Mr. T's Be Somebody or Be Somebody's Fool

Brad: Some people have different ways of teaching others how to be somebody in life. For instance, I plan on teaching my kids that if you watch enough extraterrestrial porn, then people might laugh at you on the Internet. And that's... terrible advice. Which is why we're lucky (holds up a DVD labeled "Celebrity Instructions Vol. 1", which features Mr. T prominently) that we have Mr. T to properly teach our kids how to make something of themselves.