Home Alone 2: Lost in New York

Home Alone 2: Lost in New York
Aired	December 19, 2017
Running time	45:13
Previous review	A Muppet Family Christmas
Next review	Star Wars: The Last Jedi
Link	http://channelawesome.com/home-alone-2-lost-in-new-york-nostalgia-critic/

(After the intro, we see NC in his couch, looking not exactly pleased)

NC: Hello, I'm the Nostalgia Critic. I remember it so you don't have to. Well, it's Christmas Eve, and that means meeting up with your friends and loved ones. (nods) And trying to stop them from killing each other. Especially when your friends and loved ones are as polar opposite as they can get!

(Cut to reveal Aunt Despair, Uncle Lies (still with a pipe and wearing an obvious wig) and Malcolm on the left side of the Christmas table. Aunt Despair is pouring some gin in her glass)

Malcolm: Uncle Lies? Aunt Despair? Can I have some water tonight?

Uncle Lies: Well, I suppose you've been good enough this year. Honey, why don't you share some of yours?

Aunt Despair: (gives Malcolm a bottle of gin) Here you go. (pats him on the head)

(On the right side, there are cheerful Chester A. Bum, Doe (Heather Reusz) and Little Girl (Tamara))

Chester: Oh, now, that's no way to treat a child!

Doe: Yeah! Why don't you raise yours like we raise ours? (hugs Little Girl)

Little Girl: Why, I'm pretty sure they did raise me before I got abandoned in the Balto review.

Aunt Despair: Mmm, no, that wasn't you.

Little Girl: Pretty sure it was.

Uncle Lies: No, we remember the children we abandon.

Chester: Do you?

NC: (rubs his hands) Well, I don't know about you, but I sure am excited for our Christmas meal.

Malcolm: Yeah, where is it? We've been waiting forever.

Uncle Lies: Now, son, don't make us abandon you like we did her.

Doe: But you just said...

NC: The meal's taking a while, because it's being specially delivered. Trust me, you only want an expert to deal with something so perfectly Christmassy!

Chester: Well, as long as it's edible, I'm good.

Doe: (nudges him slightly) Honey...

Chester: Okay, it doesn't have to be edible! (Chester, Doe and Little Girl chuckle)

Aunt Despair: That explains why your kid looks like she ate chimney.

Little Girl: (still smiling) It tasted like dying.

Doe: Well, at least we know where our kid is!

Aunt Despair: What are you even talking a- (slowly turns her head to notice Malcolm is not in his chair) Oh, now I get it.

Uncle Lies: Hey, boy! Stop eating that glue and save some for me!

Malcolm: (offscreen; drowsily) I feel colors...

Chester: Parents of the year. (crosses arms)

Doe: You won't even share!

Aunt Despair: You said something over there, pubic wig?

NC: (interrupts them by grabbing a remote) Hey! Why don't we watch a movie? (Malcolm sits back, still junked up) The perfect Christmas interaction where we don't have to have any interaction!

(He presses a button, and after a static, we're shown the title of Home Alone 2: Lost in New York)

Aunt Despair (vo): Home Alone 2?

Aunt Despair: You couldn't even put on Home Alone 1? (Her cigarette falls from her mouth)

Malcolm: (drowsily) Ooh! I love this movie.

Uncle Lies: You do?

Little Girl: Me, too!

Doe: I thought most people only like the first one.

NC: (takes a reindeer-shaped cup) Exactly. They've seen it so many times, it's practically background noise. But everyone has interesting thoughts about Home Alone 2.

(The poster of the original Home Alone is shown, along with an image of Kevin)

NC (vo): You see, when the original came out in 1990, it was huge. It played at #1 for 12 weeks, and turned a relatively unknown child actor, Macaulay Culkin, into a megastar.

(Clips from Home Alone 2 are now shown)

NC (vo): So, not surprisingly, two years later, a sequel came about, giving everybody the same comedy they grew to love.

NC: And I do mean the same comedy.

NC (vo): Many people were angered at how much repeating there was, reusing the same jokes, scenarios, even teaching the same lessons that was learned in the original. Macaulay Culkin and director Chris Columbus even mock it in the first film's commentary.

(A snippet of Culkin and Columbus' commentary of the first film is heard)

Chris Columbus (vo): John Hughes said he'd write this on the weekend. I wonder how long it took for him to write the second one. (Culkin starts laughing) It's a little bit of cut and paste, and boom, you're done. Sequel, bam. (Several Photoshopped images of what Columbus describes are shown)

NC (vo): But much like Ghostbusters II, people totally forgot they hated it, because...

NC: (looks around for a bit before shrugging) Come on!

NC (vo): Well, I'm here to see if there's any validity to that "Come on!", and look at a movie that seems to divide many...

NC: ...but at least can serve as a harmless distraction. (drinks his drink)

Aunt Despair: I'm only watching this for Sharknado star, John Heard.

Chester: Give it a chance. This is the greatest movie I've ever seen in my life, and I don't say that often.

Doe: It's true.

NC: Let's take a gander at Home Alone 2.

(The film's opening credits roll, exactly the same as the first film's opening credits, as a split-screen of the two films reveals, also happening with the first scene)

NC (vo): We start off this rollercoaster of variety with practically the same music against the same credits with the same exterior shot followed by the same interior shot.

NC: Okay, I know you're trying to establish a style, but when you...

NC (vo): ...don't even need to move the tripods from your last shoot...

NC: ...you might wanna mix it up a bit!

(The McCallister family are shown packing up for their vacation)

NC (vo): Hopefully, everyone's character traits are repeated, too!

(Uncle Frank is shown taking a coke can from his son Fuller. The caption shows "Bed Wetter")

Uncle Frank: Hey, easy on the fluids, pal.

(Buzz is shown walking past one of his sisters. The caption shows "Bully")

Buzz: Now you can be a skag with a slightly darker shade of skin.

(We cut to a later scene of Uncle Frank scolding Kevin. The caption shows "Cheapskate")

Uncle Frank: You'd better not wreck my trip, you little sourpuss. Your dad's paying good money for it.

(We cut to a later scene of Kevin in the third floor. The caption shows "Robot")

Kevin: And you know what? If I had my own money, I'd go on my own vacation, alone.

NC: Yeah, okay. Let's address what's arguably one of the biggest problems with the film: Macaulay Culkin's performance sucks. (Beat) But it's not really his fault.

(Footage of Kevin in the first film is shown, as well as several images describing Culkin's career)

NC (vo): He already played up the kid who has to act like an adult in the first film, and he immediately became the biggest star in the world. And that's not exaggerating. He was everywhere for a while.

NC: That kind of attention so quickly, so young, is gonna result in this kind of performance.

NC (vo): The "I don't care, I'm cool as shit now" performance.

Kevin: (various scenes) He didn't mean what he said. He was just sucking up to you. / At first, you look kind of scary, but when I think about it, it's not so bad. / ...without any of you guys, and I'd have the most fun of my whole life.

NC (vo): It would happen to you, it would happen to me.

NC: It would happen to anyone. There's really no blame, it's just the situation. (Beat) With that said, let's make fun of this like hell!

(We cut back to the introduction scenes, showing Kevin trying out his Talkboy as his mother Kate is packing)

Kate: Honey, are you packed yet?

Kevin: (speaks through the Talkboy) Yes.

(He presses the Talkboy's play button)

Talkboy: Yes.

NC: (as Kevin) I'm trying to see if I can literally phone in my performance.

Kate: Did you see what Grandma Penelope sent you for the trip? (brings out an inflatable clown) An inflatable clown to play with in the pool.

Kevin: (feeling unexcited) How exciting.

NC: I can't tell. Are you excited? It's eerily similar to all the times you actually are excited!

(Cut to the later scenes of Kevin at Duncan's Toy Chest)

Kevin: Merry Christmas, Kevin. / This is the greatest accident of my life. (Cut back to the earlier scene) How exciting. Why do we have to go to Florida? There's no Christmas trees in Florida.

Kate: Kevin, what is it with you and Christmas trees?

(The TV cuts to an advertisement for the Plaza Hotel, which Kevin begins recording on his Talkboy)

TV: ...stay at the world-renowned Plaza Hotel.

NC: Yeah, most of this opening dialogue, you can just replace with...

(The intro scene is dubbed with NC's dialogue)

NC (vo; as Kevin): Why can't setup for second or third act pay off? (as Kate) Bad joke to make it look like we're not setting up for the second or third act payoff. (as Peter) Honey, did you set up for second or third act payoff? (as Kate) Segue to other setup for second or third act payoff to make you forget about this setup for second or third act payoff.

NC: Speaking of which...

NC (vo): Kevin has to grab his tie while his uncle sings in the shower, and decides to record it. I do hope the dollar store microphone on that thing picks up the clear-ass audio both inside and outside the room.

(As Kevin records on his Talkboy Uncle Frank singing "Cool Jerk" in the shower, Uncle Frank stops and notices Kevin inside)

Uncle Frank: Get out of here, you nosy little pervert, or I'm gonna slap you silly!

NC: Ironically, Macaulay Culkin might be the only person from Hollywood not told that yet. (Images of famous people accused of sexual misconduct (Harvey Weinstein, Kevin Spacey, Matt Lauer, Al Franken, Charlie Rose and Dustin Hoffman) are shown)

(We cut to Kevin and Buzz performing as part of a choir at a Christmas pageant)

NC (vo): He performs at a Christmas pageant with his brother Buzz, who proceeds to make fun of him.

(As Kevin sings his solo, Buzz puts two Christmas candles next to Kevin's ears, causing the entire audience, except Kevin's parents, to laugh)

NC: Oh, these easily amused pageant goers! Look! The letter B!

("B" is shown in a caption. The audience laughs harder)

NC: You're so ready to watch Home Alone 3.

NC (vo): Kevin finds out what Buzz is doing and punches him. But because this is a Family Matters episode now, it has to go more over-the-top.

(Kevin punches Buzz, causing the entire choir of children to fall to the ground. One of the Christmas tree props on the stage falls down and hits the piano player, knocking her to the ground. A clip from Family Matters is shown)

Urkel: Did I do that?

NC (vo): Funny enough, this reveals that the only character in this sequel that's strangely evolved is Buzz.

NC: I know that sounds strange, seeing how bullies are always the most underdeveloped characters, but he legitimately grows as a character!

NC (vo): He's still a bully, but now he knows how to manipulate, his vocabulary is shot up, and he seems wittier and funnier.

Buzz: (various scenes) My prank was immature and ill-timed. / Merry Christmas, indeed. / What a troubled young man.

NC (vo): The only downgrade is, when he is mean, his wordage is a lot more, um...Disney Channel.

Buzz: (whispers to Kevin) Beat that, you little trout-sniffer.

NC (vo): Ooh! Trout-sniffer. That's much more intimidating than...

Buzz: (from the first film) [I wouldn't let you sleep in my room] if you were growing on my ass!

NC (vo): But, hey. If you're not a fan of how the language in this one is more cleaned-up than the last one, don't worry. There's plenty of more shit repeated from the first film!

Kevin: (to Kate, in the third floor) If I had my own money, I'd go on my own vacation, alone.

Kate: Well, you got your wish last year. Maybe you'll get it again this year.

NC: It all depends on how lazy and rushed the writer is to get his paycheck.

(The next morning, Peter and Kate wake up with a start, having slept in again)

NC (vo): Oh, you're in luck.

Peter and Kate: WE DID IT AGAIN! (run straight to the camera and scream) AAAAAAHHH! (run out of the room)

NC: You hear that, wall we're randomly screaming at?! UGGGGHH!

(Once more, the McCallisters are rushing to their van. But this time, they didn't forget to take Kevin and take him to the airport...only for Kevin to lose them there)

NC (vo): Speed up the film, play Williams' "Nutcracker" music again, rinse, repeat, water down. This time, Kevin makes it at least as far as the airport with his family, but they get separated, and Kevin gets on the wrong plane.

Ticket Agent: We have to close up here. They're ready to go.

Flight Attendant 1: He dropped his boarding pass.

Kevin: This plane can't leave.

Ticket Agent: Board him, but make sure he locates his family before you leave him.

NC: Well, 9\11 hasn't happened yet, so go ahead!

Aunt Despair: I have some theories on why 9\11 really happened.

Doe: Really?

Chester: Do tell.

NC: Oh, look! Another possibly debatable funny scene!

(Kevin goes inside another plane and sits next to a man)

NC (vo): Yeah, watch this over and see if you snicker at something a little odd.

Kevin: (to a man) Have you ever been to Florida?

(The man starts speaking in French, which confuses Kevin as hell and makes him turn his head to the camera slowly)

NC: Now, don't get me wrong, this doesn't seem that funny.

NC (vo): Whatever. He looks at the camera because a guy in a different language won't shut up.

NC: But realistically, it's the most nonsensical awkward moment!

NC (vo): We know he's supposed to be looking at the audience, but in this situation, there is no audience. So imagine you're talking to me, and I suddenly just went...

(NC, with a blank stare, slowly turns his head to his right, and then immediately turns it back)

NC: That'd be super weird!

NC (vo): And why is this guy still talking? He knows Kevin doesn't speak French. Does he think he made a friend? A friend who slowly shades you by looking at the airplane set with more space than any plane ever built?

NC: It's actually kind of hilarious, just not at all for the intended reasons!

(Cut to the plane with the McCallister family on its board)

Kate: Oh, I just have that feeling.

Peter: We have everybody. There's nothing to worry about.

(Kevin's plane is shown landing at its destination)

Kate: Yeah, you're right. You're right. We're fine.

(The logo for American Airlines company is shown with its "slogan")

Announcer (Malcolm): American Airlines. Losing your luggage and your kids.

(Having landed, too, Kevin sees the sight of New York City in an airport window and rushes to the attendant)

NC (vo): So Kevin, of course, ends up in New York and checks to see where he is.

Kevin: What city is that over there?

Flight Attendant 2: That's New York, sir.

(Kevin widens his eyes in shock)

Kevin: (whispering) Yikes, I did it again! (continues to stare)

NC: (hand on cheek) Anyone else feel like Culkin's blank stares are trying to eat your soul?

(The clip of Kevin staring is shown to a demonic music)

NC (vo; in a deep voice): You taste like innocence. (normal) Let's do this schtick again.

Kevin: My family's in Florida, and I'm in New York. (realizes) My family's...in Florida...

NC: Oh, come on! In the original, he had to...

(The clip from the first movie is shown, showing Kevin pondering about his relatives and him being away from them)

NC (vo): ...really think about it, dealing with the fact that his family was gone, but then think about all the mean things they said to him!

NC: Here, it just looks like he's suddenly thought of his residual check!

Kevin: My family's in Florida, and I'm in New York. (As he realizes, the sound of "Cha-ching!" is heard) My family's...in Florida...

(Kevin starts going around the city and taking pictures of it, finishing with going on top of then-present twin towers of the World Trade Center)

NC (vo): Speaking of money, he uses all the cash in his dad's bag he accidentally took to see New York. He even checks outsides that are...um...uncomfortable, to say the least.

Aunt Despair: You see? It was all conspiracy by the Satanists, which is why you can see the face in the smoke.

(Before Doe can answer, NC interrupts)

NC: Hey, look!

(Harry Lime and Marv Merchants, the Wet Bandits from the last film, are shown inside a truck full of fish)

NC (vo): The Goodfeathers! Yep, Kevin passes by a truck the escaped convicts snuck into, and their sequel material is much to be a-scared of.

Harry: Smell that?

Marv: (sniffs and grins) Yeah.

Harry: Know what that is?

Marv: Fish.

Harry: It's freedom.

Marv: No, it's fish.

NC: Sorry. Matthew Broderick...

(The shot of Nick Tatopoulos saying "That's a lot of fish" from Godzilla (1998) is shown)

NC (vo): ...will master this routine six years later.

NC: There's no need in trying to top him.

(Harry and Marv walk in the city streets)

Harry: We get ourselves a couple of phony passports, and we hightail it to some foreign country.

Marv: Arizona?

NC: Oh, I do hope there's more "secretary from Ghostbusters reboot" material with him.

(Harry and Marv, as well as Kevin, go into a crowd of people, but don't notice each other. They turn their heads to make a double take, but then Marv bumps into a woman)

NC (vo): Speaking of coincidence, they all happen to be in New York at the exact same time, but Kevin just misses them passing in the street, causing Marv to bump into someone.

Marv: (to a woman) Pardonne-moi, mon chéri.

(The woman slaps him on the cheek and leaves)

Harry: (bumps Marv out of the way) Serves you right. Come on, let's go.

NC: Why did that anger him so much?

NC (vo): This is a guy who breaks into God knows how many houses and almost commits child murder, yet speaking French to a woman was too far?

NC: Imagine how he'd react to this guy!

(The scene of a French man speaking to Kevin is shown, followed by a scene from Goodfellas showing Tommy DeVito (also played by Joe Pesci) shooting Spider)

Tommy DeVito: That's what the fucking world is coming to. How do ya like that?

(Back to Home Alone 2, Kevin notices the Plaza Hotel and decides to visit it, but sees a pigeon lady)

NC (vo): Kevin makes his way to the famous Plaza Hotel, but not before coming across a...disturbing character?

(As the menacing music plays, the pigeon lady, played by Brenda Fricker, turns to Kevin and looks at him)

Kevin: Sick!

NC: ...Why?

(The footage of Old Man Marley from the first film is shown)

NC (vo): I mean, okay, this is obviously a retread of the old man gimmick from the first one, but he had a creepy backstory and could at times look very scary.

(We are shown the pigeon lady again)

NC (vo): This is a Susan Boyle and Mrs. Doubtfire hybrid! She doesn't look the least bit frightening!

NC: Is it because she has birds? Is that it? Birds aren't scary!

NC (vo): You're literally feeding them in a later scene!

NC: If it were bats, it'd be scary. If it was insects, it'd be scary. If it was rats, anything but birds... There is literally...

(The bird woman from Mary Poppins is shown)

NC (vo): ...a Mary Poppins song about this scenario! It is famously charming and not the least bit intimidating! Who knows? Maybe it was meant to be a horror film.

(The bird woman's eyes are replaced by the Eyes of Sauron with the caption "FEED THE BIRDS, OR THEY'LL FEED ON YOU". Back to the movie, Kevin goes inside the Plaza Hotel)

NC (vo): He finally makes it to the hotel, where he comes across a... (coughs) interesting cameo.

(While walking across the hallway, Kevin meets then-owner of the hotel, Donald J. Trump himself)

Kevin: Excuse me, where's the lobby?

Donald Trump: Down the hall and to the left.

Kevin: Thanks. (They part ways)

NC: There goes a man who looks like he'd lose by three million votes.

Kevin: Excuse me, where's the lobby?

Donald Trump: (overdubbed by 2005's...) Grab 'em by the pussy.

NC: (astonished) Donald!

Malcolm: Auntie, isn't that a man we should be talking about?

NC: (waving hands around) Nope! No! No! There is no reason to talk about him at all!

Chester: We feel like that guy got into poli-mi-tics.

Doe: (chuckling) Surely, there is no harm in discussing poli-mi-tics over the holidays!

Uncle Lies: I completely agree. I'll start-

NC: Tim Curry, save the day!!

(The hotel's concierge Mr. Hector (Tim Curry) is first shown as the Hallelujah Chorus plays out)

Little Girl: (gasps) Ooh, we love him!

Chester: Me, too!

Aunt Despair: For every one star of movie he's in, he's the reason it got that one star.

NC: (smiles) Tim Curry. We can all agree on him.

NC (vo): I'm not kidding. He is, once again, the best part of the movie. Even teaming him with Rob Schneider can't distract how awesome he is. He plays the concierge, who suspects Kevin of suckering them with a stolen card and phony story. Mostly because their operators are idiots.

(Over the phone, the operator hears Kevin's slowed and toned down voice recorded on Talkboy introducing himself as Peter McCallister)

Talkboy: I'd like a hotel room, please...

Operator: (on the phone) Yes.

Talkboy: ...with an extra large bed, a TV, and one of those little refrigerators you have to open with a key.

NC: To be fair, that slowed-down voice would work a lot better if he just added two words.

Talkboy: Howdy-do. This is Peter McCallister.

NC (vo; as Talkboy): I'm drunk.

NC: See? Suddenly, it seems plausible!

(Kevin then goes to Mrs. Stone, the clerk, at her desk)

Kevin: Reservation for McCallister?

Mrs. Stone: A reservation for yourself?

Kevin: A kid going into a hotel, making a reservation? I don't think so.

NC: It's that thing he said in the last movie! (takes out a hammer and hits the camera) Did you get that?! DID YOU GET THAT?!?

Kevin: (gives Peter's credit card to Mrs. Stone) He gave me his credit card so I won't get into mischief. And, ma'am, sometimes I do get into mischief.

(The clip from a web series :DRYVRS (an episode "Just Me In The House By Myself") is shown, showing grown-up Kevin screaming in agony)

Kevin: (shrugs) We all do.

(Kevin is shown his hotel room)

NC (vo): It, of course, works, and Kevin enjoys all the perks of luxury.

(To the song "Jingle Bell Rock" by Bobby Helms, Kevin walks up to the pool, wearing slippers and trunks, holding a towel and ready to dive)

NC (vo): By the way, show off hands...

NC: ...how many people, when they hear this song, instantly think of Kevin in swim trunks... (Everyone's hands, including NC's, go up) Yeah, me, too. Stupid movie.

(In an earlier scene, Cedric the bellman, played by Rob Schneider, was given a Fruit Stripe instead of some money by Kevin)

NC (vo): Give the film credit that even Rob Schneider gets a few decent laughs, mostly involving a misunderstanding about tipping.

(Cut to a later scene; Cedric is at Kevin's door)

Kevin: I'm sorry. You wanted a tip.

Cedric: I still have some... (takes a chewed-out piece of gum out of his mouth) tip left over.

Kevin: (shows a bundle of cash) No tip? Okay.

Cedric: No, no, no, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait... (Kevin closes the door on him)

NC: (as Cedric) That could make, like, five of my movies!

(Kevin is shown watching a gangster movie, Angels with Even Filthier Souls, on TV)

NC (vo): Yep, we're even doing this bit again.

Girlfriend: It's me, Johnny.

Johnny: I could smell you getting off the elevator.

NC: All anybody seems to watch in these movies are these films (Angels with Filthy Souls), The Grinch, and foreign It's a Wonderful Life! I'd say "branch out, movie", but why start now?

Girlfriend: I was singing at the Blue Monkey last night.

Johnny: You was here...and you were smooching with my brother!

NC: Actually, a part of me wishes I could just watch this film series as opposed to these Home Alones. Somebody crowdfund to get these movies made! We gotta see them in their entirety!

Johnny: I believe you. (takes out his gun) But my Tommy gun don't!

Girlfriend: (shocked) You're the only duck in my pond!

Johnny: Get down on your knees and tell me you love me.

NC: Whoa! Family-friendly, my ass!

(After telling his girlfriend to get out before he counts to three, Johnny shoots and kills her before saying "three")

NC (vo): He mows down Harley Quinn in a bullet-filled bloodbath.

NC: But don't worry, parents! He didn't swear while doing it. (gives a thumbs-up as the caption "Family Friendly" is shown)

(Kevin takes out Peter's wallet and looks at the family photo, then sadly observes the view of New York. The movie's original song "Christmas Star" plays)

NC (vo): Oh. Yeah. This feels earned.

Kevin: (thinking) Good night, Mom.

(As "Christmas Star" continues, it dissolves to Kate at the window in Florida)

NC (vo): I hope we have fun learning the exact same goddamn lesson we learned in the exact same goddamn way in the first one.

NC: You know, there's a difference between "tearjerking" and "tear jerks".

NC (vo): "Tearjerking" is what the first film did.

NC: "Tear jerks" are what the producers...

NC (vo): ...of this film are, thinking they could do the exact same thing again!

(The elevator door opens to reveal Mr. Hector nonchalantly leaning against the elevator's wall and then walking up to Kevin's room)

NC (vo): Meanwhile, Curry, in a totally not-creepy way, stalks a little kid's room.

Mr. Hector: (knocks on door) Housekeeping.

NC: (confused by the intonation) As Dr. Strangelove.

NC (vo): Come on, Curry, we know you can do better accents than that.

Herkermer Homolka (from Congo): (audio) No, no! The diamonds are here!

(Kevin brings out an inflatable clown his mom gave to him, turns the tap on, hides the inflatable behind the curtain and controls it with ropes, and plays the recording of Uncle Frank singing "Cool Jerk" and scolding him to make it look like the man is washing in the shower)

NC (vo): Kevin sets up in seconds what would take a solid hour in reality: a ploy to fool the, uh... Huh.

(The shadow of a inflatable in the curtain moves its hands very unrealistically)

NC: And that's when every adult in the audience said, "Okay, we're not coming back. This is the course we're doing. It's shutting on my kids for a while, so just count your blessings."

Talkboy: Get out of here, you nosy little pervert, or I'm gonna slap you silly!

(Upon seeing this, Mr. Hector drops his jaw and runs away, hitting his leg on the stool in the process)

NC (vo; as Mr. Hector): You all better get the irony that I'm frightened by a clown!

(The clip of Pennywise doing his trademark laugh from IT (1990) is shown)

NC (vo): The next morning, Curry tries to apologize for his actions.

(Mr. Hector walks up to Kevin and bends down)

Kevin: Is my transportation here?

Mr. Hector: Out in front, sir. A limosuine and a...piz-za.

NC: Okay, can we just do a count of every average word made amazing by Tim Curry's weird pronunciations?

Mr. Hector: Piz-za.

NC: (as Mr. Hector) Piz-za.

Mr. Hector: Piz-za.

(The caption "Your word has been CURRIED" and a face of Mr. Hector laughing appear to a ding, with Pennywise's "Wa-ha!" heard)

NC (vo): Oh, Tim.

NC: I love you and your Tim...Curry-sma.

Mr. Hector: I do hope your father understands that I was simply checking the room.

Kevin: If some guy looked at you in the shower, would you ever want to see him again?

NC: (as Mr. Hector) You clearly haven't watched my other movies. (The image of Dr. Frank-N-Furter from The Rocky Horror Picture Show walking out of the shower is shown)

Kevin: Bye.

Mr. Hector: Have a lovely day.

("Your word has been CURRIED" appears again)

NC (vo): I will also give credit that his film has the greatest-looking cheese pizza in movie history.

(Kevin walks outside, and a limousine is waiting for him. Cedric is standing in front of it, holding the box of fresh cheese pizza)

Cedric: Mr. McCallister, here's your very own... (opens the box, steam comes out of it) cheese pizza.

(NC is shown suddenly holding the pizza box)

NC: Wow. I don't even know where I got this. I just wanted a cheese pizza so bad, I somehow made it happen.

Malcolm: Can you share?

NC: (sighs) Okay. You three will get the pizza, (motions towards the Bums) they'll...get the box.

(Chester, Doe and Little Girl are pretty much glad with what they will receive)

Chester: Ha! Suckers.

(We go to a commercial. When we come back, we discover Mr. Hector discovering Kevin's stolen credit card, coupled with Kevin in the limousine watching The Grinch on TV)

NC (vo): Tim Curry runs Kevin's credit card to find out it's stolen, but it's done in one of my favorite dissolves of all time.

(The Grinch is shown doing his signature large grin, which immediately dissolves to Mr. Hector also grinning, satisfied at discovering the stolen card)

NC: Admit it, that was a much more satisfying live-action Grinch than anything Ron Howard gave us. (An image of Jim Carrey's Grinch is shown)

Mr. Hector: (smiling) Bingo.

("Your word has been CURRIED" appears again)