Guardians of the Galaxy (Disneycember)

(The Disneycember logo is shown, before showing pictures of Chris Hemsworth as Thor and Chris Evans as Captain America)

Doug (vo): It's funny. The films I thought would probably be Marvel's failures, "Thor" and "Captain America", everyone kinda knew they're gonna be okay, and they were right.

(Trailer clips and stills from "Guardians of the Galaxy" are shown next)

Doug (vo): However, for me, the film I thought would be okay, but everyone thought it was gonna be a failure, was "Guardians of the Galaxy". I guess I can kinda see where they were coming from. This a weird setup. We go from superheroes and supergods to intergalactic fugitives, one being a tree and one being a raccoon with a machine gun. Yeah, it's pretty silly. But I guess I knew it would be okay, because...it kind of embraced its insanity. The marketing said everything. This is not meant to be taken that seriously. It's a raccoon who swears. It's a tree that can only say three words. It's a giant great guy who literally doesn't know what sarcasm is. It's the chubby dude from "Parks and Recreation" suddenly made to look like a beefcake. This is gonna have a good sense of humour. And it did, and people seem to love it. Though from the beginning, you might think something else.

Story
Doug (vo): It starts off with our hero named Star Lord watching his mother die from cancer. She asks him to take his hand, he's too afraid, doesn't grab it, and she dies. He runs out into the field screaming because he lost his mother, and, suddenly, he's abducted by aliens. That sounds like a totally insane opening, and...it is, but...it's a totally insane film. Years later, he grows up and finds himself living among the aliens as a bounty hunter, treasure hunter, pretty much anything hunter that's usually illegal. (The film's villain, Ronan the Accuser, is shown briefly) But he gets mixed in with a plot from another boring bad guy you won't remember... God, is Loki really your best villain? Why is Marvel so bad at these? ...And he teams up with a group of outlaws to try and stop him.