Beauty and the Beast (2017) · Woody Woodpecker · Jack and Jill · An American Tail: Fievel Goes West · Starship Troopers · The Emoji Movie · Scooby-Doo: The Mystery Begins · The Boss Baby · The Spirit · Deadpool 2 · Chicken Little · The Angry Birds Movie · Do the Bartman · Fox Kids · The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen · Bartok the Magnificent · Mission: Impossible 2 · Sonic the Hedgehog: The Movie · Doom · Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles · Ghostbusters 2 · Old vs. New: Teen Titans vs. Teen Titans Go · Freddy Got Fingered · Big Fat Liar · Fantastic 4: Rise of the Silver Surfer · Grading Cartoon Show Intros · Sleepwalkers · Top 11 Stephen King Movies · Van Helsing · Rubber · The Powerpuff Girls Movie · Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom · A Wrinkle in Time · Escape from the Commercials · A Christmas Story Live · The Search for Santa Paws · The Most HATED Nutcracker Movie Ever Made · Elf Bowling: The Movie
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| 2019:
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Max Payne · Robocop (2014) · The Black Cauldron · Top 11 Funniest Siskel and Ebert Reviews · The Country Bears · Donnie Darko · X-Men: The Animated Series · X-Men · X2: X-Men United · X-Men: The Last Stand · X-Men Origins: Wolverine · Best F(r)iends · Tom and Jerry and the Wizard of Oz · Hop · Stuart Little · Toonami · Balto II: Wolf Quest · Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within · Man on the Moon · Mary Poppins Returns · Movie 43 · Alien 3 · Barney's Great Adventure · Percy Jackson and the Lightning Thief · Constantine · Kim Possible · The Lion King · Blade II · That Darn Cat · The Jetsons Meet the Flintstones · Underworld · Mulan II · Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Road Chip · The Pest · The Wall · Aladdin (2019) · Hannibal · It: Chapter Two · Demon Knight · Venom · Scooby-Doo on Zombie Island · Justice League · Frozen · Planet of the Commercials · The Grinch (2018) · The Most INSANE Christmas Rom Com · The Santa Clause 3: The Escape Clause · Die Hard
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| 2020:
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Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker · Beverly Hills Chihuahua · Con Air · Duckman · Supergirl · Spider-Man · Spider-Man 2 · Spider-Man 3 · The Amazing Spider-Man · The Amazing Spider-Man 2 · Trolls · Dolittle · Frozen II · Independence Day: Resurgence · Critters · Alpha and Omega · Avatar (2009) · Stuart Little 2 · Superman Returns · Totally Spies!: The Movie · Elektra · Alita: Battle Angel · Mouse Hunt · Battleship · The Hunchback of Notre Dame · The Lion King (2019) · The Adventures of Elmo in Grouchland · The Animated Lord of the Rings · The Iron Giant · The Bill & Ted Movies · Mulan · Playing with Fire · Problem Child · Pokémon Detective Pikachu · X-Men: Apocalypse · The Lost Boys · The Stand · The Witches · Scary Stories To Tell In The Dark · Tusk · Curse of the Commercials · The Lion King II: Simba's Pride · Sucker Punch · Krampus · The Muppet Christmas Carol · Deck the Halls · Batman Returns · Home Alone 4
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| 2021:
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Shark Tale · The FREAKIEST Raggedy Ann Movie · The Mummy Returns · Batman vs. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles · 9 · Strange Magic · The Terminator · Terminator 2: Judgment Day · Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines · Terminator Salvation · Terminator Genisys · Terminator: Dark Fate · Wonder Woman 1984 · Freaked · The Prince of Egypt · Blade: Trinity · Mulan (2020) · Tom and Jerry (2021) · Scooby-Doo: Curse of the Lake Monster · Who Framed Roger Rabbit · The Banana Splits Movie · Ready Player One · Men in Black II · An American Tail · Monty Python's The Meaning of Life · Cats · Jetsons: The Movie · Atlantis: The Lost Empire · Mystery Men · X-Men: Dark Phoenix · Cinderella III: A Twist in Time · The Mask · The Nightmare Before Christmas · The Ring · Scooby-Doo and the Witch's Ghost · The Lawnmower Man · Leap! · Space Jam: A New Legacy · A Series of Unfortunate Events · Commercials Resurrection · Beauty and the Beast: The Enchanted Christmas · The Polar Express · Home Alone 5: The Holiday Heist · Grumpy Cat's Worst Christmas Ever · Reindeer Games
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| 2022:
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Old · Birds of Prey · Rango · Daphne & Velma · Pan · Tarzan · National Treasure · Return to Oz · Batman Begins · The Dark Knight · The Dark Knight Rises · Batman · Batman: Mask of the Phantasm · Hancock · Bobbleheads: The Movie · Lilo & Stitch · Pinocchio: A True Story · The Rugrats Movie · Spider-Man: No Way Home · The Brave Little Toaster · Tombstone · Legend of the Guardians: The Owls of Ga'Hoole · The Fifth Element · Garfield and Friends · The Batman · The Addams Family Movies · The Secret of NIMH · Austin Powers Movies · Morbius · The Shrek Movies · Brave · Willy's Wonderland · Diary of a Wimpy Kid · The Kung Fu Panda Movies · The Matrix Resurrections · Beetlejuice · Jurassic World Dominion · Back to the Future Movies · The Princess and the Frog · Hotel Transylvania Movies · The Frighteners · The Munsters · The Mist · Jimmy Neutron: Boy Genius · Anastasia · Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs · Commercials H20 · Hoodwinked · Elf · Disney's A Christmas Carol · A Garfield Christmas · Home Sweet Home Alone
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| 2023:
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The Ant Bully · The Sword in the Stone · Charlie's Angels · The Twilight Saga · Click · Zathura: A Space Adventure · Iron Man · Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl · Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest · Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End · Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides · Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales · Despicable Me and Minions Movies · Puss in Boots: The Last Wish · Top 11 Disney Remakes That Could Work · The Simpsons Movie · Beethoven · M3GAN · Cartoon Network Bumpers · The Little Mermaid · Dudley Do-Right · Kids' WB · White Chicks · Baby's Day Out · South Park Movie · The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie · The Great Mouse Detective · The Super Mario Bros. Movie · Bean · The Truman Show · Beavis and Butt-Head Do America · Top 11 Tom and Jerry Episodes · The Three Stooges Movie · The Road to El Dorado · The Pee-Wee Movies · Robin Hood · Liar Liar · The Flash · Monster House · Coraline · Trick 'r Treat · Thinner · Peter Pan · The Little Mermaid (2023) · Mrs. Doubtfire · Kingdom of the Commercials · Home Alone · Edward Scissorhands · Tom and Jerry: A Nutcracker Tale · Wakko's Wish · A Christmas Story
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| 2024
|
On Deadly Ground · Fat Albert · Aladdin · Top 11 Funniest Disney Villains · Kung Pow! Enter the Fist · Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse · Jumanji · Superman · Superman II · Superman III · The Snyder Cut · Top 11 Poorly Aged Bill Cosby Commercials · Galaxy Quest · Wish · The Land Before Time · Dragonheart · Happy Feet · I, Robot · War of the Worlds · Madame Web · Return to Never Land · The Princess Bride · Why is Joshua and the Promised Land? · Was I Wrong About Treasure Planet? · Is Dumb and Dumber Actually Smart or Just Dumb? · The Incredibles · Flushed Away · Disaster Movie · Charlotte's Web · Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny · Megamind · A Bug's Life · Superhero Movie · Ghostbusters · Rookie of the Year · Kindergarten Cop · Killer Klowns from Outer Space · ParaNorman · Sleepaway Camp · Hollow Man · Ronald McDonald Scared Silly · Was I Wrong About Logan? · Borderlands · Season of the Commercials · Meet the Spartans · Paddington · Rise of the Guardians · Barbie in the Nutcracker · Gremlins
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| 2025
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Snow Day · Trap
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| DVD Exclusives:
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Turkish Rambo · Video Game Review 2: Blues Brothers (SNES) · Reefer Madness · Doomsday Machine · NC - Kickassia · NC - Suburban Knights · NC - To Boldly Flee · NC - Live Review of Twilight Breaking Dawn Part 2 · Paranoia · Cup of Idiocy (Doug's Old Home Movies) · Night of the Living Dead · The Cinema Snob Movie · The Review Must Go On Review
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| Theme months
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NostalgiaWeen · Christmas · Annual Theme Month
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