Channel Awesome


June 19, 2013
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(The episode opens with Phelous in his reviewing room.)

Phelous: Internet-based horror movies. Are people just convinced that they tried this enough, it'll eventually not be stupid? Well, I guess that's why Smiley is here to prove that they're getting dumber.

(The episode's title card comes up.)

Phelous: You know what watching Smiley did to me? It made me miss watching such intelligent films like Chain Letter and Intelligent by comparison. Oh, my life is sad. SMILEY! No.

(Scenes from the film are shown.)

Phelous (vo): You know what's an amazing idea for a killer? An emoticon. Except no one ever... Oh, wait. I'm sorry, the bar has been lowered for humanity once again because someone did say that'd be a good idea in a haze of drugs and alcohol. And good thing for us, too, because, that would've made these brainless fucks who made this think clearer! And this piece of cinematic...whatever...starts off by showing us just what part of anatomy its brilliance came from. Oh, and there's the rest of the person attached to it, apparently.

Phelous: Heh. We're barely even one minute into the movie and you cheap pile of crap. I mean, no one's said it before, but jump-scares are only sometimes effective when done after setting a good atmosphere and done sparingly. The atmosphere of this film before its jump-scare was texting and an ass. So, bra-vo, guys! Maybe they caught you people off guard. That makes a good movie, though it's probably all Smiley will be able to have as its claim to fame. Whoever put that on the cover caught a few people off guard with loud noises!

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