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Jack

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Jack: Okay.
 
Jack: Okay.
   
NC (voiceover): We see him break his desk—Ha-ha, bet you didn’t see that one coming, ha-ha—as his mother looks over old pictures of him while…blowing bubbles? ([[Return of the Nostalgic Commercials#Bubble Thing|FUCKING BUBBLES!]]) Um, does she always do this when she’s nostalgic, or is she just high as a kite? I guess I would be, too, if my ten-year-old was a middle-aged Robin Williams.
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NC (voiceover): We see him break his desk—Ha-ha, bet you didn’t see that one coming, ha-ha—as his mother looks over old pictures of him while…blowing bubbles?
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NC (voiceover) [[Return of the Nostalgic Commercials#Bubble Thing|FUCKING BUBBLES!]]
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NC (voiceover): Um, does she always do this when she’s nostalgic, or is she just high as a kite? I guess I would be, too, if my ten-year-old was a middle-aged Robin Williams.
   
 
NC: (as Karen) Whenever I look over photos, I like to view them with confetti. (He throws some confetti in the air) Whimsy!
 
NC: (as Karen) Whenever I look over photos, I like to view them with confetti. (He throws some confetti in the air) Whimsy!
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NC: (removes his hands from his face) I did not just hear THAT!
 
NC: (removes his hands from his face) I did not just hear THAT!
   
NC (voiceover): Okay, Ford Coppola, quick lesson on boys…seeing how you clearly never were one. Boys don’t ''ask ''about this stuff. We just act like we know it and horribly make fun of the ''other'' dumb boys who actually ask about this stuff. And, of course, boys looking at naked women is totally cool, but then when actual ''girls'' come around, “EEEWWW, gross! Cooties! Eeewww!”
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NC (voiceover): Okay, Ford Coppola, quick lesson on boys…seeing how you clearly never were one. Boys don’t ''ask ''about this stuff. We just act like we know it and horribly make fun of the ''other'' dumb boys who actually ask about this stuff. And of course, boys looking at naked women is totally cool, but then when actual ''girls'' come around, “EEEWWW, gross! Cooties! Eeewww!”
   
 
(The next day, Lucy and Jane arrive at the foot of the tree where the treehouse is, and Jack and Louis come out to meet them from above)
 
(The next day, Lucy and Jane arrive at the foot of the tree where the treehouse is, and Jack and Louis come out to meet them from above)
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(Back to the movie)
 
(Back to the movie)
   
NC (voiceover): So he gets depressed and never goes outside to play with his friends. God, I haven’t seen him this low since “[[Popeye]].” But the kids keep asking, hoping one of these days, he’ll finally come out again.
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NC (voiceover): So he gets depressed and never goes outside to play with his friends. God, I haven’t seen him this low since “[[Popeye]].” But the kids keep asking, hoping one of these days he’ll finally come out again.
   
 
Boy #4: Jack’s Mother?
 
Boy #4: Jack’s Mother?
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