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Todd in the Shadows

Date Aired
October 7th 2009
Running Time
7:51
Next review
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Todd: Hello, everybody. Um...I'm finally putting my YouTube videos up all in one place. You know, people have been telling me I needed to do that for a long time, so that's what I'm gonna do, and I'm gonna do a little intro on all of them. Uh... You see, I'd been kicking around the idea of doing reviews like...I'd seen, like, The Nostalgia Critic and Angry Video Game Nerd; I'd seen them do it for a long time and been a huge fan. And I...never found a good reason or, you know, the motivation to actually try it. And...then I had the idea to do the pop song reviews, and I'd been writing reviews of songs...in my blog, which is long gone by now, you can't find it. But I'd been doing reviews in my blog for a long time, and....you know, I was scared of showing my face. And then I had just this great idea of this image of this...silhouette guy I can...sitting at his piano, he could play piano. And I just loved the image of it, so I couldn't stop myself from doing it. I was just so excited by it.

And this is the first episode. The humble...very humble beginnings of Todd In The Shadows. This was so much harder than I thought it was gonna be. And I'm not sure why I picked such an innocuous song to start off with. Like...like who...who's really bothered by "Down" by Jay Sean? And I started on it, I figured it'd be easy, and I found out I couldn't...figure out how to do anything. I didn't know how to act, didn't know how to write, didn't know how to edit, didn't know how to film, didn't know how to frame; I still don't know how much I've really learned about this since I've started. But you have to start somewhere—I started with this, for some reason. It's...it's rough, it was...it was a start. So, "Down" by Jay Sean, enjoy.

(Fades out)

"Down" by Jay Sean f/Lil Wayne
A pop song review

(Fade into Todd playing "Down" on his piano.)

Todd: Hello, friends. If you'll...just give me a moment, I'd like to indulge in one of my favorite pastimes—over-analyzing cheap pop songs. So...there's one song I wanna look at in particular. You may have heard it. It's Jay Sean's "Down".

Video for "Down"

Todd (VO): Now...maybe you don't pay attention to the pop charts, but I do, and this song is everywhere. I mean, it's on the pop stations, it's on the country stations, it's on the gospel stations...the Rush Limbaugh stations. And...you know, it's an impressive feat for a song that's only a word long.

Jay Sean: Down down down down down
Down down
Even if the sky is falling down

Todd: See? He even rhymes "down" with "down." Although, you know, I can't be too surprised it's a hit song right now. I mean, it sounds like everything else on the radio. I mean, everything else.

Jay Sean: Down down down down
Clips of...
Flo Rida: Low low low low
Akon: Na na na na
Chris Brown: With you, with you, with you, with you

Todd: I've...I've never heard a song that sounds this much like everything. I mean, it even has the now-required cameo from Lil Wayne, who has always sounded like he's going through puberty.

Lil Wayne: Down like she's supposed to be
She gets down all over me
Down like her temperature
'Cause to me, she's zero degrees

Todd: Uh...did Lil Wayne just lose control of his metaphor there? I always thought when you say a girl is zero degrees frozen, that meant she wasn't into you. I don't know. Also, why is he dressed like the guy from the White Stripes?

Lil Wayne: She's cold, over freeze
I got that girl from overseas
Now she's my Miss America
Now can I be her soldier, please?

Todd: Did he just say, "she's my Miss America," and then salute a British flag?

Against picture stamped with "LIL WAYNE UN-AMERICAN"
Lil Wayne: She's cold, over freeze
I got that girl from...

Todd just shrugs

Lil Wayne: Honestly I'm down like the economy

Todd: Heh, that's clever. "Down like the economy." I don't have a job. [beat] Thanks for the reminder, Lil Wayne. Although here's an interesting fact—Jay Sean is the first major pop singer of Sikh descent. [Picture of multiple Sikhs in prayer] Yeah, that's right. Just goes to show you that the pop charts are an all-inclusive place open to all creeds and all colors, all cultures, as long as they sound like everything else. I'm kind of amused that the guy's named Jay Sean. Like, he just had to have a name as generic as his song. I mean, it's Jay Sean. You know Jay Sean, I know Jay Sean, everyone knows Jay Sean. Jay Sean's a star. Livin' the Jay Sean era of music. Jay Sean, Jay...we've already got a bunch of Jays [album covers of Jay-Z and Ray J] and we've got a bunch of Seans [Sean Paul and Sean Kingston]. We certainly don't need a Jay Sean. Hey, wait a minute, is this the same guy that did "Tipsy" a few years back?

Clip of J-Kwon - "Tipsy"

Todd (VO): You know, "Tipsy" in "everybody in the club gettin tipsy"!

J-Kwon: Everybody in the club gettin tipsy

Todd (VO): No, I am informed that this is, in fact, J-Kwon. J-Kwon, not Jay Sean. Eh...

Todd: I mean, I don't even hate this song. I kinda like this song, a little. It's just something you don't think about. Just goes through you. You don't wake up in the morning wanting to hear "Down" by Jay Sean. It's not something you can connect to. I mean, "are you down" is not really a very romantic sentiment.

[Singing] Do you agree, agree, agree, agree, agree
Are you comfortable with the terms of this proposal

I mean, if you're gonna be repeating one word over and over again, why is it "down"? Why not something like "love" or "yours" or "forever" or..."forever." Hold up, let me check something here.
[Starts playing and singing] Down, down, baby are you down down down down down
It's like I've waited my whole life for this one night
It's gonna...

Oh, my God. It's...it's "Forever" by Chris Brown.

Video for "Forever"

Todd (VO): "Down" by Jay Sean is the same as "Forever" by Chris Brown. I mean, the melodies are a little different, but mostly it's the same song.

Intercut clips of the two videos
Jay Sean: You won't be lonely
Chris Brown: Double your pleasure

Todd (VO): I mean, they've got the same tempo, they've got the same chord structure, they're both about whisking away on a magic flying carpet to the eternal dance floor of love. There's not a major difference. This is great! This is just great 'cause "Forever" was Chris Brown's only good song. And now I don't even have to listen to that anymore 'cause we've got Jay Sean's "Down" to replace it. And so we can just delete this guy from the cultural memory banks forever. Awesome. See, Jay Sean? You do have a purpose—you're the new-and-improved Chris Brown. (Flashing: NOW WITH 31% LESS DOMESTIC ABUSE!) That's great.

Todd: Oh, I'm glad you're around. [Plays himself off, repeating...] Down


THE END

"Down" is owned by Cash Money Records

This review is owned by me, I guess

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