Lost in Adaptation: The Neverending Story

The Dom compares the 1979 German fantasy novel The Neverending Story with its 1984 film adaptation.

Intro
(shows The Dom standing with his arms folded as the title song of the film steadily grows louder, then dancing once the song states the title lyrics)

The Dom: WELCOME, Beautiful Watchers, to Lost in Adaptation, where we take a look at the various changes and choices made between pages and screen. Today's subject: a childhood favorite of many, including yours truly, The Neverending Story. In order to gauge how much I should assume you guys already know about this, I asked a control group of friends if they had seen the film and/or read the book; and the results were:

Poll
People Asked: 20

Saw the Film: 18

Read the Book: 0

Knew There Was a Book: 0

The Dom: Okey-dokey, I'm going to be assuming that no one's read the book. If you have, my bad; and either way, spoiler warning.

The Neverending Story, or The Unendlich Guschtiste (sic; text appears reading "*The Dom does NOT speak German, so what he just said was almost certainly complete gibberish..."), was originally written in German by author Michael Ende...E-E-Enday? Endie? Ende, who incidentally hated the film with a burning passion. I should let you know early on that Atreyu's quest and Bastian's eventual intervention only take up the first half of the book, with a *very* different follow-up story being covered in the remaining chapters.

The Dom (V.O.): What's that you say? "Well, that makes sense, Dom, you sexy bastard; they probably covered that in the sequels?" Alas, no. While the second film made some token effort to include references to the book, they still change it so much, it bears only a passing resemblance to it; and the third film went so completely off the rails, I can only assume the writers were smoking a neverending *doobie* while they worked -- buuuut I'm thinking anyone who actually watched them probably already guessed that the movies went off and did their own thing; I mean, can you imagine how that would have read?

(shows The Dom reading the Neverending Story book in faux-German)

The Dom: (translated from faux-German) Meanwhile, Jack Black was being a massive asshole and tearing up the library and shit, which made fireballs fly at a...Jewish tree...

The Dom (V.O.): So it seems we must rely almost entirely on the first film for...

What They Kept the Same
The Dom: The film does a pretty impressive job of sticking to the book's story. Both versions star a very young boy named Bastian, who's suffering from the triple bad luck whammy of recently losing his mother; the poor parenting of a good-natured, but emotionally detached father; and the cruel mistreatment of the local school bullies. In an attempt to escape them, he happens to hide in an old bookshop and half-inches a book titled The Neverending Story; he then sequesters himself away in a locked attic in his school to enjoy it. He reads about a magical land of unusual and massively varied creatures that is slowly being eaten away by, and being turned into, The Nothing -- to the film's credit, it does a pretty good job of attempting to visualize the invisible; I can't help but feel that Ende kind of wrote himself into a corner when he put himself in a position to have to describe something that *isn't there*.

The ruler and/or god of the world, who is simply known as the Childlike Empress, has fallen ill; and there seems to be some link between this and the apocalypse. For reasons known only to her, she chooses a ten-year-old boy named Atreyu to embark on a quest to find a cure. Atreyu and his horse Artax bounce around the world getting hints and pointers from ancient and mystical creatures and magical oracles (shows a sphinx with nude breasts from the film, with text reading "Lol sphinx boobies ^_^"), all the while facing tests of his bravery and self-worth. He teams up with a luckdragon named Falkor, who replaces Artax after he TRAUMATIZES OUR CHILDHOODS (shows Artax sinking into the Swamps of Sadness); and is helped by some little gnomes in a verbally abusive marriage.

Urgl: There's no fool like an old fool. (starts to walk away)

Engywook: WAIT! Stay here. (points upward) The *observatory*. To the winch, wench!

The Dom (V.O.): (snickers) Hang on a second; I'm just adding "Find reason to yell 'TO THE WINCH, WENCH!' at someone" to my bucket list.

Eventually, the Treymeister learns that the Empress needs to be given a new name by a *human* in order to be cured. Unable to find one, he returns to the Empress to admit his failure. She then reveals that she knew what the cure was all along, and his quest was actually intended to attract the *attention* of a human who was reading about it *right now*, blah blah blah, meta meta meta.

Incidentally, when I first saw this as a kid, I assumed from watching this scene:

Bastian: (staring out the attic window as a storm approaches) What a shame they don't ask *me*. My mother, she had such a *wonderful* name.

...that Bastian gave the Empress his mother's name. However, if you listen closely, you can just about make out the words:

Bastian: (yelling out the window into a rainstorm) MOOOOOOOON CHIIIIIIIIIIIIILD!!!

...which is the name he gives her in the book -- man, his mother had a *weird* name. Anyway, Bastian gives "Moooooooon Chiiiiiiiild!" her new name and saves the world. THE END...of the film, but not the book, which conveniently leads us to...

What They Changed
The Dom: Holy crap, did you know the horse could TALK?!?! I mean, it's not a *big* deal; but it *really* threw me off when I read it. I mean, *can* you imagine how different THAT scene would have been?!

(shows Artax sinking into the Swamps of Sadness)

Artax: (with the slowed-down voice of Marvin from the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy film) I think you ought to know, I'm feeling very depressed.

(shows Atreyu watching the swamp as it makes bubbling sounds)

The Dom (V.O.): Ah, *now* I get why they changed that. There really is something gut-wrenchingly heartbreaking about seeing animals suffer, moreso even than people sometimes; it's their trusting innocence and loyalty or something. Humanizing Artax by making him talk would probably have subtracted from that.

And, hey, remember the Rock Biter's (in the voice of the Rock Biter) "gooood strooong haaaands" speech? Not in the book. The Rock Biter -- whose real name is Pyornkrachzark, believe it or not -- only has a brief appearance at the start, and is never seen again. People hate on the movie for replacing Atreyu with a little white kid; but technically, he wasn't supposed to look like a Native American either -- his people's customs were just similar. Atreyu's actually rockin' a "green skin, blue hair" look.

The movie apparently felt the need to change a few names for, as far as I can see, no real reason: the magical world is meant to be called "Fantastica" rather than "Fantasia"; and it's Bastian Balthazar *Bux* (pronounced like "books") in the books -- I know it's spelled "Bux" (pronounced like "bucks"), but it's "Bux" (pronounced correctly). They say it in the first chapter, that it's fitting that he's *called* "Bux" because he loves to *read* books -- his, his name's "Books".

Bastian is also kind of an unlikable douchebag and massive pansy in the book. He's actually too much of a steaming pile of wuss to say the Empress' name, even as Fantastica falls apart around her; and the Empress kinda has to force him into it by throwing both their worlds into an infinite loop until he has no choice.

The Dom: Huh! At this point, I'm actually leaning towards the *film* being better than the book. (a crowd boos) Shut up, hipsters; it's rare, but it happens.

The Dom (V.O.): The two most iconic scenes were either done better in the film or were *just* in the film, their Bastian's more likable, and you just can't put an epic theme tune in a book. (plays the title theme from the film) Well, *that's* gonna be stuck in my head forever.

Anyway, let's see what they missed out on in...

What They Left Out Altogether
The Dom (V.O.): The book says that the geography of Fantastica changes depending on the subconscious intentions of the person traveling through it, meaning if you wanted to go somewhere, you would just have to set out in a random direction and, if you really wanted to get there, you would; however, if you secretly wanted to arrive somewhere else, you'd end up there instead -- this, I think, could have some rather...informative side effects.

(shows The Dom as a man on his phone in front of a building)

Man: Nawwww, baby, I'm really looking *forward* to spending the evening with your mother. Yes, I *do* know she's really into cross-stitching now. I should be there soon; I've been walking for about an hour. (looks behind him to see that the building is a gay bar) Huh! (throws his phone on the ground and walks toward the door)

The Dom: Okay, here's the fun bit. As I mentioned before, the film only covered the first half of the book; and as it turns out, that's a damn shame and is also the reason that Ende hated it so much.

The Dom (V.O.): Unlike in the movie, Fantastica doesn't immediately spring back into existence when the Childlike Empress is given her name. Instead, Bastian is given the task of rebuilding it piece by piece; but as it turns out, in Fantastica, humans have the ability to make everything they wish for not only instantly *become* true, but retroactively always have *been* true -- the process, however, erases something from his memory with every wish.

Bastian does an *excellent* job of rebuilding Fantastica in all its glory, and even improves on it in places. He then -- somewhat unsurprisingly, considering he is a ten-year-old boy who's been given the ultimate power to change himself and the world around him as he pleases -- proceeds to go *balls-to-the-walls*, *batshit mad* with power! His ego is fed by the admiration of his followers, so he keeps on creating more and more dangerous monsters and scenarios that give him a chance to be the hero he always wanted to be.

As you can imagine, after a while, this starts to cause some serious collateral damage: he teams up with an evil witch queen, banishes his new best friend Atreyu for trying to talk sense into him, an army of loyal followers flock to him, and he *marches* on the Ivory Tower to *usurp* the Childlike Empress and crown HIMSELF ruler of all Fantastica. Atreyu is forced to raise an ARMY of loyal Fantasticans in OPEN REBELLION! The battle that ensues is made of undiluted, weapons-grade AWESOME: ROCK BITERS fight iron giants, EAGLES fight dragons, LIGHT MAGIC fights dark, magical creatures on both sides fight to the death until the streets run red with blood and the IVORY TOWER BURNS to the GROUND!! Atreyu fights his way to the top of the CRUMBLING WALLS, and he and Bastian duel with swords!! Atreyu hesitates, and Bastian STABS him in the FUCKING CHEST!!

The Dom: Fuck me, this shit got DARK!!! I LOVE IT!!

The Dom (V.O.): *Man*, do I wish they had put this stuff in the movie. I mean, sure, it might have cost it its "U" rating (text appears reading "Or 'G' rating for my American brothers"); but I'd probably consider this one of the deepest kid's movies of *all time* if they'd gone on to show Bastian's fall to the dark side *after* the happy ending.

The end of the book chronicles Bastian's fall from power and his lonely travels seeking redemption for his actions. It's deep; but it's also pretty weird, as the places he visits are pretty surreal, like a village run by a monkey that serves as an insane asylum, a coastal town with a hive mind -- kinda like the Borg collective if they were all chilled-out hippies -- and a mine where a blind old man digs up glass paintings of people's forgotten dreams. He eventually discovers that the only way he can return to the human world is by finishing every story that he started in Fantastica; but with no memory and no wishes left, he can never do so.

Despite *everything* that happened, a recovered Atreyu turns up; and he and Falkor agree to finish everything *for* him so that he can go home. Bastian returns to Earth a greatly improved person -- but, alas, sans dragon -- and Atreyu and Falkor presumably spend the rest of their lives cleaning up the messes he left behind.

The Dom's Final Thoughts
The Dom: Okay, maybe the film wasn't better than the book after all. For one thing, it made me consider the question, "Is half a neverending story *still* a neverending story?"

(shows the equation "∞ ÷ 2 = ∞" as dramatic music plays)

The Dom: Ha, maths.

The Dom (V.O.): I totally understand why the author was pissed off. *He* wrote a story about someone who saved a world and then completely fucked it up, then the *filmmakers* came along and decided they could just pick and choose the elements of the story they liked. It's kinda like someone making a Romeo and Juliet movie and *ending* at the point where they get married; it would entirely change the fundamental nature of the narrative. Knowing this isn't gonna stop me loving the film, as I don't see why being a betrayal of the original source material and being a great movie has to be mutually exclusive. But, hey, I've just had a great idea.

The Dom: Hey, Hollywood, you know how you're going through this fetish at the moment where you reboot everything with a darker edge to it so that it'll appeal to a more modern audience?! (motions toward the NeverEnding Story film poster) Perfect candidate!

(The Dom looks around confusedly as his own voice starts to speak)

The Dom (V.O.): The Dom *would* eventually take his idea to Hollywood, but it turned out Leonardo DiCaprio beat him to it and stabbed him in the face to avoid competition -- but that's...another story.

The Dom: Wait, WHAT?!!