(We see Chester sitting in a comfy chair in some room as the tune "We Wish You A Merry Christmas plays.)
Chester:
(speaking calmly) Greetings, my friends, and welcome to a "Bummy Christmas Review." (Cut to title card with "Bummy Christmas Reviews", then back to Chester)
It's time we take a look at "National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation." (Cut to title card of it, back to Chester)
Say, remember when John Hughes was funny? So does this movie.
This film centers around a family man played by Chevy Chase.
Hey, remember when Chevy Chase was funny? So does this movie.
Who has a charming family of a wife who's only known for these films, that Juliette Lewis chick who we never see anymore, and that "Big Bang Theory" tool.
It appears that after having years of bad vacations they have finally decided to have one vacation there at home.
I had a vacation at my home once.
It's not easy renovating a can of coffee.
So they invite over all the people who auditioned for "Everybody Loves Raymond," even one who actually got on, and they try to have a merry Christmas with absolutely no comedic possibilities.
Which for many critics at the time is exactly what happened.
But the glue of the movie seems to be Chevy Chase.
He plays your everyday likable man who's constantly trying to cheat on his wife.
And Beverly D'Angelo plays the everyday wife who hasn't divorced him for some reason.
We also have Randy Quaid whose smell actually penetrates the movie screen.
And of course his family: The mother from "Tazmania," the stand-by for Pugsley Addams, and Newt's sister. (pauses) No, seriously, that's Newt's sister. Go IMDB it.
(loud whisper) They're like identical!
I keep forgetting which one's waiting for Santa Claus and which one's waiting for the belly-busting monsters.
Through hijinks, hilarity, and all sorts of funniness, "National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation" shows where the real value in a family Christmas vacation lies.
In a terrible man who's mean to his family and always wishes to get away from them even though he constantly brings them closer.
I know that doesn't make any sense, but in a way doesn't Christmas make no sense either? ...No.
This is Chester A. Bum saying... Don't go away, Christmas! I wanna stay in this room!