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Phelous (shows)

Phelous

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Phelous (shows) was the main review show of Phelous. Many of the reviews cover bad horror movies, but Phelous later branched out into animated movies and Mortal Kombat parodies as well.

Episodes

Episode Number Name Description Date Released
1 Phelous and Me Mac? What does that stand for? Mysterious Alien Creature? No... Grab a Coke and head to McDonalds as Phelous tackles the shameless E.T. knockoff/movie-that-is-essentially-a-commercial Mac and Me. November 14, 2008
2 Phelous Knows What You Shouldn't Have Watched Last Summer This time around Phelous takes on the horrible horror film I'll Always Know What You Did Last Summer December 1, 2008
3 Mac and Me in 3 minutes In a parody of himself, and addressing complaints about his video length, Phelous also takes a spin at a 5 Second Movie and Bum Reviews. (Found on the site under "5 Second Movies") December 1, 2008
4 Phunny Review Phelous tackles Funny Games, a 2006 remake of an Austrian horror film. If you don't like how things turned out, you can always rewind reality with your remote and try again. What kind of shit version of "Click" is this? January 6, 2009
5 Mortal Komedy Holiday Special 3 The third holiday special of Phelous' long running series Mortal Komedy. January 21, 2009
6 The People Shooters Part II Returning from a month long hiatus on TGWTG, Phelous is officially picked up with a fake movie trailer The People Shooters Part II! Do you know how many people they've killed? About as many bullets as they've fired! February 27, 2009
7 Dragonball CG Ep 1 Vegeta and Goku play videogames while Jase and Barta begin their attack. Is that okay? As a matter of fact, it isn't. March 18, 2009
8 The Ruins of Phelous Phelous watches the gory idiot-fest, The Ruins. In a movie where a poorly guarded Mayan temple is infested with laughing plants that can mimic cell phone sounds and invade human bodies, will our unlikable group of heroes escape with their lives? Will we even care? March 24, 2009
9 Silent Phelous Phelous reviews the bastardized movie version of the loved game classic, Silent Hill. Is it a faithful attempt at bringing the survival horror franchise to the silver screen, or were we just given the dog ending? April 6, 2009
10 Phelous and the Troll Phelous reviews Troll, a misguided movie with a very familiar sounding main character. When ancient creatures threaten to turn an apartment complex into a magical forest by turning it inhabitants into plants, it's up to Harry Potter to end their reign of terror. Your Patronus won't save you now! April 23, 2009
11 A Serious Intro to Phelous Once the TGWTG audience was eagerly awaiting the Troll 2 review, Phelous gave them exactly what they wanted: A FAQ about himself. May 25, 2009
12 Phelous and the Troll 2 Phelous tackles the well-known sequel to the lesser known Troll. It's too bad Troll 2 has nothing to do with Troll. Or trolls for that matter. OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!!! May 27, 2009
13 Phelous is Skinned Deep Phelous suffers through Skinned Deep, a low budget slasher flick that tries to be so bad, it's good, but ends up being so bad it's awful. A vacationing family find themselves in the company of a family of freaks, including a scarred man with a bear trap for a mouth, a midget who throws plates, and an idiot with a giant brain. What do you expect for a movie obviously made in the early nineties...? Wait a minute. This was made in 2004?! June 14, 2009
14 Phobgoblins Phelous takes on Hobgoblins, without the MST3K riffing the movie was best known for. When a bunch of angry creature puppets escape their unlocked vault, it's up to some unlikable heroes to stop them from killing people with hallucinogenic fantasies. Grab your nearest garden tool and get ready for war! July 17, 2009
15 Mortal Komedy Episode 1 Parts 1 and 2 "Pilot" The first episode of Mortal Komedy. Introducing us to a cynical Sub-Zero, a hyperactive Liu Kang, and a very... well Johnny Cage remains pretty much the same. July 20, 2009
16 Resident Hazard How do you make Resident Evil's dialogue even worse? Take it out of context and mix it around. It won't matter if you're the master of unlocking if you're almost a Jill sandwich. Yeah? August 2, 2009
17 Phelous and the Troll 3 Phelous assaults the final installment in the Troll trilogy by taking on the movie, The Crawlers. Wait, I mean, Contamination .7. Wait, I mean, Creepers. Wait, I mean, Troll 3: Contamination .7. This time, a town and family that have nothing to do with the first two movies are attacked by radioactive plants. August 8, 2009
18 Mortal Komedy Episode 2 Parts 1 and 2 "The Big Kahn" The second episode of Mortal Komedy. Sub-Zero and Johnny Cage get ready to head to Outworld and face Shang Tsung, while Liu Kang and Smoke find a way to stop Shang's evil plan of providing everyone with the soul-stealing shampoo, Pantene Soul-V. August 14, 2009
19 Phelous Fever Phelous reviews another modern gorefest with Cabin Fever. Another group of unlikable characters are being plagued by a mysterious disease. Will you hope everyone escapes with their lives, or will you cheer the next time another character vomits up a pool of blood? August 20, 2009
20 DBZ: Is that OK? Part 1 Phelous takes part in an animated spoof of Dragonball Z. Originally a well known cartoon on Newgrounds. Is that OK? August 27, 2009
21 Phelous Aboard the Midnight Meat Train Double entendre aside, Phelous climbs into the excessively gory Midnight Meat Train. When a photographer needs a few morbid photos for an art show, he finds the macabre in spades when he stumbles across a subway train inhabited by a suit-wearing butcher, who slaughters the hapless passengers with a meat tenderizer. FATALITY! September 13, 2009
22 Resident Hazard 2 You just can't keep bad lines down. It's another hyper-edited line parody of Resident Evil, with some Resident Evil 2 thrown in for good measure. Yeah? September 15th, 2009
23 DBZ: Is That OK? Part 02 An old April Fools animation with a normal expected ending. As a matter of fact, it isn't. September 24th, 2009
24 Phelous of the Dead Phelous reviews Day of the Dead. No, not the GOOD one... it's the 2008 straight to DVD remake that reuses names from the original... and that's about it. I don't think it has anything to do with the holiday. September 27, 2009
25 Mortal Komedy Ep 03 Sub-Zero and Johnny Cage decide to do a video game review show. Their first game on the list? That shameless Mortal Kombat Rip-off, Super Street Fighter 2. October 2nd, 2009
26 Resident Phelous Trailer Phelous gives us a glimpse into his next reviews. A three-parter review of the Resident <a class="inlineAdmedialink" href="#">Evil movies</a>. October 20th, 2009
27 Resident Phelous Dressed as Barry Burton, Phelous looks in depth into the first Resident Evil movie. Hope this is not Chris's blood. October 25th, 2009
28 Phelous: Transformers - Starscream's Coronation Take 2 A reimagining of Starscream's coronation from Transformers the movie. October 29th, 2009
29 Resident Phelous: Apocalypse What?! What IS this? Phelous returns to show us the beginning of the end... of the Resident Evil movie franchise with Resident Evil: Apocalypse. Reeling from attacks on how the first movie was nothing like the games, this sequel has enough name dropping, scene stealing and character upstaging to completely obliterate the game's storyline. November 8th, 2009
30 Resident Phelous: Extinction Wait, did he just pop in Mad Max by accident? The only thing extinct in RE: Extinction is the chance that the RE movie franchise will ever be good. Phelous heads into the desert wasteland that is Earth, where Alice continues to be the only competent (and nude) person (or people) on the planet. November 21st, 2009
31 S.T.A.R.S. PSA It's time to spoof the classic PSAs with the cast of S.T.A.R.S.! November 29th, 2009
32 Donation It's time to make a donation sandwich for the December 5th Donation drive! You can still donate! December 7th, 2009
33 Phelous Reviews Silent Hill: Shattered Memories Phelous tries his hand at a game review, tackling the Wii-make of the original Silent Hill, Silent Hill: Shattered Memories. Has the Otherworld frozen over? Apparently so... December 15th, 2009
34 PhearDotCom.Com Phelous returns to reviewing horror movies with a review on the shameless Ringu ripoff, FearDotCom. It's a story about a website that kills you within seven, er, two days of visiting it. Fire up your Hotbox browser and head over on to www.feardotcom.com. Don't want to? But thou must. December 23rd, 2009
35 Santaberg Slays Phelous Phelous take a trip to Hell.... Township in Santa's Slay. A cheesy slasher "comedy" in which wrestler Goldberg plays a demonic Santa Claus who terrorizes the aptly named township. Will the heroes be able to stop Santa by getting him to his curling match on time? December 31st, 2009
34 Phelous's Night of the Bunny Rabbits What's the scariest thing you can think of? I'm willing to bet it's not bunny rabbits... but apparently SOMEONE did, because Phelous shows us the forgotten 70's movie, Night of the Lepus. Will Dr. McCoy be able to save his town from a pack of giant flesh-eating bunnies, or will he need to enlist the help of the Enterprise? Damn it, Jim! He's a doctor, not a pet shop owner! January 13th, 2010
35 Phelous Doesn't Care How Many Runs You Scored Last Summer I Know How Many Runs You Scored Last Summer?! What kind of title is that? "Generously" donated by Welshy, in this movie that's possibly pretending to be a spoof, a bullied cricket player systematically gets ironic revenge on his former teammates. Check your cup for nails and play ball... or whatever the hell cricket players say. January 23, 2010
36 Day of the Phail 2 Due to the magic of legal rights, Phelous is forced to suffer through Day of the Dead 2: Contagium, a disjointed prequel-sequel appropriately taking place in a mental hospital, featuring the typical zombies you'd expect. Zombies with mild skin conditions and telepathic powers. Tonight, we sleep. February 10th, 2010
37 Phetomatous Transfusion It's zombie time once again as Phelous reviews Automaton Transfusion, a pointless and plot-less "Part 1" of a planned trilogy. Your typical band of unlikables fight zombies of mysterious origin, while being obnoxious asshats. Featuring a cameo by Skitch playing the overworked sound composer. (Wait, how is that any different from normal?) February 17th, 2010
38 Mortal Komedy Holiday Special 4 - Part 1 and 2 The fourth Mortal Komedy Holiday special. February 25th, 2010
39 Phetelous Semetary Two What happens when you bury a copy of Pet Semetary at the cursed burial ground? It comes back as the shitty knock off movie, Pet Semetary 2. Marvel as the now widely known legend of the evil burial ground bring assholes back as immature zombies! Watch as everyone keeps having the same creepy dream about women with dog heads! Will John Conner be able to escape the torment of the bully who hates him for the unforgivable audacity of having a dead mother? This movie... was uncalled for. March 3rd, 2010
40 Night of the Living Phail 3D It's scary what can happen when your copyrights end up turning your movie into public domain... take Night of the Living Dead 3D for example. It's a horrible remake of the original movie, where all of the original characters go through much less interesting versions of the same plot... all while living in a world where the original movie exists! But it's in 3D!... in 2D! March 10th, 2010
41 The Deaths of Phelous How can one screw up such an interesting concept? Phelous reviews The Deaths of Ian Stone, a movie where the main character manages to die in a myriad of ways, only to live another life where he meets the same people in different roles. Too bad it's all just the plot of some arm-bladed mulleted monsters who are after him for completely vague and contradictory reasons. You're better off not remembering. March 17th, 2010
42 Cabin Phever 2 What's Cabin Fever without Eli Roth? Surprisingly not any better. This unneeded sequel, Cabin Fever 2: Spring Fever stars Rider Strong who's killed of within 60 seconds in favor of another cast of unlikeables. This time it's in a high school! And party cop's back! ...why does this movie even exist? March 24th, 2010
43 Phelous and the Other Troll 3 Sure, Cinema Snob may have been there first, but now it's Phelous's time to quest for the mighty sword with the other Troll 3. Ator, son of Ator, must... do something. Does this move even have a coherent plot? Phelous gives a different view of the bleh-pic saga. Cameo by Cinema Snob. March 31st, 2010
44 Phevil Phead Phreelous It's time Phelous finally shined the light on that awful "Evil Dead 3" movie. I wonder why this review is so short... April 7th, 2010
45 Transformers - Prime's Death Take 2 (parody) Phelous does his take on the death of Optimus Prime in the first Transformers movie! April 14th, 2010
46 Hostel Phostel Everyone's favorite gore-porn director Eli Roth is back with his shit movie, Hostel! Phelous guides us through the poorly represented country of Slovakia as another cast of unlikable idiots are tortured and murdered in what could have been easily avoidable situations by a bunch of rich europeans. Where's party cop when you need him? Ooh, FACED! April 21st, 2010
47 Hostel Phostel Part 2 Everyone's favorite gore-porn director Eli Roth is back with his shit movie, Hostel 2! Phelous guides us through the poorly represented country of Slovakia as another cast of unlikable idiots are tortured and murdered in what could have been easily avoidable situations by a bunch of rich europeans. No... wait, they're WOMEN this time! What ingenious writing! April 28th, 2010
48 Hostel 1 and 2 in 5 seconds Like the Mac and Me in 3 Minutes review, Phelous recaps the epic saga of his two Hostel reviews in the same manic, chair-toppling style. Featuring sped-up music that apparently earns him no stars and makes him the scum of the earth! Guest starring Kyna Porteous in a really clever joke. (Found on the site under "5 Second Movies") May 5th, 2010
49 Phelous is on Death Row When a group of documentary makers meet a group of criminals in a prison haunted by smoky ghosts, trouble is afoot! Shudder in terror as you hear "The Itsy Bitsy Spider" and fear for lives of the unlikable characters as they passively react to the improbable carnage around them. Will Phelous be able to survive a trip to Death Row or will this be- (end credits) May 12th, 2010
50 Year Two: Cinema Snob & Phelous - Troll 4 Phelous and Brad Jones attempt to talk about Troll 4 but get interrupted by the TGWTG team. Part of the Year Two event. May 19th, 2010
51 Year Two: Benzaie & Phelous - Humains Phelous and Benzaie take on the French movie, Humains. (Translation: Humans) A group of anthropologists search for signs of modern day living Neanderthals. When they find them, they react as any scientists who've just proven a theory would... terrified and irrational. May 27th, 2010
52 The Reaplous When a small town is afflicted with the Ten Plagues of Egypt, it's up the the next Karate Kid to debunk this "miracle" and it's up to Phelous to show us the truth behind the The Reaping. Is it another lame "scary kid" movie, a weak end-of-the-world plot, or a broken conspiracy thriller? Wake up from your dream within a dream within a dream and find out... dot com. June 3rd, 2010
53 Phost Shit When the entire crew and passengers of the Not-Titanic are wiped out by physics-warping tragedy, it's up to the world's best salvage crew to board the Ghost Ship and die in easily avoidable traps. Search for gold, make out with ghosts, and collect souls for upper management! June 9th, 2010
54 Dawn of the Phailing Dead It's not Curse of the Maya! no one will see it if we call it that In a world with purple suns, and off-color landscapes, a woman must contend with her recurring nightmares and solve the mystery of her new house. Get a shotgun, sound the rape horn and fend off some zombie infants! It's Dawn of the Living Dead! there, now people will watch it (Cameo by Sad Panda) June 16th, 2010
55 Phelous's Open Grave Before Jumanji had a chance to rip itself off with Zathura, there came along an honest to badness horror rip-off, Open Graves. Phelous draws the movie's cards and seals his fate! Will he win in time to wish he never played?... Before Jumanji had a chance... (Cameo by Punky) June 23rd, 2010
56 Turislous Phelous breaks his time loop just in time to review Turistas. What if Hostel took place in Brazil? What if the characters were bland instead of unlikeable? What if nothing really happened? That's Turistas, "the movie that's better then Hostel!" -Source: A box June 30th, 2010
57 DotCom For Phelous When Phelous is murdered at the beginning of the review for once, SadPanda and Sean look into who did it...kinda... as the next Phelous takes over the review of DotCom for Murder. Will random musical celebrities be able to solve the mystery of a magical hacker who nerd-rage kills people over the internet? And who really killed Phelous? July 7th, 2010
58 Pulselous Louie the Lightning Bug foretold of this disaster. Considered to be the world's most terrifying movie if you're Amish, 1988's Pulse deals with the deep seated fear we all have... What if electricity became sentient and tried to kill you?! ...wait what? Phelous deals with the shocking truth (lolpun) of this apparent "cult classic". July 15th, 2010
59 Troll 4 Commentary Commentary for the Year Two crossover! July 17th, 2010
60 Pulselous Again Get behind the wheel with Phelous as we tiredly drive through the night into 2003's Pulse a.k.a. "Octane". When a mother and her extremely bitchy daughter go on a night-time road trip, they find themselves stalked by a woman they'd seen at an accident and a weird hippie hitchhiker girl. Nothing is as cool as it might seem! Slit your tongue and pucker up for this no-octane, pulse-less non-thriller! July 21st, 2010
61 PulselousDotCom.Com Make sure to adjust your computer's antenna, it's time to set into 2006's Pulse. Oddly enough, a remake of a 2002 Japanese Horror movie, and not the 80's movie, Pulse deals with staticy internet ghosts that can download your soul. Grab a roll of red tape, and dive into this poorly-paced world wide weaksauce. (Featuring JewWario in a DOWNLOADING YOUR FACE CAMEO!) July 28th, 2010
62 Pulselous 2 Hope you've got some red tape left over, it's time for Pulse 2. Apparently third Pulse is the charm as this is a direct sequel to the 2006 movie... kinda. I guess... When the world is desperately trying to escape technology while a whiny unfit mother is on the search for the daughter she tried to kill, it's up to Phelous to Chroma Key his way through this movie's nonsensical plot. Prepare for more static! August 4th, 2010
63 Pulselousdotcom.com 3 Ready to cut through the red tape? It's time for Pulse 3! A direct continuation to Pulse 2, Pulse 3 follows the events of the daughter from the first movie, all grown up and ready to finish the internet ghosts once and for all! No, wait, she wants to help them... and bring back her murderous, neglectful mother... this IS a sequel, right? (Featuring Angry Joe in a staticy cameo!) August 11th, 2010
64 Doctor Phulse Need a name for your movie? Call it "Pulse"! This Pulse is a 2010 British made-for-TV movie about incompetent doctors infecting patients and breeding zombies for the sake of curing...something. Put a bandage on your infected wound and get ready for YET another Pulse! (Cameo by Film Brain) August 18th, 2010
65 Phatal Pulselous Phelous leaves the pulse movies behind and heads back to the 80's to do a movie where Pulse merely appears in the title. Fatal Pulse, a lame slasher where a misguided doctor is killing sorority girls in order to cure a disease... somehow. Witness comic relief so bad, Phelous didn't even have to add in the goofy sound effects! Just remember records are the deadliest weapons known to man. August 25th, 2010
66 Phinculous Finally out of the Pulse pit (kinda), Phelous tackles Incubus. When an apparently psychic Tara Reid and her group of moronic friends decide to seek shelter in a deserted research facility, they come across a nearly naked tube man who is able to possess people once they fall asleep. Marvel at the haphazard plot as it fills itself with holes, and lapses of logic. Nothing better then a horror movie where "just leaving" is a completely viable option! September 1st, 2010
67 Silent Phelous: Homecoming Prepare to stab the shit out of Silent Hill's reputation with a three hit combo from your trusty combat knife! Back with another game review, Phelous weighs in on why Silent Hill: Homecoming was such a disappointment. To hell with your spoilers, see why Alex's delusion about being a combat soldier made no sense, and why trying to go for another "Silent Hill 2 Ending" was just a cheap cop-out. September 8th, 2010
68 Resident Evil: Afterlife Rant Phelous rants about the comedy hit of the decade. Expect a full review when this "#1 movie in America" hits DVD. September 12, 2010
69 Phelous is on Case 39 It's time to crack open Case 39. Preferably with a sledgehammer. When a social worker is signed to investigate a family where the little girl from the Silent Hill movie is being apparently abused, she ends up taking her into her care, only to find out there's more going then than she thought. Watch the plot holes appear before your very eyes as this dime-a-dozen, straight to video, "scary kid" movie annoys you into fearing it. Grab some ice cream and enjoy! September 15th, 2010
70 Anacondous Snake. Why did it have to be snake? Phelous wrestles with Anaconda. When a failed priest leads a documentary crew through the jungle, they find themselves being inexplicably chased by a giant anaconda. It's hip-hop stars vs. Jon Voight vs. Bad CGI in this baffling hit. Grab some ice cubes, and chill out because this review don't cost a thing! September 22nd, 2010
71 Phanacondouses The snakes are back and more CGI than ever! This time Phelous travels to Borneo to visit Anacondas: Search for the Blood Orchid. When a pharmaceutical company finds out a certain flower may hold the secret to eternal life, they send their underskilled crew into the jungle completely unprepared for even the slightest danger. It's double the snakes, double the crossing and quintuple the surprised monkeys! (Cameo by Mike J) September 29th, 2010
72 Phanaconda 3 Time to go another round with the giant snake in Anaconda 3: Offspring. When Romanian CGI blood-spitting super snakes with spiked tails shockingly breaks free from it's glass cage in a lab, Evil Gimli sends out a team to retrieve it. Watch snakes hassle the Hoff, in this gory dime-store CGI fest. October 6th, 2010
73 Phanacondas 4 The snake has returned... yet again. When a scientist creates a hybrid of the Black Orchid, er, Blood Orchid that causes snakes to grow and instantly regenerate themselves, Evil Gimli sends a hitman to kill him because he forgot to call him on his birthday. It's a race against time as the hitmen and Johnny Cage and his research team race to meet their goals before the immortal snake finishes them off. October 13th, 2010
Special Humains Commentary Remember that crossover Phelous had with Benzaie? Now there's a commentary! October 15th, 2010
74 Stay Alive Phelous A highly requested movie, what if the Ring involved a video GAME instead of a video tape? Yes, it would be just as stupid as you'd imagine! Watch as Phelous logs into Stay Alive, where poor decisions are the name of the game. Remember, if you die in the review, YOU DIE FOR REAL. (Cameo by LordKat) October 20th, 2010
74 House of the Dead Phelous After having died for real this time, Phelous is back to review Uwe Boll's House of the Dead. When you base a movie off of a video game with some of the worst voice acting of all time, how do you do it? By making it about a rave party on a island, pointlessly inter-cutting random footage from the video game, and tossing in the occasional name-drop of course! (Cameos by Overactor, ChaosD1 and Obscurus Lupa.) October 27th, 2010
75 House of the Dead Phelous 2 With Uwe Boll out of the way for this sequel, it means it's infinitely better right?... Right? It's time for those dogs of the AMS to make a move, when the zombie infection hits a populated town. Watch your favorite AMS agent, Ellis and a group of idiotic special forces members find numerous stupid ways to get themselves into trouble. November 3rd, 2010
76 Dead Phelous and Deader Phelouser It's a diseased bird! It's a crashing plane! No, it's zombie Superman! In this almost sequel to House of the Dead, Dean Cain is infected with the G-virus where instead of becoming a ravenous undead creature, he gets super powers. Now it's up to Zombie Superman and his comedy black sidekick to stop the scorpion infection. November 10th, 2010
77 Phelous Hill Again Not content in leaving bad enough alone, Phelous revisits the Silent Hill movie, this time along with Dena in order to address issues and arguments that came up during his first review. No, he doesn't think it's better now. Sorry commenters. November 17th, 2010
78 House of the Dead (Phunny Version) In an simultaneous apology and "fuck you" to his haters, Uwe Boll released House of the Dead (Funny Version). Watch Phelous slog his way through the endless stream of lame jokes, fart noises, re-inserted outtakes and commentary phone calls. Find out is Uwe Boll is a better comedian than a director (Answer: No.) in this rehashed mess of another mess. November 26th, 2010
79 Thankskilling Phelous celebrates a very late Thanksgiving by watching a movie about a killer vulture puppet... er, turkey. A new character, Pester Z. Bum, is introduced and immediately killed off. Certainly nobody is thankful for this movie. December 1st, 2010
80 Phelous Visited Nightmare City Phelous tackles a poorly dubbed Italian movie featuring a bland protagonist, blood-sucking zombie mutants, aerobics, stupid characters and plenty of nonsense. Could it be real or a literal nightmare? ...Yeah, it's all just a nightmare. December 8th, 2010
81 The Phelous Triangle Set course for the ship of time loops because contradictions come in waves! Phelous takes a look at this confusing movie involving a woman caught in a time loop of death. If you aren't confused by the end...you're a lot smarter than this movie. December 15th, 2010
82 A Phelous Black Christmas This holiday season the word play on SLAY never gets old. Phelous reviews this piece of Christmas coal involving murderous siblings, a house full of whiny victims, and plenty of Christmas-themed deaths. December 23rd, 2010
83 Cry_Wolph It's Cry_Wolf... Nothing is real... or clever... or interesting! Phelous reviews a movie with a stupid "game," plenty of horribly cruel teenagers, and Bon Jovi himself getting...shot in the heart. December 29th, 2010
82 Slap Across Phelous Eyes This is NOT a film! It's a device used to induce headaches! Phelous tackles this mess of a movie involving four annoying girls, a psycho woman, and lots and lots and LOTS of driving. January 5th, 2011
83 Night of the Phailing Dead 30th Anniversary It's Night of the Living Dead with all the additions and changes it never needed! Phelous reviews the recent re-release of the zombie classic and shows us why some movies are better left untouched. January 22nd, 2011
84 Children of the Living Phail Zombies attack the most forgetful people in the world. Also forget about the children too, they aren't important. Phelous checks out the even more unnecessary sequel to the Night of the Living Dead 30th Anniversary film. January 26th, 2011
85 La Horde Phelous, SadPanda, ChaosD1 and Welshy team up to run around a hotel room while complaining about a french horror movie with zombies and yellow lightning. February 2nd, 2011
86 Phain Letter Who would guess a movie about chain letters would be completely stupid and pointless!? WHAT A SHOCK! Luke Mochrie joins Phelous as they take a look at a movie where if you don't send those annoying chain letters, you die. Or get killed. ...It's still stupid and pointless. February 9th, 2011
87 Phlorentine Zombies... err rabid people attack an apartment building while a cameraman makes sure to get everyone's death on tape. Phelous checks out this "real" footage flick and the stupid characters within. And why does Phelous deem them stupid? Five words: Will not restrain the infected. February 16th, 2011
88 Phead Snow Nazi Zombies somehow get overshadowed by idiots who suffocate their girlfriends, as a joke, and try to find other ways to almost kill themselves. February 23rd, 2011
89 Top 10 8th Doctor Moments Phelous goes over all the amazing adventures the 8th Doctor had on screen and gives us the best 10! March 2nd, 2011
90 Birdphemic Part 1 Rod and Nathalie must fight their way through some of the WORST sound and video editing ever so they can get together, but is that a picture of a bird in the distance? March 9th, 2011
91 Birdphemic Part 2 The animated gif birds attack and explode because of global warming or something. Will our heroes find enough coat hangers to fend off the limited animation monstrosities? March 16th, 2011
92 The Human Centiphede Phelous reviews The Human Centipede in the room where he drops human centipedes. March 23rd, 2011
93 Funny Games Again A return to Funny Games to talk about it's "message" and a big change for the "show". March 30th, 2011
94 Resident Hazard 3 Resident Hazard 3!? You're a pitful sandwich and don't belong in this world! ...Yeah? April 5th, 2011
95 Phwilight The 2nd Phelous really dives into the shit with Twilight... really? Twilight? WHY!!!??? April 6th, 2011
96 Resident Phelous: Degeneration Phelous looks at that Resident Evil Movie people requested. April 13th. 2011
97 Resident Phelous: Afterlife A dragging plot, useless characters, stupid confused Wesker, an Alice sandwich and all played in SLOW MOTION. Afterlife, you're pitiful. May 4th, 2011
98 Jump Scare Phelous To Hell If you don't get a mortgage extension make sure you curse the loan officer's button to hell. May 11th, 2011
99 Drive Phru A clown mascot from a fast food restaurant comes back from the dead to get revenge on the world by making bad jokes while killing. June 8th, 2011
100 A Serbian Film... whatever... Dadadadaaa SERBIAN! ... I hate this movie. June 15th, 2011
101 Pwamp Zombies This very well might have been the editing inspiration for Birdemic. (May not contain a swamp.) June 22nd, 2011
102 Phoogeywoogeyman So... it's all about the Boogeyman? Lame! The Boogeyman better not be in this! Really though it shouldn't have been. June 29th, 2011
103 Phoogeywoogeyman 2 The Boogeyman is loose in the hospital and only Gabrielle, Jigsaw or people getting bored and shutting the movie off can stop him! July 6th, 2011
104 Phoogeywoogeyman 3 These Boogeyman movies aren't going to stop any time soon, it seems. July 13th, 2011
105 The Phoogeywoogeyman Kickin It Sunday School When stocking head haunts a mirror the only thing that can save the day is water. July 20th, 2011
106 Phoogeywoogeyman 2 (1983) Ulli Lommel co-stars in both versions of this movie based around telling stories you weren't there for and killer toothbrushes. July 27th, 2011
107 Return of the Boogeyphoogeyman Ulli Lommel and Stockinghead are back, but only Fake Wonderwoman can save the stock footage by learning to put her stockings on again. August 3rd, 2011
108 Stephen King - The Boogeyphoogeyman The Boogeyman and this time backed by Stephen King and a woman in a room. Only cigarettes and therapy can save us this time! August 10th, 2011
109 Pheow Mixlous The New Phelous reviews something very dear to his new heart, CAT FOOD! August 15th, 2011
110 Jeepers Pheepers Will Kyle, Lupa and ChaosD1 be able to help CatPhelous save the review from PhelousD1?... This seems slightly silly. August 17th, 2011
111 Pheepers Creepers 2 The Creepsta is back throwing his own head at people who are too stupid to drive a bus to safety. August 24th, 2011
112 Phlorentine 2 We gotta get these mother F$#%ING hamsters off this mother F$#%ING plane! August 31st, 2011
113 Crocophile This movie has jumped the boat... with a crocodile. September 7th, 2011
114 Crocophile 2 Crocodile 2 marks the return of the flying Crocodile and bring whatever you want aboard airlines. September 14th, 2011
115 Phoc and Me Lets see what kind of crocodile movie the Mac and Me director can make! September 21st, 2011
116 House of Phax Trading Vincent Price for Paris Hilton isn't quite the even deal, but she does at least give us something nice in this film! September 28th, 2011
117 Phrom Night Prom Night! Everything is all right... except for bland "remakes". October 5th, 2011
118 Phamityville Horror A family dares itself to live in a house 28 days with INSANE consequences. October 12th, 2011
119 A Nightmare on Phelm St. A story about Freddy's lame brother who tries REALLY HARD to be just like him. October 19th, 2011
120 Phalloween Resurrectlous The night HE regretted coming home! October 26th, 2011
121 Phrong Turn Oh no, super-powered, inbred cannibals! Our heroes must blend into the background or bore them to death to survive! November 2nd, 2011
122 Phrong Turn Too Stuck in the woods with inbred cannibals and a reality show, which is worse? November 9th, 2011
123 Phrong Turn Three: Left 4 Dead Three Finger is the big star of the 3rd Wrong Turn as he tries to kill a million sub plots. November 16th, 2011
124 Phrong Turn Fore: Hostel The new origins of the Wrong Turners and guess what? It's torture on screen and off! But at least this review has some amazing singing! November 23rd, 2011
125 Human Centiphede 2 Blood and poop in black and white... and that's pretty much it. November 30th, 2011
126 Phredder Aladdin and his friends go ski boarding but The Shredder is there to kill them for breaking the ski hill rules! Or something... December 7th, 2011
127 Disney's Satan Clauslous Yes there is a SATAN CLAUS! Maybe... if you can see him. Merry Christmas HAHAHAHA GET IT!? It's a joke somehow. December 14th, 2011
128 Jack Phroest Jack Frost's parents named him in hopes he'd become a snowman one day. Unfortunately, he just became a lame jokester in a foam suit. December 21st, 2011
129 Jack Phroest 2 What happens when you add Hot Chocolate to Anti Freeze? A new and improved snowman killer who's only weakness is bananas. December 28th, 2011
130 Mortal Phombat: The Journey Phegins The Journey begins and ENDS here with Mortal Kombat: The awful animation begins! January 5th, 2012
Special Mac & Me and Funny Games Vid Commentary Phelan and Allison do a video commentary on the 1st and 3rd episodes of the Phelous... uhhh whatever show. January 11th, 2012
131 Hostel Phostel III Hostel 3 really changes up the Hostel plot and was a complete and wonderful surprise. Phelous loves it about as much as writing about himself in the 3rd person. January 18th, 2012
132 Obscurus Lupa and Phelous Present: Julpa & Phack Obscurus Lupa & Phelous take a look at Birdemic creator, James Nguyen's 1st movie about perfect virtual realities and internet ghosts. January 25th, 2012
133 Phoctoplous Octopus is a movie that is about a terrorist being transported on a nuclear submarine. With a giant mutant octopus from toxic waste cameo. February 1st, 2012
134 Evil Toons An evil cartoon comes to attack live action people...sort of...not really, so it's up to Phelous and Artistdrew to do a crossover! Apparently. February 6th, 2012
135 Phoctoplous 2 Octopus 2 has a yellow eyed demon harbor patrol cop who takes over the body of an octopus to get revenge on his partner who left him to die and a little old and and her stupid dog called Mozart. February 8th, 2012
136 Phelantine A movie that tries to be a mystery despite only giving you one believable suspect and drags everything it does out TO THE MAX! But it DOES have Katherine Heigl as the opening kill. February 15th, 2012
137 PMNT Phorevers The 2003 TMNT meet up with an awful parody of the 1987 TMNT! February 22nd, 2012
138 My Blappy Phalentine To review both the remake and original will take 2 reviewers. Not really but it's a crossover anyway with Obscurus Lupa! February 29th, 2012
139 Mortal Phombat Your Mortal Kombat review is MINE! March 7th, 2012
140 Mortal Phombat 2: Anniphelation Mortal Kombat's sequel annihilates most of it's cast and instead adds countless extra characters in order to make an incoherent mess. March 14th, 2012
141 Phelous & Nostalgia Critic: Child's Play 2 Nostalgia Critic and Phelous are up to child's play again. Will Chucky take over Andy's body this time? Yes, yes he will and the other movies in the series don't exist. March 21st, 2012
142 Silent Phelous: Downphour My mixed feelings on Silent Hill Downpour, it's got some good, some bad, and some that just should have been fixed. March 28th, 2012
143 Mortal Phomedy! Phelous finally reviews some terrible Mortal Kombat parody, Mortal Komedy. April 4th, 2012
144 Killphoser When you wish upon a blue meteor your bulldozer will come to life... with an urge to KILL! May 2nd, 2012
145 Phamityville 4 - The Lamp Escapes Good? Bad? This is the Amityville film with the lamp. May 9th, 2012
146 Mortal Komedy Episode 3 Rayden tells Sub-Zero and Johnny Cage to get out of outworld and learn that another tournament will take place in Outworld and are shocked who the first opponent will be. May 16th, 2012
147 Mortal Kombat Conquest Episode 1: Warrior Eternal In the 1st episode of Konquest Kung Lao decides hats are for losers and Scorpion is an actual scorpion. June 6th, 2012
148 Seventh Moonpie (Across Phelous' Eye) If annoying shaky cam movies shot in the dark with the intention to make you ill are your thing, IT'S SEVENTH MOON! June 13th, 2012
149 MK Conquest - Cold Reality In the review of the 2nd Conquest episode we learn that while they might have messed Scorpion's backstory up, they got Sub-Zero SPOT ON! June 20th, 2012
150 Man's Best Phriend If you ever wanted to see a dog, with acid pee, swallow a cat whole, this is your film! June 27th, 2012
151 Phailaddin Aladdin... just another stupid lamp film. July 4th, 2012
152 Bloodphayne Can't anyone wake themselves up to act in this Uwe Boll masterpiece? July 11th, 2012
153 Bloodphayne 2 Rayne shows us how the west was really ruined forever by Uwe Boll. But hey! At least we find out Billy the Kid was a vampire! July 18th, 2012
154 Bloodphayne 3 Uwe Boll takes BloodRayne into a time period from one of the games AND... turns out about as well as you'd expect. July 25th, 2012
155 Phlubberella Uwe Boll tries again to "comedify" one of his films with some big jokes... yes around that level. August 1st, 2012
156 Mortal Phombat: Immortal Kombat Taja and Siro start aging because Shang Tsung had a really stupid plan that didn't work and the only cure is fan service! August 6th, 2012
157 NC & Phelous - Child's Play 3 Nostalgia Critic and Phelous team up once again to tackle the final Child's Play film. August 22nd, 2012
158 In the Name of the Phelous: A Farmy Farm Tale In the name of Uwe Boll it's his hilarious casting with King Burt Reynolds and his son Jason Statham! August 29th, 2012
159 In the Name of the Phelous: Lundgren 2 The Crisp Dolph Lundgren goes back in time for some reason involving a king and cereal. September 5th, 2012
160 Resident Phelous: Damnation My thoughts on the 2nd CGI Resident Evil film. It's a Leon Sandwich! October 10th, 2012
161 Resident Phelous 6 The good and bad of Resident Evil 6. (Spoiler free) October 17th, 2012
162 Halloween Re-Phake How to completely miss the point of a movie by Rob Zombie. October 24th, 2012
163 Hoboween II Michael Myers doesn't do anything without permission from the ghost of his mom, her white horse and the ghost of himself as a kid. October 31st, 2012
164 Why Watch? 5 The inbred hillbillies go to town... and are clueless about what to actually do. November 7th, 2012
165 Phalloween 6: The Hairbrained Explanation of Michael Myers The horrible night HE cursed having a curse. November 14th, 2012
166 TMNT - Coming Out of Their Minds! Shredder's new hate is music so he tries to ruin the Turtle's concert by singing about it... makes sense. November 21st, 2012
167 TMNT - Gettin' Down and Depressed in Your Town! Turtles you get back in your shells and out of my town and take your depression tour with you! November 28th, 2012
168 The Real Ghostbusters: X-Mas Marks the Spot (aka The Ghostbusters Kill Christmas) The Ghostbusters celebrate Christmas by busting some ghosts... Ghosts of Christmas! December 5th, 2012
169 Sonic Christmas Bust Robotnik tries to take over Christmas as Robotik Claus but Sonic will destroy Christmas before he lets that happen. December 12th, 2012
170 A Phelousy Mario Christmas: Koopa Klaus & The Night Before Cave Christmas Time to take a look at The Super Mario Bros. Super Show episode Koopa Klaus and Super Mario World episode The Night Before Cave Christmas. December 19th, 2012
171 Silent Night... Whatever Night Silent Night, Remake Night? No, not really but it's got a Santa Killer... uhh YAY CHRISTMAS! December 26th, 2012
172 Mortal Kombat Conquest - The Essence Kitana joins the Conquest and we learn she is originally from... a flower? January 16th, 2013
173 Mortal Kombat Conquest - Noob Saibot Siro has become the most prideful Mortal Kombat character, can Noob Saibot teach him his lesson? February 6th, 2013
174 Resident Phelous Retribution (Part 1) Barry is finally in one of these movies! Will he and Jill form team Sandwich or will this be another installment of the Alice show? ...what do you think? March 13th, 2013
175 Resident Phelous Retribution (Part 2) The contradictions are out in full force as we wrap up the 5th installment of the Alice is Awesome series. March 20th, 2013
176 Friday the 13th Part IX: Jason Goes On Vacation (Part 1) Aka the audience goes to see a Friday the 13th film and instead, gets whatever this is.. March 27th, 2013
177 Atop the Phourth Wall - Marvel Universe The Book of the Dead 1&2 Marvel created the book of the dead!? What hell will this unleash on Link...Phelous...? April 1st, 2013
178 Friday the 13th Part IX: Jason Goes On Vacation (Part 2) Jason Voorhees, bouncing here and there and into everyone's bodies. A strange slug than be beyond compare, he is the Jason heart soul... thing. April 3rd, 2013
179 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Top Dumbest Moments 40-21 (Part 1) It's the 40 dumbest moments from the 87 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles cartoon starting with 40 to 21! April 17th, 2013
180 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Top Dumbest Moments 20-1 (Part 2) Float away with the top 20 dumbest moments from the 87 Ninja Turtles cartoon! April 24th, 2013
181 Mortal Kombat Conquest - Debt of the Dragon The Black Dragon pee on the trading post to mark their territory. Siro says kill em all, Kung Lao says LET'S DO NOTHING! May 8th, 2013
182 Silent Phelous: Remerlation 2D (Part 1) To try and be more faithful to the game it creates giant holes in the plot from the 1st movie and forgot the SILENT part of Silent Hill. May 22nd, 2013
183 Silent Phelous: Remerlaton 2D (Part 2) The terrible mess that is Silent Hill Revelation's plot keeps growing and only one hero can save us: Pyramid Head! May 29th, 2013
184 Mortal Kombat Conquest - Undying Dream In this episode of Conquest Taja meets some abomination that is her non speaking role father and no one has a clue what they're doing. June 12th, 2013
185 Emoticonly (The New Face of Boredom) An emoticon killer with people from YouTube!? SCARY!!! June 19th, 2013
186 Mortal Kombat Conquest - Quan Chi Quan Chi sends his three angels, aka barely clothed women, to make Kung Lao and friends turn into real jerks. June 26th, 2013
187 Dr. Jeklous and Mr. Phyde The only animated version of the story of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde makes death such fun... or more disturbing, you decide! July 3rd, 2013
188 Mortal Kombat Conquest - Unholy Alliance Quan Chi and Shang Tsung form an Unholy Alliance instead of a Deadly one, which is far less effective, even if it does make Kung Lao meet evil incarnate. July 15th, 2013
189 Deadly Phriend Wes Craven's film about the love between a Tasmanian Devil robot, a computer chip brain girl and a plank of wood gets injections of A Nightmare on Elm St by the studio. July 17th, 2013
190 Phelous's Ladder Jacob's Ladder is a great film that was one of the inspirations for Silent Hill. The film makes Phelous come to a realization after his 5 years of making reviews. August 7th, 2013
191 Phailaddin and the Adventure of No Time A bookworm must travel through time with Aladdin to stop an evil sorceress from hiding the magic lamp in random locations and times. September 30th, 2013
192 Phailaddin and the Adventure of No Time Aladdin and Paige wish a bunch of historical figures into worse people while trying to make greedy wishes in one of the worst excuses for an animated movie. October 2nd, 2013
193 Phelous' Garfield Halloween There may be more ghosts around Garfield than expected in his Halloween Adventure. October 16th, 2013
194 The Phelous Halloween Show Time to take a look at the newer Garfield series, The Garfield Show's 2 Halloween themed episodes: The Haunted House and Which Witch. October 30th, 2013
Special The Time Machine (I Found at a Yard Sale) Part 1 A movie that insists on showing you all the stuff that should be cut with acting and effects trying to out do Birdemic. November 27th, 2013
Special The Time Machine (I Found at a Yard Sale) Part 2 The amazing tale of 2 almost living beings continue as they would rather fade away than kiss each and rather go find treasure than continue the plot. December 4th, 2013
195 Phelous vs. the Movies - Psycho Santa Oh that Santa, he's so crazy! But not more so than our protagonists as they bravely drive to a Christmas party telling the awful tales of Santa's deeds. December 11th, 2013
196 The Gingerdead Man Gary Busey turns into a cookie. Merry Gingerbreadmas Butthorns! December 18th, 2013
197 He-Man and She-Ra Christmas Special Can Christmas Skeletor really save the children? December 25th, 2013
198 Mortal Kombat Conquest - Thicker Than Blood Siro has a brother who he lost Eva Mendes to but what neither of them know is he's far more in love with Scorpion than them. February 12th, 2014
199 Birdemic 2: The Resurrection Birdemic 2, the sequel that almost forgets it's a sequel despite having the characters return. Why did the Giant Jumbo Jellyfish attacked!? February 19th, 2014
200 Birdemic 2: The Resurrection Part 2 Birds finally show up in James Nguyen's remake of Sunset Blvd... or the 1st Birdemic, something like that. February 26th, 2014
201 Mortal Kombat Conquest - Shadow of a Doubt It's purple power on Conquest with Rain sort of being here and Mileena getting a Kitana face transplant via a magic spear. March 5th, 2014
202 The Gingerdead Man 2: Passion of the Crust A cookie is on the loose at a movie studio? Will anyone survive? Will anyone watching care? March 19th, 2014
203 Cabin Fever 3 Cabin Fever really surprises us all this time around with a really thoughtful piece about... idiots getting infected with a flesh eating virus. March 26th, 2014
204 The Gingerdead Man 3 Somehow the "jokes" go even further downhill and the Gingerdead Man takes a lot of breaks to watch a Carrie Remake. April 16th, 2014
205 In the Name of the King 3 Uwe Boll tries to time travel back to a time we cared and delivers yet another pointless romp through time with another outdoor king and the brother from Prison Break. April 30th, 2014
206 Mortal Kombat Conquest - Twisted Truths The "Great" Johnny Cage shows up to become instantly in love with Taja while Siro is getting super serious with a woman who hates him. But will Reptile ruin BOTH relationships!? May 7th, 2014
207 MKC - Festival of Death The best festival in all of Konquest Land shows up but Kung Lao is too busy with his new girl friend to go. Though she might sneak off to go on her own... May 14th, 2014
208 Prom Night 2: Hello Mary Lou The sequel to Prom Night actually only had that label forced on it and features A GHOST! May 21st, 2014
209 Prom Night 3: The Last Kiss Prom Night 3 was made by the same people as the 2nd... and couldn't feel any further from that being the case. June 4th, 2014
210 Prom Night 3: The Last Kiss Part 2 The adventures of a cheating boy and his ghost continue as the cover up more murder then go to hell. June 11th, 2014
211 Beauty & the Beast Part 1 A tale retold many times... mostly because of the Disney version but few can really capture how Beauty's lights were on but no one was home, her father being such an ass and the Beast being a goomba warthog. July 23rd, 2014
212 Beauty & the Beast Part 2 If you threaten to kill both her and her father for picking a rose Beauty will pretty much be in love with you right away. July 30th, 2014
213 Lion & the King Part 1 A rip off movie on a Playstation disc with something that barely qualifies as animation from a German company called: Dingo Pictures. August 20th, 2014
214 Lion & the King Part 2 Character models ripped off from the Lion King must be sort of animated to find diamonds. Make sure to find out all the shocking twists in this part like fathers are your father. August 27th, 2014
215 Mortal Kombat Conquest - The Serpent and the Ice Sub-Zero and Scorpion finally square off in what is often considered the best episode of Conquest... of course though, it's still Konquest. September 3rd, 2014
216 The Grudge How does The Grudge hold up to the originals Ju-On: The Grudge and a dab of Ju-On: The Curse? September 17th, 2014
217 Beauty & the Beast G2 Part 1 The 2nd Beauty and the Beast by Golden Films doesn't waste as much time on the father. It wastes it on 3 ghosts that fly into the storybook. November 5th, 2014
218 Beauty & the Beast G2 Part 2 The comic relief ghosts reveal they are actually the Beast's victims forced to roam the Earth until they get him laid. November 12th, 2014
219 Wrong Turn 6: Last Resort You should praise inbred people for they are superior to you in every way. Also anywhere there is a pool is now a resort. December 3rd, 2014
220 Cricket on the Hearth Part 1 This cricket was supposed to bring balance to the holidays, not destroy them! If you ever see a cricket on the hearth, RUN! December 24th, 2014
221 To All a Goodnight Another silly Santa Slasher! The absolute perfect Christmas film, but who's the REAL Santa!? ...you'll probably know immediately. December 31st, 2014

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