Turbo - A Power Rangers Movie

(We start off with a trash can on the moon, and on a sunny day somehow, exploding as Rita Repulsa (played by Rachel Tietz) holding a broom comes out. All of her dialogue is given a bad dub)

Rita: Aah, it's the nicest weather the moon has ever had. It's time to conquer Earth!

(Cut to the Power Ranger HQ with a sign out that says "NOT A Secret Headquarters")

Zordon: Curses! Rita has escaped. (Zordon in this instance being played by Malcolm Ray) Recruit a whiny internet celebrity with attitude.

(Which happens to be...)

Nostalgia Critic: Hello, I'm the Nostalgia Critic. I remember it-- (He's soon zapped into a transport beam with him screaming on the way over. He's soon confused by the opening being like an episode of Mighty Morphin Power Rangers)

Singer: Go Nostalgia Critic!

NC: STOP IT! What's going on here? Why am I in the 60s version of the Batcave? (He soon notices Zordon)

Zordon: Greetings. I am Zordon, the big weird head.

NC: Uh, I think your Skype connection needs a little work there, buddy, 'cause you're coming in all blurry. Why don't I fiddle with these knobs?

(Zordon's head turns to the Wizard of Oz)

Wizard: (I can't understand that line)

(Next head is Emperor Palpatine)

Emperor: There is a great disturbance in the Force)

(Next head is Vigo the Carpathian from Ghostbusters 2)

Vigo: I, Vigo, the Scourge of Carpathia...

(Then finally back to Zordon)

Zordon: Stop it! I have brought you here because Rita, our oldest and most embarrassing enemy, has returned. She wishes to foil the Power Rangers' 20th Anniversary.

NC: What? Why?

Zordon: Because she's the most pathetic villain we've ever had (clips of Rita being annoying are shown) and resents the show for it, and wants to see everything connected to the Power Rangers destroyed.

NC: Well what do you need me for? I'm just a critic/comedian. A...critic-ian.

Zordon: That's precisely why we need you. (A TV soon shows Rita being annoying) Rita has taken over every screen in the world and shown one of the Power Rangers' most despised projects.

NC: *gasp* You don't mean...?

Zordon: Yes. (turning to the viewers) Turbo: A Power Rangers Movie.

(Clips of the movie are shown)

NC (vo): You want me to review the sequel to the first Power Rangers film? I didn't even like the show growing up. I was too old for it.

NC: I thought it was a silly exercise in combining Saved By the Bell with Godzilla stock footage.

Zordon: Exactly. The more you can tear this movie apart, the more it will lose its power.

NC: I don't know. I feel a little strange ripping into something that's been around for 20 years.

Rita: Come on, Nostalgia Critic! Are you afraid? You should be! Even the fans don't like this movie! And once they're reminded of how stupid it all was, they'll remember how stupid the show was, too! The Rangers will be destroyed, and I will be the greatest villain forever! Ahahahahaha!

NC: Alright you poorly dubbed vixen, I'm not afraid of any film! Bring it on! This is Turbo: A Power Rangers Movie.

NC (vo): So, to start off, why is it called that anyway? I get the Turbo part oddly enough, (Pictures of Super Street Fighter II Turbo, TurboPlay magazine and the TurboGraphx 16) it was the word of the week. But doesn't some of the epicness get lost when you refer to it as just A Power Rangers movie? Doesn't that make it sound more run-of-the-mill? Like the writers were asking "What kind of big, massive story should we tell?" And the producers were like "I don't care, just make A Power Rangers movie. Throw in a long winded Star Wars scroll for all I care."

(Said scroll comes up, narrated by Zordon)

Zordon: (narrating) On a distant planet lives a Great Wizard named Lerigot.

NC (vo): Oh boy, this is gonna be a slow movie, isn't it? Look at that. The narrator is waiting for the text to come up so he can read it.

Zordon: (narrating) ...Golden Key which unlocks the dimensional gateways of the universe. Lerigot...

NC (vo): Nothing like starting off a movie named Turbo with some slow, monotonous, awkwardly paced text.

(A green planet comes up)

NC (vo): We see on Planet Moldy Cookie that there's a group of soldiers chasing after (seeing Lerigot for the first time) oh Jesus. A Warwick Davis pale kid (?).